An international development organization, in response to a vitamin A deficiency among people in the impoverished nation of Tagus, has engineered a new breed of millet high in vitamin A. While seeds for this new type of millet cost more, farmers will be paid subsidies for farming the new variety of millet. Since millet is already a staple food in Tagus, people will readily adopt the new variety. To combat vitamin A deficiency, the government of Tagus should do everything it can to promote this new type of millet.
To address Vitamin A deficiency an international development organization has engineered a new bread of millet which is high in Vitamin A. The Author claims that the government of Tagus does everything to promote this type of new millet. The author has also provided some conditions that proved his statement like the cost of new millet is more, so farmers will be paid more subsidies for farming and Millets is already a staple food in the Tagus. But there are still some loopholes in the assumption that the author has made.
Firstly, Before any new product or medicine comes to market for the consumers to intake it should be tested and confirm that there is no adverse effect on it. If the new millet that the government will promote has no adverse effect on consumers then it is safe for the people of Tagus to consume. There are no such test results or data in the above predictions that the author has mentioned. Before getting any data regarding the new millet government should not take any actions to promote it.
Secondly, It is important to check that if any new food or crop is being cultivated in the soil then is there any effect that may happen to the soil. There are many crops that have an adverse effect on soil. So the test must be done before farming any kind of new product or crop. Maybe this new type of millet that is a source of Vitamin A has an adverse effect on soil and the soil becomes hard and worse for cultivation for one or two years. Then this would not be a good sign for the Tagus. Certainly, the government should not allow planting the seed of new type of millet if there is a probability that it would do harm to the soil.
Another loophole regarding the author's predictions is that the Government tells people will accept new millet as millet is a staple food for people of Targus. The reason does not sounds good. The author has not provided any report of a survey that people would like the taste of new millet. Many are a taste of new millet is different from the taste of millets that they consume. The argument does not provide any pieces of information regarding this. So this assumption that people will readily adopt the new variety of millet is false. So before promoting any new variety of millet government should have a survey for the taste of new millets among the people of Targus.
The government should also enquire that if there is any other cheap food that matches the taste of people of Targus to combat vitamin A deficiency.
To sum up, the Government is promoting a new type of millet to combat vitamin A deficiency but there are several loopholes before consuming this king of millet. The author also needs to provide enough information and data to prove his statement.
Comments
e-rater score report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.0 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 23 15
No. of Words: 493 350
No. of Characters: 2208 1500
No. of Different Words: 183 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.712 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.479 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.384 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 155 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 90 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 51 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 43 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 21.435 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 8.88 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.696 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.355 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.537 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.107 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 90, Rule ID: A_UNCOUNTABLE[3]
Message: Uncountable nouns are usually not used with an indefinite article. Use simply 'new bread'.
Suggestion: new bread
...development organization has engineered a new bread of millet which is high in Vitamin A. T...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 393, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “Before” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...dictions that the author has mentioned. Before getting any data regarding the new mill...
^^^^^^
Line 5, column 331, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...s new type of millet that is a source of Vitamin A has an adverse effect on soil ...
^^
Line 7, column 180, Rule ID: DOES_X_HAS[1]
Message: Did you mean 'sound'? As 'do' is already inflected, the verb cannot also be inflected.
Suggestion: sound
...r people of Targus. The reason does not sounds good. The author has not provided any r...
^^^^^^
Line 7, column 180, Rule ID: DID_BASEFORM[3]
Message: The verb 'does' requires base form of the verb: 'sound'
Suggestion: sound
...r people of Targus. The reason does not sounds good. The author has not provided any r...
^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, firstly, if, may, regarding, second, secondly, so, still, then, kind of, to sum up
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 26.0 19.6327345309 132% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 14.0 12.9520958084 108% => OK
Conjunction : 12.0 11.1786427146 107% => OK
Relative clauses : 18.0 13.6137724551 132% => OK
Pronoun: 32.0 28.8173652695 111% => OK
Preposition: 61.0 55.5748502994 110% => OK
Nominalization: 18.0 16.3942115768 110% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2253.0 2260.96107784 100% => OK
No of words: 493.0 441.139720559 112% => OK
Chars per words: 4.56997971602 5.12650576532 89% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.71206996034 4.56307096286 103% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.41727125956 2.78398813304 87% => OK
Unique words: 179.0 204.123752495 88% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.3630831643 0.468620217663 77% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 724.5 705.55239521 103% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59920159681 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 1.0 4.96107784431 20% => OK
Article: 9.0 8.76447105788 103% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 2.70958083832 111% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.67365269461 60% => OK
Preposition: 4.0 4.22255489022 95% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 24.0 19.7664670659 121% => OK
Sentence length: 20.0 22.8473053892 88% => OK
Sentence length SD: 43.1629462682 57.8364921388 75% => OK
Chars per sentence: 93.875 119.503703932 79% => OK
Words per sentence: 20.5416666667 23.324526521 88% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.16666666667 5.70786347227 73% => OK
Paragraphs: 6.0 5.15768463074 116% => OK
Language errors: 5.0 5.25449101796 95% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 11.0 8.20758483034 134% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 9.0 6.88822355289 131% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 4.67664670659 86% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.438266927228 0.218282227539 201% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.141730029501 0.0743258471296 191% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.113987899398 0.0701772020484 162% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.239882664472 0.128457276422 187% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.130874130232 0.0628817314937 208% => More connections among paragraphs wanted.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 10.4 14.3799401198 72% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 59.64 48.3550499002 123% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.9 12.197005988 81% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 9.23 12.5979740519 73% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 6.87 8.32208582834 83% => OK
difficult_words: 70.0 98.500998004 71% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 12.3882235529 89% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.0 11.1389221557 90% => OK
text_standard: 10.0 11.9071856287 84% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.