"According to a recent report by our marketing department, during the past year, fewer people attended Super Screen produced movies than in any other year. And yet the percentage of positive reviews by movie reviewers about specific Super Screen movies ac

Essay topics:

"According to a recent report by our marketing department, during the past year, fewer people attended Super Screen produced movies than in any other year. And yet the percentage of positive reviews by movie reviewers about specific Super Screen movies actually increased during the last year. Clearly, the content of these reviews is not reaching enough of our prospective viewers. Thus, the problem lies not in the quality of our movies but with public's lack of awareness that movies of good quality are available. Super Screen should therefore allocate a greater quantity of its budget next year to reaching the public through advertising."

In the memo given, the advertising director suggests that the company must allocate more of its budget towards advertising, because the number of attendees has plummeted. This argument posed by the advertsing director is highly flawed, due to several unsupported assumptions.

First and foremost, the director has wrongly assumed that the drop in number of viewers is directly is solely due to the poor advertising and lack of awareness of good quality movies. This implies that there is no other factor as crucial as this, due to which the numbers have reduced.

Secondly, he assumed that allocating a larger budget would result in better advertising for the company. This implies that he has not accounted for any failure in advertising. This again is highly presumptuous, since the target audience might not be attracted even with the additional funding.

Finally, he only takes into acount the positive reviews, and thus assumes that there is nothing wrong with the quality of the movies. What if the remaining reviewers were dissatisfied by the quality provided? He must take into consideration, all those factors, before making a decision.

There are several points that could severly undermine his argument. For example, what if many of the movie goers left the city? This could have resulted in a reduced number of viewers at the theatre.

Also what if most of the movie goers, dont watch TV, or any other form of advertising? Then no matter how much money they invest, there is no way in which the target audience can be informed. Hence, his suggestion that, the advertising budget must increase, is not necessarily the right choice.

The arguments provided by the advertising director are highly flawed, and in order to make it cogent and acceptable, he must make certain changes. Firstly he must provide more evidence that the drop in viewers was not due to poor movie qualty, but due to the poor advertising employed. Secondly, he needs to show how the allocaed budget will improve the advertising method, and how it will eventually increase the number of viewers. After providing all these evidences, the argument might be more cogent!

Votes
Average: 1.6 (1 vote)
Essay Categories

Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 264, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...tor as crucial as this, due to which the numbers have reduced. Secondly, he a...
^^
Line 5, column 295, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...acted even with the additional funding. Finally, he only takes into acount the p...
^^^^^
Line 11, column 1, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Also,
...d number of viewers at the theatre. Also what if most of the movie goers, dont w...
^^^^
Line 11, column 39, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: don't
... Also what if most of the movie goers, dont watch TV, or any other form of advertis...
^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, finally, first, firstly, hence, if, second, secondly, so, then, thus, for example

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 15.0 19.6327345309 76% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 13.0 12.9520958084 100% => OK
Conjunction : 8.0 11.1786427146 72% => OK
Relative clauses : 11.0 13.6137724551 81% => OK
Pronoun: 30.0 28.8173652695 104% => OK
Preposition: 37.0 55.5748502994 67% => OK
Nominalization: 8.0 16.3942115768 49% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1812.0 2260.96107784 80% => OK
No of words: 355.0 441.139720559 80% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.10422535211 5.12650576532 100% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.34067318298 4.56307096286 95% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.67619866189 2.78398813304 96% => OK
Unique words: 188.0 204.123752495 92% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.529577464789 0.468620217663 113% => OK
syllable_count: 564.3 705.55239521 80% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 11.0 4.96107784431 222% => Less pronouns wanted as sentence beginning.
Interrogative: 2.0 0.471057884232 425% => OK
Article: 5.0 8.76447105788 57% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 2.70958083832 148% => OK
Conjunction: 5.0 1.67365269461 299% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 4.0 4.22255489022 95% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 20.0 19.7664670659 101% => OK
Sentence length: 17.0 22.8473053892 74% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 35.2726522961 57.8364921388 61% => OK
Chars per sentence: 90.6 119.503703932 76% => OK
Words per sentence: 17.75 23.324526521 76% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.6 5.70786347227 81% => OK
Paragraphs: 7.0 5.15768463074 136% => Less paragraphs wanted.
Language errors: 4.0 5.25449101796 76% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 8.0 8.20758483034 97% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 9.0 6.88822355289 131% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.67664670659 64% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.0524641795764 0.218282227539 24% => The similarity between the topic and the content is low.
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0191688353796 0.0743258471296 26% => Sentence topic similarity is low.
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0333087520997 0.0701772020484 47% => Sentences are similar to each other.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0270735485144 0.128457276422 21% => Maybe some paragraphs are off the topic.
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0196929237911 0.0628817314937 31% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.5 14.3799401198 80% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 54.22 48.3550499002 112% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.9 12.197005988 81% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.0 12.5979740519 95% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.53 8.32208582834 102% => OK
difficult_words: 91.0 98.500998004 92% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 12.3882235529 89% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.8 11.1389221557 79% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 11.9071856287 76% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Maximum six paragraphs wanted.
It is not exactly right on the topic in the view of e-grader. Maybe there is a wrong essay topic.

Rates: 16.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 1.0 Out of 6 -- The score is based on the average performance of 20,000 argument essays. This e-grader is not smart enough to check on arguments.
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.