The following appeared in a memo from the owner of a chain of cheese stores located throughout the United States. "For many years all the stores in our chain have stocked a wide variety of both domestic and imported cheeses. Last year, however, all of the five best-selling cheeses at our newest store were domestic cheddar cheeses from Wisconsin. Furthermore, a recent survey by Cheeses of the World magazine indicates an increasing preference for domestic cheeses among its subscribers. Since our company can reduce expenses by limiting inventory, the best way to improve profits in all of our stores is to discontinue stocking many of our varieties of imported cheese and concentrate primarily on domestic cheeses."
Write a response in which you discuss what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument and explain how the evidence would weaken or strengthen the argument.
The argument claimed in the memo asserts that the cheese store chain should discontinue stocking a plethora of varieties of imported cheese so as to improve profits. It may seem convincing at first glance, however, there is a dearth of actual facts and evidence to foster the argument which cannot appropriately justify the argument. Before hastily adopting the conclusion drawn in the memo, it is needed to scrutinize the fact and evidence that the author of the argument suggests.
First and foremost, the argument is based on the fact that the five best-selling cheeses at newest store were domestic in previous year. Although these cheeses were popular at the newest store in last year, there is no reason to believe that they would continue to do sales of the same magnitude in the coming year, which means it could be temporary popularity. Furthermore, considering the stores throughout the United States, the sales data of newest store that the author adduces does not cover the range wide enough to derive the conclusion. Thus, the argument of the author suggests is narrow in scope and myopic. To strengthen the opinion, the author needs to provide accurate projection based on sales data of entire chain of cheese stores in the long run.
Second, the author maintains his opinion without detailed survey data stating either the number or the pattern of preferences of the subscribers that participated in the survey. In addition, given that the survey is conducted among the subscribers of the magazine, not the customers of stores, it is not plausible to deem that the preference of subscribers could also be consistent with or extend to the actual purchase behavior of the customer. Therefore, if the author suggests the result of poll through conducting among the customers of stores, it could authenticate the contention of the author.
Finally, without the detailed evidence that demonstrates the excessive expense of maintenance and administration, the author should not rashly conclude that discontinuing stocking many of our varieties of imported cheese could improve profits. As imported cheeses are already packaged stably to preserve in the long run, the expense of stocking of imported cheese could be minute. Rather, it is possible that the maintenance and administration expense of the domestic cheese would be large enough to have adverse effect to the profit.
In conclusion, the argument cannot be validated until suggesting the sound and detailed evidence as mentioned above. Otherwise, because of these superficial and perfunctory evidences, the profit of chain of cheese stores could be worse than before.
Post date | Users | Rates | Link to Content |
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2019-07-09 | Nina Zhang | 69 | view |
2019-02-11 | inggg716 | 82 | view |
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Comments
Essay evaluation report
argument 1 -- OK
argument 2 -- OK
argument 3 -- not exactly.
Since our company can reduce expenses by limiting inventory, the best way to improve profits in all of our stores is to discontinue stocking many of our varieties of imported cheese and concentrate primarily on domestic cheeses.
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Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 4.5 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 16 15
No. of Words: 423 350
No. of Characters: 2170 1500
No. of Different Words: 194 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.535 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.13 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.73 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 180 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 120 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 90 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 48 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 26.438 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 7.607 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.625 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.363 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.621 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.119 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 141, Rule ID: SO_AS_TO[1]
Message: Use simply 'to'
Suggestion: to
...lethora of varieties of imported cheese so as to improve profits. It may seem convincing...
^^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 237, Rule ID: ACTUAL_EXPERIENCE[1]
Message: Use simply 'facts'.
Suggestion: facts
...t glance, however, there is a dearth of actual facts and evidence to foster the argument whi...
^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 445, Rule ID: THE_SUPERLATIVE[2]
Message: A determiner is probably missing here: 'of the newest'.
Suggestion: of the newest
...ghout the United States, the sales data of newest store that the author adduces does not ...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 29, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... profit. In conclusion, the argument cannot be validated until suggesting the...
^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, finally, first, furthermore, however, if, may, second, so, then, therefore, thus, as to, in addition, in conclusion
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 17.0 19.6327345309 87% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 13.0 12.9520958084 100% => OK
Conjunction : 10.0 11.1786427146 89% => OK
Relative clauses : 13.0 13.6137724551 95% => OK
Pronoun: 22.0 28.8173652695 76% => OK
Preposition: 68.0 55.5748502994 122% => OK
Nominalization: 19.0 16.3942115768 116% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2229.0 2260.96107784 99% => OK
No of words: 423.0 441.139720559 96% => OK
Chars per words: 5.2695035461 5.12650576532 103% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.53508145475 4.56307096286 99% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.80286543312 2.78398813304 101% => OK
Unique words: 201.0 204.123752495 98% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.475177304965 0.468620217663 101% => OK
syllable_count: 699.3 705.55239521 99% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.59920159681 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 5.0 4.96107784431 101% => OK
Article: 10.0 8.76447105788 114% => OK
Subordination: 5.0 2.70958083832 185% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.67365269461 0% => OK
Preposition: 7.0 4.22255489022 166% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 16.0 19.7664670659 81% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 26.0 22.8473053892 114% => OK
Sentence length SD: 46.9001182701 57.8364921388 81% => OK
Chars per sentence: 139.3125 119.503703932 117% => OK
Words per sentence: 26.4375 23.324526521 113% => OK
Discourse Markers: 7.5625 5.70786347227 132% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 4.0 5.25449101796 76% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 8.0 8.20758483034 97% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 6.0 6.88822355289 87% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.67664670659 43% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.229677184641 0.218282227539 105% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0761791358905 0.0743258471296 102% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.07043154153 0.0701772020484 100% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.116648453127 0.128457276422 91% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0741597093732 0.0628817314937 118% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 16.6 14.3799401198 115% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 36.63 48.3550499002 76% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 14.6 12.197005988 120% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.58 12.5979740519 108% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.18 8.32208582834 110% => OK
difficult_words: 114.0 98.500998004 116% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 13.0 12.3882235529 105% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.4 11.1389221557 111% => OK
text_standard: 13.0 11.9071856287 109% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.