For the past five years, Mr. Charles Schade has been the music director at Steel City High School, and during that time the school band from Steel City High has won three regional band competitions. In addition, the quality of the music rehearsal facilities and musical instruments at Steel City High has improved markedly over the past five years. Because of such successes at Steel City High, the Saluda school board should hire Mr. Schade to plan and direct the general music education programs for the entire Saluda school system."
In this letter, a writer recommends that to success in regional band competitions, the Saluda school board should follow to hire Mr. Schade for planning and directing the general music education programs. To support this recommendation, the steel city high school adopted a similar plan for the past five years, and during that time this high school band has won three regional competitions and also the quality of the music rehearsal facilities and musical instruments has improved. However, this recommendation cannot be accepted as it is in that it rests on some premises all of which can be challenged in one way or another.
The first problem with the argument is that the writer assumes that improving the quality of the music rehearsal facilities and musical instruments because of Mr. Schade. However, there is no evidence to prove that this happen. For instance, maybe this improvement due to the efforts of the administrative council or some other department of the school that allocating more fund to improvement. Alternatively, perhaps students of steel city school are adroit in music, or they are played some music instrument before entering the high school, therefore leads to better results in competitions without the remarkable role of Schade.
Another problem is that the writer assumes that the both of high school are identical in all aspects. Maybe the Saluda high school does not enough budgets to enhance the quality of musical instruments. Alternatively, perhaps ability and talent of students in the Saluda school are less than students of Steel City school; hence Schade is not the able to preparation students for competitions. So a band instructor with a better resume is necessary.
The third problem is that the writer assumes that things remain same in all over years. Maybe interests of Saluda’s students are changed after five years. They pay attention to another field of art such as photography, painting and so forth, therefore hiring Schade is not beneficial.
| Post date | Users | Rates | Link to Content |
|---|---|---|---|
| 2019-10-10 | echoingdowns | 82 | view |
| 2017-06-20 | mahshid70 | 35 | view |
| 2017-04-17 | TOEFL_Taker_2016 | 38 | view |
| 2016-09-12 | yasminbrz | 30 | view |
| 2016-07-27 | maliheh | 35 | view |
- "For the past five years, Mr. Charles Schade has been the music director at Steel City High School, and during that time the school band from Steel City High has won three regional band competitions. In addition, the quality of the music rehearsal facilit 35
- For the past five years Mr Charles Schade has been the music director at Steel City High School and during that time the school band from Steel City High has won three regional band competitions In addition the quality of the music rehearsal facilities an 35
- One recent research study has indicated that many adolescents need more sleep than they are getting, and another study has shown that many high school students in our city are actually dissatisfied with their own academic performance. As a way of combatin 75
- even years ago, homeowners in nearby Brookville community adopted a set of restrictions on how the community's yards should be landscaped and what colors the exteriors of homes should be painted. Since then, average property values have tripled in Brookvi 58
- For the past five years, Mr. Charles Schade has been the music director at Steel City High School, and during that time the school band from Steel City High has won three regional band competitions. In addition, the quality of the music rehearsal faciliti 35
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
In this letter, a writer recommends that...
^^^
Line 2, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...n be challenged in one way or another. The first problem with the argument is t...
^^^
Line 3, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...without the remarkable role of Schade. Another problem is that the writer assum...
^^^
Line 3, column 452, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ctor with a better resume is necessary. The third problem is that the writer ass...
^^^^^^^
Line 4, column 267, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... painting and so forth, therefore hiring Schade is not beneficial.
^^
Discourse Markers used:
['also', 'first', 'hence', 'however', 'may', 'so', 'therefore', 'third', 'for instance', 'such as']
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance in Part of Speech:
Nouns: 0.291316526611 0.25644967241 114% => OK
Verbs: 0.128851540616 0.15541462614 83% => OK
Adjectives: 0.0868347338936 0.0836205057962 104% => OK
Adverbs: 0.047619047619 0.0520304965353 92% => OK
Pronouns: 0.0112044817927 0.0272364105082 41% => OK
Prepositions: 0.140056022409 0.125424944231 112% => OK
Participles: 0.0336134453782 0.0416121511921 81% => OK
Conjunctions: 2.86761450074 2.79052419416 103% => OK
Infinitives: 0.0280112044818 0.026700313972 105% => OK
Particles: 0.0 0.001811407834 0% => OK
Determiners: 0.128851540616 0.113004496875 114% => OK
Modal_auxiliary: 0.00840336134454 0.0255425247493 33% => OK
WH_determiners: 0.00280112044818 0.0127820249294 22% => Some subClauses wanted starting by 'Which, Who, What, Whom, Whose.....'
Vocabulary words and sentences:
No of characters: 2020.0 2731.13054187 74% => OK
No of words: 324.0 446.07635468 73% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 6.23456790123 6.12365571057 102% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.24264068712 4.57801047555 93% => OK
words length more than 5 chars: 0.41049382716 0.378187486979 109% => OK
words length more than 6 chars: 0.293209876543 0.287650121315 102% => OK
words length more than 7 chars: 0.182098765432 0.208842608468 87% => OK
words length more than 8 chars: 0.126543209877 0.135150697306 94% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.86761450074 2.79052419416 103% => OK
Unique words: 162.0 207.018472906 78% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.5 0.469332199767 107% => OK
Word variations: 51.0463639017 52.1807786196 98% => OK
How many sentences: 14.0 20.039408867 70% => OK
Sentence length: 23.1428571429 23.2022227129 100% => OK
Sentence length SD: 66.4856897293 57.7814097925 115% => OK
Chars per sentence: 144.285714286 141.986410481 102% => OK
Words per sentence: 23.1428571429 23.2022227129 100% => OK
Discourse Markers: 0.714285714286 0.724660767414 99% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 5.14285714286 78% => OK
Language errors: 5.0 3.58251231527 140% => OK
Readability: 52.4638447972 51.9672348444 101% => OK
Elegance: 2.4776119403 1.8405768891 135% => OK
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.573685331444 0.441005458295 130% => OK
Sentence sentence coherence: 0.118152312121 0.135418324435 87% => OK
Sentence sentence coherence SD: 0.0888065096805 0.0829849096947 107% => OK
Sentence paragraph coherence: 0.549694787903 0.58762219726 94% => OK
Sentence paragraph coherence SD: 0.164700618578 0.147661913831 112% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.23438450132 0.193483328276 121% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.176197765939 0.0970749176394 182% => OK
Paragraph paragraph coherence: 0.514135652575 0.42659136922 121% => OK
Paragraph paragraph coherence SD: 0.0867971634319 0.0774707102158 112% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.404783057549 0.312017818177 130% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.136749498012 0.0698173142475 196% => OK
Task Achievement:
Sentences with positive sentiment : 7.0 8.33743842365 84% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 6.0 6.87684729064 87% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 4.82512315271 21% => More neutral sentences wanted.
Positive topic words: 5.0 6.46551724138 77% => OK
Negative topic words: 3.0 5.36822660099 56% => OK
Neutral topic words: 0.0 2.82389162562 0% => More neutral topic words wanted.
Total topic words: 8.0 14.657635468 55% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
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Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6 -- The score is based on the average performance of 20,000 argument essays. This e-grader is not smart enough to check on arguments.
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.