when people move to another country, some of them decide to follow the customs of the new country while some others keep their own customs. Compare these two choices. Which one do you prefer? Support your answer with specific details.
Every year, many people immigrate to other countries with different culture. Most of them are challenged by a question. Should I keep my culture and customs in new country of adapt myself with theirs. I believe that we should alter ourselves and don't stick in our original culture. We should know that we have a new identity by moving to another country. Furthermore, it's necessary to become similar with new country's people to have better communications. Followings are my explanations about my reasons.
First of all, by moving to another country, which is totally different in culture, make us a different person. Since we are going to live in a new place, we will get impacts from their cultures and customs, consciously or even unconsciously. This new place with different people gives us a new identity. So, as we moved to a new country to spend rest our live, we should accept their cultural identity and customs too. For example, in my country Iran, all of the women should cover their hair and body. Men and women shouldn't touch their bodies unless they got married. They should follow Islamic rules and don't eat anything in public on Ramadan. If they don't follow these rules, they definitely put themselves in trouble. So, this new identity is belongs to you in a new country and it would be better to accept and respect to it.
Second, when you move to a new country, you need to find new friends and have a communication with others to become successful in your career. If you try to be different by ignoring new country's customs and beliefs, you will be alone or even, you may abandon by others. So, it is very important to try become similar to the others to find new friends, whom can help you to overcome difficulties of immigration. To illustrate, my friend told me a story that he was fired from his job after two months of immigration. He was in a very bad situation and decided to come back to Iran. But, his native friends offered a job in a new company because he had a great relationship with them due to he tried to become one of theirs. So, if we can't communicate with others because of our customs, it would be harder to reach our goals in a new country.
To sum up, moving and immigrating to a new country is very different with typical traveling. Since we decided to live in another country, we should think deeply about consequences of our behaviors and perspectives. If we want to be successful in a new country, we ought to accept their customs and culture. Just for a notion, think that a foreign person with his own customs try to communicate with you in office or university. What will be your reaction? W
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 247, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: don't
...ieve that we should alter ourselves and dont stick in our original culture. We shoul...
^^^^
Line 3, column 454, Rule ID: ALL_OF_THE[1]
Message: Simply use 'all the'.
Suggestion: all the
...s too. For example, in my country Iran, all of the women should cover their hair and body....
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 519, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: shouldn't
...over their hair and body. Men and women shouldnt touch their bodies unless they got marr...
^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 609, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: don't
...d. They should follow Islamic rules and dont eat anything in public on Ramadan. If t...
^^^^
Line 3, column 657, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: don't
... anything in public on Ramadan. If they dont follow these rules, they definitely put...
^^^^
Line 5, column 734, Rule ID: CANT[1]
Message: Did you mean 'can't' or 'cannot'?
Suggestion: can't; cannot
...ried to become one of theirs. So, if we cant communicate with others because of our ...
^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, first, furthermore, if, may, second, so, for example, first of all, to sum up
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 15.0 15.1003584229 99% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 16.0 9.8082437276 163% => OK
Conjunction : 18.0 13.8261648746 130% => OK
Relative clauses : 7.0 11.0286738351 63% => OK
Pronoun: 72.0 43.0788530466 167% => OK
Preposition: 79.0 52.1666666667 151% => OK
Nominalization: 6.0 8.0752688172 74% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2179.0 1977.66487455 110% => OK
No of words: 474.0 407.700716846 116% => OK
Chars per words: 4.5970464135 4.8611393121 95% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.66599839874 4.48103885553 104% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.67611771902 2.67179642975 100% => OK
Unique words: 221.0 212.727598566 104% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.466244725738 0.524837075471 89% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 683.1 618.680645161 110% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.4 1.51630824373 92% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 19.0 9.59856630824 198% => OK
Interrogative: 3.0 0.994623655914 302% => OK
Article: 0.0 3.08781362007 0% => OK
Subordination: 8.0 3.51792114695 227% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 0.0 1.86738351254 0% => OK
Preposition: 6.0 4.94265232975 121% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 28.0 20.6003584229 136% => OK
Sentence length: 16.0 20.1344086022 79% => OK
Sentence length SD: 30.4705235617 48.9658058833 62% => OK
Chars per sentence: 77.8214285714 100.406767564 78% => OK
Words per sentence: 16.9285714286 20.6045352989 82% => OK
Discourse Markers: 2.92857142857 5.45110844103 54% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 6.0 5.5376344086 108% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 9.0 11.8709677419 76% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 3.85842293907 104% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 15.0 4.88709677419 307% => Less facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.286370455752 0.236089414692 121% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0812671023634 0.076458572812 106% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0469148383069 0.0737576698707 64% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.189054949931 0.150856017488 125% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.00878554881991 0.0645574589148 14% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 8.7 11.7677419355 74% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 72.16 58.1214874552 124% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 7.2 10.1575268817 71% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 9.1 10.9000537634 83% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.13 8.01818996416 89% => OK
difficult_words: 81.0 86.8835125448 93% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 6.0 10.002688172 60% => Linsear_write_formula is low.
gunning_fog: 8.4 10.0537634409 84% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 10.247311828 88% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 66.6666666667 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 20.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.