TOEFL integrated writing: Altruism
The author and The lecture talk about altruism which is defined as selfishness act of an animal or a human. The author in the reading passage supports the definition of altruism. The professor, however, opposes the statement which is mentioned in the reading passage. She says that after re-examination of such behavior, it is found that altruism is opposite to what has been mentioned earlier.
First, The author talks about altruism in a human. He says that humans show unselfish acts by sharing food or donating organs either to their family members or any stranger. However, the professor denies this claim. She mentions that donating organs is not completely an unselfish act. Humans do receive praise from society. Even though it is not rewarded but donating organs is a valuable act for some people.
Second, the author mentions meerkats. In the group of meerkats, there is always one guard, the sentinel, who looks after other meerkats when they are busy gathering or eating food, while the sentinel stands alone to watch the predator. The lecturer opposes it by saying that according to a recent examination of mammal behavior, it is found that the sentinel eats before the other member. They do not remain hungry or scarify their needs.
Lastly, the author adds that the sentinel also gets caught by the predator before the other meerkats because the sentinel struggle alone while others run into the burrow or stand in the group together. The professor refutes the argument. She says that when predators attack, the sentinel runs directly into the burrow as it stands near it. Furthermore, when other meerkats run together in a group they attract more attention from the predator than a single sentinel. Therefore, it completely denies the statement mentioned in the passage.
Comments
Essay evaluations by e-grader
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 180, Rule ID: ENGLISH_WORD_REPEAT_BEGINNING_RULE
Message: Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Reword the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
...ge supports the definition of altruism. The professor, however, opposes the stateme...
^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, furthermore, however, if, lastly, look, second, so, therefore, while
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 11.0 10.4613686534 105% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 0.0 5.04856512141 0% => OK
Conjunction : 8.0 7.30242825607 110% => OK
Relative clauses : 14.0 12.0772626932 116% => OK
Pronoun: 25.0 22.412803532 112% => OK
Preposition: 33.0 30.3222958057 109% => OK
Nominalization: 7.0 5.01324503311 140% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1501.0 1373.03311258 109% => OK
No of words: 295.0 270.72406181 109% => OK
Chars per words: 5.08813559322 5.08290768461 100% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.14434120667 4.04702891845 102% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.52266713392 2.5805825403 98% => OK
Unique words: 155.0 145.348785872 107% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.525423728814 0.540411800872 97% => OK
syllable_count: 455.4 419.366225166 109% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.55342163355 97% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 8.0 3.25607064018 246% => Less pronouns wanted as sentence beginning.
Article: 11.0 8.23620309051 134% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 1.25165562914 240% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 0.0 1.51434878587 0% => OK
Preposition: 1.0 2.5761589404 39% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 19.0 13.0662251656 145% => OK
Sentence length: 15.0 21.2450331126 71% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 49.7000420807 49.2860985944 101% => OK
Chars per sentence: 79.0 110.228320801 72% => OK
Words per sentence: 15.5263157895 21.698381199 72% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.52631578947 7.06452816374 64% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.09492273731 98% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 4.19205298013 24% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 5.0 4.33554083885 115% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 7.0 4.45695364238 157% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 7.0 4.27373068433 164% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.0500909516023 0.272083759551 18% => The similarity between the topic and the content is low.
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0201946654272 0.0996497079465 20% => Sentence topic similarity is low.
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0401083291768 0.0662205650399 61% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.036531231968 0.162205337803 23% => Maybe some paragraphs are off the topic.
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0471484036031 0.0443174109184 106% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 10.3 13.3589403974 77% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 64.71 53.8541721854 120% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 5.55761589404 56% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 8.0 11.0289183223 73% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.95 12.2367328918 98% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.97 8.42419426049 95% => OK
difficult_words: 67.0 63.6247240618 105% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 6.5 10.7273730684 61% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.0 10.498013245 76% => OK
text_standard: 8.0 11.2008830022 71% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
It is not exactly right on the topic in the view of e-grader. Maybe there is a wrong essay topic.
Rates: 3.33333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 1.0 Out of 30
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 180, Rule ID: ENGLISH_WORD_REPEAT_BEGINNING_RULE
Message: Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Reword the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
...ge supports the definition of altruism. The professor, however, opposes the stateme...
^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, furthermore, however, if, lastly, look, second, so, therefore, while
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 11.0 10.4613686534 105% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 0.0 5.04856512141 0% => OK
Conjunction : 8.0 7.30242825607 110% => OK
Relative clauses : 14.0 12.0772626932 116% => OK
Pronoun: 25.0 22.412803532 112% => OK
Preposition: 33.0 30.3222958057 109% => OK
Nominalization: 7.0 5.01324503311 140% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1501.0 1373.03311258 109% => OK
No of words: 295.0 270.72406181 109% => OK
Chars per words: 5.08813559322 5.08290768461 100% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.14434120667 4.04702891845 102% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.52266713392 2.5805825403 98% => OK
Unique words: 155.0 145.348785872 107% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.525423728814 0.540411800872 97% => OK
syllable_count: 455.4 419.366225166 109% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.55342163355 97% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 8.0 3.25607064018 246% => Less pronouns wanted as sentence beginning.
Article: 11.0 8.23620309051 134% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 1.25165562914 240% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 0.0 1.51434878587 0% => OK
Preposition: 1.0 2.5761589404 39% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 19.0 13.0662251656 145% => OK
Sentence length: 15.0 21.2450331126 71% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 49.7000420807 49.2860985944 101% => OK
Chars per sentence: 79.0 110.228320801 72% => OK
Words per sentence: 15.5263157895 21.698381199 72% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.52631578947 7.06452816374 64% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.09492273731 98% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 4.19205298013 24% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 5.0 4.33554083885 115% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 7.0 4.45695364238 157% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 7.0 4.27373068433 164% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.0500909516023 0.272083759551 18% => The similarity between the topic and the content is low.
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0201946654272 0.0996497079465 20% => Sentence topic similarity is low.
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0401083291768 0.0662205650399 61% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.036531231968 0.162205337803 23% => Maybe some paragraphs are off the topic.
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0471484036031 0.0443174109184 106% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 10.3 13.3589403974 77% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 64.71 53.8541721854 120% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 5.55761589404 56% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 8.0 11.0289183223 73% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.95 12.2367328918 98% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.97 8.42419426049 95% => OK
difficult_words: 67.0 63.6247240618 105% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 6.5 10.7273730684 61% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.0 10.498013245 76% => OK
text_standard: 8.0 11.2008830022 71% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
It is not exactly right on the topic in the view of e-grader. Maybe there is a wrong essay topic.
Rates: 3.33333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 1.0 Out of 30
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.