Education is crucial part in societies, children should learn to get A good position in the future, some parent give their kids money as a gift when they get a high score in their academic achievement, other believe, giving money to children is not a suitable method to reward them for good performance. In my perspective, I do not concur with the statement that parent give students money when they gain a good grade. In the following essay I will elaborate on a couple reason to explain my point of view.
First and foremost, when father and mother give their children money in this critical age, this will might encourage them to do bad habits like smoking or buying alcohol. In addition they will be ahuge attention to the money, because their goals only get money, this is compelling example , my friend used to give her son money when he gets a good score in his test to encourage him to study hard and increase their level, when his son became sixteen years old , he worked in restaurant and can gain own finance without need to his parent, hence he neglects his learning, then he give up the school. From this we can understand that we should learn our kids thart there is something important than money to concern about it, which is the education.
Furthermore, there are many things we can buy for our kids when they improve their score rather than giving money, for example, I always give my daughter gift like buy doll, nice dress, or anything she interests with to encourage her to study more, furthermore I explain to her a lot of information that help her to understand life perfectly, in addition we can go with our kids to see movie or nice trip, in this way we can spend enjoyable time. Moreover, school should give a gift for high level student when they have a good grade to incentive them to study hard, in conclusion, this ways give as a paramount methods to encourage our kids to be smart.
To sum up, the statement that giving money to talent kids is not as persuasive as to it stands, based on exposition that mentioned above, that the money will ruin kids behavior, and may lead to opposite result, especially when the student grow up and be independent after they begin their own jobs.
Education is crucial part in societies, children should learn to get A good position in the future, some parent give their kids money as a gift when they get a high score in their academic achievement, other believe, giving money to children is not a suitable method to reward them for good performance. In my perspective, I do not concur with the statement that parent give students money when they gain a good grade. In the following essay I will elaborate on a couple reason to explain my point of view.
First and foremost, when father and mother give their children money in this critical age, this will might encourage them to do bad habits like smoking or buying alcohol. In addition they will be ahuge attention to the money, because their goals only get money, this is compelling example , my friend used to give her son money when he gets a good score in his test to encourage him to study hard and increase their level, when his son became sixteen years old , he worked in restaurant and can gain own finance without need to his parent, hence he neglects his learning, then he give up the school. From this we can understand that we should learn our kids thart there is something important than money to concern about it, which is the education.
Furthermore, there are many things we can buy for our kids when they improve their score rather than giving money, for example, I always give my daughter gift like buy doll, nice dress, or anything she interests with to encourage her to study more, furthermore I explain to her a lot of information that help her to understand life perfectly, in addition we can go with our kids to see movie or nice trip, in this way we can spend enjoyable time. Moreover, school should give a gift for high level student when they have a good grade to incentive them to study hard, in conclusion, this ways give as a paramount methods to encourage our kids to be smart.
To sum up, the statement that giving money to talent kids is not as persuasive as to it stands, based on exposition that mentioned above, that the money will ruin kids behavior, and may lead to opposite result, especially when the student grow up and be independent after they begin their own jobs.
| Post date | Users | Rates | Link to Content |
|---|---|---|---|
| 2021-03-29 | talelaldabous | 60 | view |
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
Education is crucial part in societies c...
^^^
Line 2, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ple reason to explain my point of view First and foremost when father and mothe...
^^^
Line 2, column 287, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...nly get money this is compelling example my friend used to give her son money whe...
^^
Line 2, column 457, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...el when his son became sixteen years old he worked in restaurant and can gain own...
^^
Line 2, column 574, Rule ID: HE_VERB_AGR[1]
Message: The pronoun 'he' must be used with a third-person verb: 'gives'.
Suggestion: gives
... hence he neglects his learning then he give up the school From this we can understa...
^^^^
Line 3, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...oncern about it which is the education Furthermore there are many things we can...
^^^^
Line 4, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...hods to encourage our kids to be smart To sum up the statement that giving mone...
^^^
Line 4, column 296, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ependent after they begin their own jobs
^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
first, furthermore, hence, if, may, moreover, so, then, as to, for example, in addition, in conclusion, to sum up
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 10.0 15.1003584229 66% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 15.0 9.8082437276 153% => OK
Conjunction : 9.0 13.8261648746 65% => OK
Relative clauses : 15.0 11.0286738351 136% => OK
Pronoun: 61.0 43.0788530466 142% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 54.0 52.1666666667 104% => OK
Nominalization: 13.0 8.0752688172 161% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1778.0 1977.66487455 90% => OK
No of words: 398.0 407.700716846 98% => OK
Chars per words: 4.46733668342 4.8611393121 92% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.46653527281 4.48103885553 100% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.34166540819 2.67179642975 88% => OK
Unique words: 189.0 212.727598566 89% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.474874371859 0.524837075471 90% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 561.6 618.680645161 91% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.4 1.51630824373 92% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 0.0 9.59856630824 0% => OK
Article: 0.0 3.08781362007 0% => OK
Subordination: 0.0 3.51792114695 0% => More adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 0.0 1.86738351254 0% => OK
Preposition: 0.0 4.94265232975 0% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 1.0 20.6003584229 5% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 398.0 20.1344086022 1977% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 0.0 48.9658058833 0% => The essay contains lots of sentences with the similar length. More sentence varieties wanted.
Chars per sentence: 1778.0 100.406767564 1771% => Less chars_per_sentence wanted.
Words per sentence: 398.0 20.6045352989 1932% => Less words per sentence wanted.
Discourse Markers: 113.0 5.45110844103 2073% => Less transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 8.0 5.5376344086 144% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 1.0 11.8709677419 8% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 0.0 3.85842293907 0% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 0.0 4.88709677419 0% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.518186358254 0.236089414692 219% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.518186358254 0.076458572812 678% => Sentence topic similarity is high.
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0 0.0737576698707 0% => Sentences are similar to each other.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.344983774488 0.150856017488 229% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.220667677007 0.0645574589148 342% => More connections among paragraphs wanted.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 198.6 11.7677419355 1688% => Automated_readability_index is high.
flesch_reading_ease: -315.57 58.1214874552 -543% => Flesch_reading_ease is low.
smog_index: 0.0 6.10430107527 0% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 156.2 10.1575268817 1538% => Flesch kincaid grade is high.
coleman_liau_index: 10.13 10.9000537634 93% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 25.64 8.01818996416 320% => Dale chall readability score is high.
difficult_words: 57.0 86.8835125448 66% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 55.0 10.002688172 550% => Linsear_write_formula is high.
gunning_fog: 161.2 10.0537634409 1603% => Gunning_fog is high.
text_standard: 26.0 10.247311828 254% => The average readability is very high. Good job!
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 60.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 18.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.