TPO-26 - Independent Writing Task Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?It is better for children to choose jobs that are similar to their parents’ jobs than to choose jobs that are very different from their parents’ job.Use specific r

In my opinnion, a wide variety of factors must be consider significantly when we are choosing our future jobs. The argument is whether children follow their parents' jobs or not. From my point of view, it is not necessary for children to follow different jobs from their parents' jobs, because of below reasons.

Initially, if children chose their own parents jobs, they would be assisted by enormous guidence resources. In other sense, children could be able to ask for help from parents during the education period regarding relevant jobs. For instance, my mother used to be a mathematic teacher and during my education, I solved my math problems whenever I felt those problems were extremely hard. Also, children could avoid mistakes before making them by learning from their parents' experiences related to jobs.

In addition, due to the fact that parents used to do same jobs as their children, they might still have strong social interaction, which children could exploite. As a consequence, parents could ask their friends who are still working in previous jobs to contribute children in order to attend as an intern. Hence, children might make sufficient resumes for future. Beside that, in some cases, parents used to occupy a factory and since they are now retired, their children could manage the factory on their behalf.

Last but not the least, not only choosing a job related to parents' jobs have mentioned benefitis for children, but also parents would be really appreciated for this decision of their own kids. As a result, after a child chose his parent jobs, his parents would reallize how much their child admires their enormous efforts for building the family. Hence, parents would feel precise.

To sum up, I am of the conviction children should follow their own parents' jobs to be successful during education, having more chance for future jobs and making their own parents happy.

Votes
Average: 7 (3 votes)
Essay Categories

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 7, column 60, Rule ID: TO_NON_BASE[1]
Message: The verb after "to" should be in the base form: 'parent'.
Suggestion: parent
...ast, not only choosing a job related to parents jobs have mentioned benefitis for child...
^^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, hence, if, really, regarding, so, still, for instance, in addition, as a result, in some cases, to sum up

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 12.0 15.1003584229 79% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 13.0 9.8082437276 133% => OK
Conjunction : 6.0 13.8261648746 43% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 5.0 11.0286738351 45% => OK
Pronoun: 34.0 43.0788530466 79% => OK
Preposition: 40.0 52.1666666667 77% => OK
Nominalization: 10.0 8.0752688172 124% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1597.0 1977.66487455 81% => OK
No of words: 315.0 407.700716846 77% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.06984126984 4.8611393121 104% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.21286593061 4.48103885553 94% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.4739183715 2.67179642975 93% => OK
Unique words: 171.0 212.727598566 80% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.542857142857 0.524837075471 103% => OK
syllable_count: 476.1 618.680645161 77% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 8.0 9.59856630824 83% => OK
Interrogative: 0.0 0.994623655914 0% => OK
Article: 2.0 3.08781362007 65% => OK
Subordination: 5.0 3.51792114695 142% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.86738351254 54% => OK
Preposition: 9.0 4.94265232975 182% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 15.0 20.6003584229 73% => OK
Sentence length: 21.0 20.1344086022 104% => OK
Sentence length SD: 44.2037705782 48.9658058833 90% => OK
Chars per sentence: 106.466666667 100.406767564 106% => OK
Words per sentence: 21.0 20.6045352989 102% => OK
Discourse Markers: 7.73333333333 5.45110844103 142% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.53405017921 110% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 5.5376344086 18% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 6.0 11.8709677419 51% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 3.85842293907 78% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 6.0 4.88709677419 123% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.374526238842 0.236089414692 159% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.156873060268 0.076458572812 205% => Sentence topic similarity is high.
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.105177869559 0.0737576698707 143% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.254355771824 0.150856017488 169% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0700099533315 0.0645574589148 108% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.9 11.7677419355 110% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 58.62 58.1214874552 101% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.3 10.1575268817 101% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.13 10.9000537634 111% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.94 8.01818996416 99% => OK
difficult_words: 65.0 86.8835125448 75% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 8.0 10.002688172 80% => Linsear_write_formula is low.
gunning_fog: 10.4 10.0537634409 103% => OK
text_standard: 8.0 10.247311828 78% => The average readability is low. Need to imporve the language.
What are above readability scores?

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Rates: 70.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 21.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.

it is not necessary for children to follow different jobs from their parents' jobs,
Description: can you re-write this sentence? it is confusing.

a wide variety of factors must be consider significantly
a wide variety of factors must be considered significantly

not only choosing a job related to parents' jobs have mentioned benefitis for children, but also parents would be really appreciated for this decision of their own kids.
Description: 'Not only...but also' is not used properly. can you re-write this sentence?

Sentence: In my opinnion, a wide variety of factors must be consider significantly when we are choosing our future jobs.
Error: opinnion Suggestion: opinion

Sentence: Initially, if children chose their own parents jobs, they would be assisted by enormous guidence resources.
Error: guidence Suggestion: No alternate word

Sentence: For instance, my mother used to be a mathematic teacher and during my education, I solved my math problems whenever I felt those problems were extremely hard.
Error: mathematic Suggestion: No alternate word

Sentence: In addition, due to the fact that parents used to do same jobs as their children, they might still have strong social interaction, which children could exploite.
Error: exploite Suggestion: No alternate word

Sentence: Last but not the least, not only choosing a job related to parents' jobs have mentioned benefitis for children, but also parents would be really appreciated for this decision of their own kids.
Error: benefitis Suggestion: benefits

Sentence: As a result, after a child chose his parent jobs, his parents would reallize how much their child admires their enormous efforts for building the family.
Error: reallize Suggestion: realize

flaws:
No. of Grammatical Errors: 3 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 6 2

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Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 20 in 30
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 3 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 6 2
No. of Sentences: 15 15
No. of Words: 315 350
No. of Characters: 1542 1500
No. of Different Words: 170 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.213 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.895 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.393 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 116 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 86 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 55 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 21 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 21 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 8.075 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.8 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.41 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.623 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.132 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5