A jazz music club in Monroe would be a tremendously profitable enterprise Currently the nearest jazz club is 65 miles away thus the proposed new jazz club in Monroe the C Note would have the local market all to itself Plus jazz is extremely popular in Mon

The proposal made by group of developers to make a jazz music club at Monroe is appealing. The speaker provides various evidence to support his proposal; however, when it is considered thoroughly, it consists of various assumptions, which must be validated, and various evidence about proposal should be discussed to make a proposal compelling.

At first, the speaker assume that since nearest jazz club is 65 miles away, people of Monroe would be happy to see a new jazz club C-note opening in their town. However, the speaker does not provide any survey about it. Since the people attend jazz club for recreational purpose, Monroe's people may have not any burden to ride for jazz club in weekend. Furthermore, there may have some special characteristic of distant jazz club that had attracted the Monroe's people such as facility, singer that cannot be provided by new proposed jazz club. In such cases, opening of jazz club in Monroe would not be profitable. Had the author provided any evidence about people sentiment about opening of jazz club in Monroe town, the proposal would have been compelling.

The speaker assert that more than 10000 people attended last year Monroe annual jazz festival and using this evidence, he believes that people would likely to attend jazz club in Monroe. However, the author comparison of annual jazz festival and jazz club is tenuous. The Jazz festival is celebrated one or few days in a year, where more people will attend since it is a rare festival. However, it does not provide any evidence that people will attend jazz club almost every day if it will be opened in Monroe. The author should have provided any other evidence about people desire for attending jazz club to make argument persuasive.

The presence of renowned jazz musician cannot be taken as telling evidence that if new jazz club is opened, then the club would be profitable. If people were interested in listening music from those musicians, why was a jazz club has not opened till now? May be the people are not interested towards them or people are complacent from listening high-rated jazz program in their radio.

The author presumes result of nationwide survey about spending in jazz is similar to that of Monroe town. However, the speaker does not provide any evidence to support it. May be the people of Monroe, suppose even though having penchant for jazz music, are not able to Spent around 500 dollars due to various factor such as unemployment, people's frugality. Had the speaker provided any reliable evidence about Monroe's people spending on jazz music, the proposal would have been strengthen.

Clearly, even though the speaker proposal about opening of jazz club was persuasive when read superficially, it consists of several flaws which are needed to be discussed to make argument compelling: Monroe's people desire to see new club in their town, wish to go club in regular basis, penchant for listening the music of renowned musician in their town, and will towards spending money on jazz.

Votes
Average: 7.2 (4 votes)
Essay Categories

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 5, column 13, Rule ID: MASS_AGREEMENT[2]
Message: Possible agreement error - use third-person verb forms for singular and mass nouns: 'asserts'.
Suggestion: asserts
...ld have been compelling. The speaker assert that more than 10000 people attended la...
^^^^^^
Line 7, column 260, Rule ID: HE_VERB_AGR[8]
Message: The proper name in singular (May) must be used with a third-person verb: 'is'.
Suggestion: is
... jazz club has not opened till now? May be the people are not interested towards t...
^^
Line 9, column 178, Rule ID: HE_VERB_AGR[8]
Message: The proper name in singular (May) must be used with a third-person verb: 'is'.
Suggestion: is
...provide any evidence to support it. May be the people of Monroe, suppose even thou...
^^
Line 9, column 480, Rule ID: BEEN_PART_AGREEMENT[1]
Message: Consider using a past participle here: 'strengthened'.
Suggestion: strengthened
...azz music, the proposal would have been strengthen. Clearly, even though the speaker pr...
^^^^^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
first, furthermore, however, if, may, so, then, such as

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 28.0 19.6327345309 143% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 19.0 12.9520958084 147% => OK
Conjunction : 6.0 11.1786427146 54% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 13.0 13.6137724551 95% => OK
Pronoun: 25.0 28.8173652695 87% => OK
Preposition: 64.0 55.5748502994 115% => OK
Nominalization: 14.0 16.3942115768 85% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2530.0 2260.96107784 112% => OK
No of words: 505.0 441.139720559 114% => OK
Chars per words: 5.0099009901 5.12650576532 98% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.74048574033 4.56307096286 104% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.4920805847 2.78398813304 90% => OK
Unique words: 198.0 204.123752495 97% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.392079207921 0.468620217663 84% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 786.6 705.55239521 111% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 4.0 4.96107784431 81% => OK
Interrogative: 3.0 0.471057884232 637% => Less interrogative sentences wanted.
Article: 13.0 8.76447105788 148% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 2.70958083832 148% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.67365269461 119% => OK
Preposition: 3.0 4.22255489022 71% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 21.0 19.7664670659 106% => OK
Sentence length: 24.0 22.8473053892 105% => OK
Sentence length SD: 72.9934610186 57.8364921388 126% => OK
Chars per sentence: 120.476190476 119.503703932 101% => OK
Words per sentence: 24.0476190476 23.324526521 103% => OK
Discourse Markers: 2.61904761905 5.70786347227 46% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 6.0 5.15768463074 116% => OK
Language errors: 4.0 5.25449101796 76% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 14.0 8.20758483034 171% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 6.88822355289 44% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 4.67664670659 86% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.451557777712 0.218282227539 207% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.20211788 0.0743258471296 272% => Sentence topic similarity is high.
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.121185686031 0.0701772020484 173% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.283860700526 0.128457276422 221% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.100944186934 0.0628817314937 161% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.2 14.3799401198 99% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 47.12 48.3550499002 97% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.7 12.197005988 104% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.07 12.5979740519 96% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.55 8.32208582834 91% => OK
difficult_words: 87.0 98.500998004 88% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 10.5 12.3882235529 85% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.6 11.1389221557 104% => OK
text_standard: 13.0 11.9071856287 109% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6 -- The score is based on the average performance of 20,000 argument essays. This e-grader is not smart enough to check on arguments.
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.