Your school wants to improve the quality of students’ life in the dormitory. Which one of the following do you think the school should build in dorms? 1. a quiet study area; 2. an exercise room for students to keep physical well-being; 3. a room for ent

Essay topics:

Your school wants to improve the quality of students’ life in the dormitory. Which one of the following do you

think the school should build in dorms?

1. a quiet study area;

2. an exercise room for students to keep physical well-being;

3. a room for entertainment.

The future belongs to the youngsters, which requires the schools to give top priority to the rights and benefits of students. Not only should the schools emphasize on improving students’ academic performance, nut they ought to pay more attention to ensure the well-being of students’ life. When presented with the dilemma of what to build in the dorm, if I were the decision maker, I would like to choose to establish an exercise room for students to keep physical health compared with build a study area or an entertainment room.

Admittedly, students do need a comfortable and quiet space to fully concentrate on learning. But it does not mean that an extra study area in dorm is necessary. Nowadays, the vast majority of students have good manner, which indicates that they will keep the noise down if their roommates temporarily need to study. Even though the dormitories are extremely noisy so that they cannot be totally focused, they can go to the libraries for the sake of an excellent environment. What’s more, the students’ required courses have already been intensive, there is no reason for them to study all the time even if after class. Hence, an extra study area is meaningless and the funding can be better used.

The same can also hold for the entertainment room. Facing fierce competition with their peers, they have been saddled with heavy load of study. Generally, they are more likely to relax themselves after a whole day study, such as playing computer games, watching movies and so forth. However, all of these can be fulfilled in their rooms or the shopping malls rather than the useless entertainment room since the room specially for entertainment may not greatly match their own hobbies. According to the reports from the educational column of the New York Times, when referring their hobbies, above fifty percent of the university students choose playing video games, followed by the data that almost thirty percent of students choose exercising in gyms as their favourite. Both of these two popular demands cannot be satisfied by the entertainment room. Therefore, it is abrupt to establish an additional room for entertainment without exploring whether the students have preference to it.

Finally, taking the utility and students’ interests into account, there is every reason to believe that adding a exercise room in the dorms is the wisest option. First, it is obvious that this decision is conducive to students’ physical health. As they are suffer from staying in the classroom all day, taking regular exercises has been increasingly imperative. If they have easier access to do exercise in the dormitories, they do not have to travel a long distance to the gyms off campus. As a result, they can benefit a lot from sufficient exercise on a daily basis. In addition, offering a exercise room to the students is also an effective method to relieve their pressure from bustling study. For instance, they are busy with a number of assignments everyday, such as writing papers and preparing for endless tests, thus they are always stressed out. During such time, an exercise room will be the best choice for them to get away from daily grind. Consequently, establishing a room for exercise is conducive for their physical and psychological health.

In sum, although some people may consider a quite study area or a specialized entertainment space can effectively improve students’ life, I definitely believe that an exercise room can literally give the students a sense of well-being.

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Average: 7.3 (1 vote)
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Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 9, column 647, Rule ID: AFFORD_VBG[1]
Message: This verb is used with infinitive: 'to play'.
Suggestion: to play
...rcent of the university students choose playing video games, followed by the data that ...
^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 735, Rule ID: AFFORD_VBG[1]
Message: This verb is used with infinitive: 'to exercise'.
Suggestion: to exercise
...lmost thirty percent of students choose exercising in gyms as their favourite. Both of the...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 13, column 117, Rule ID: EN_A_VS_AN
Message: Use 'an' instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
Suggestion: an
... is every reason to believe that adding a exercise room in the dorms is the wises...
^
Line 13, column 268, Rule ID: BEEN_PART_AGREEMENT[1]
Message: Consider using a past participle here: 'suffered'.
Suggestion: suffered
...ents' physical health. As they are suffer from staying in the classroom all day, ...
^^^^^^
Line 13, column 603, Rule ID: EN_A_VS_AN
Message: Use 'an' instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
Suggestion: an
...on a daily basis. In addition, offering a exercise room to the students is also a...
^
Line 13, column 767, Rule ID: EVERYDAY_EVERY_DAY[3]
Message: 'Everyday' is an adjective. Did you mean 'every day'?
Suggestion: every day
...y are busy with a number of assignments everyday, such as writing papers and preparing f...
^^^^^^^^
Line 17, column 43, Rule ID: A_RB_NN[1]
Message: You used an adverb ('quite') instead an adjective, or a noun ('study') instead of another adjective.
... sum, although some people may consider a quite study area or a specialized entertainment spa...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, consequently, finally, first, hence, however, if, may, so, therefore, thus, well, for instance, in addition, such as, as a result

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 26.0 15.1003584229 172% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 18.0 9.8082437276 184% => OK
Conjunction : 11.0 13.8261648746 80% => OK
Relative clauses : 11.0 11.0286738351 100% => OK
Pronoun: 40.0 43.0788530466 93% => OK
Preposition: 73.0 52.1666666667 140% => OK
Nominalization: 15.0 8.0752688172 186% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2991.0 1977.66487455 151% => OK
No of words: 582.0 407.700716846 143% => Less content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.13917525773 4.8611393121 106% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.91168771031 4.48103885553 110% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.89786552737 2.67179642975 108% => OK
Unique words: 297.0 212.727598566 140% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.510309278351 0.524837075471 97% => OK
syllable_count: 931.5 618.680645161 151% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.51630824373 106% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 10.0 9.59856630824 104% => OK
Article: 6.0 3.08781362007 194% => OK
Subordination: 8.0 3.51792114695 227% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 1.0 1.86738351254 54% => OK
Preposition: 5.0 4.94265232975 101% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 26.0 20.6003584229 126% => OK
Sentence length: 22.0 20.1344086022 109% => OK
Sentence length SD: 56.8055048795 48.9658058833 116% => OK
Chars per sentence: 115.038461538 100.406767564 115% => OK
Words per sentence: 22.3846153846 20.6045352989 109% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.38461538462 5.45110844103 99% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.53405017921 110% => OK
Language errors: 7.0 5.5376344086 126% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 18.0 11.8709677419 152% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 3.85842293907 78% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 5.0 4.88709677419 102% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.401310173342 0.236089414692 170% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.112167202351 0.076458572812 147% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0751858629061 0.0737576698707 102% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.255224470594 0.150856017488 169% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0835751026856 0.0645574589148 129% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.0 11.7677419355 119% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 49.15 58.1214874552 85% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.9 10.1575268817 117% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.83 10.9000537634 118% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.47 8.01818996416 106% => OK
difficult_words: 138.0 86.8835125448 159% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 14.0 10.002688172 140% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.8 10.0537634409 107% => OK
text_standard: 14.0 10.247311828 137% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Write the essay in 30 minutes.

Rates: 73.3333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 22.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.