A recently issued twenty-year study on headaches suffered by the residents of Mentia investigated the possible therapeutic effect of consuming salicylates. Salicylates are members of the same chemical family as aspirin, a medicine used to treat headaches. Although many foods are naturally rich in salicylates, food-processing companies also add salicylates to foods as preservatives. The twenty-year study found a correlation between the rise in the commercial use of salicylates and a steady decline in the average number of headaches reported by study participants. At the time when the study concluded, food-processing companies had just discovered that salicylates can also be used as flavor additives for foods, and, as a result, many companies plan to do so. Based on these study results, some health experts predict that residents of Mentia will suffer even fewer headaches in the future.
Write a response in which you discuss what questions would need to be answered in order to decide whether the prediction and the argument on which it is based are reasonable. Be sure to explain how the answers to these questions would help to evaluate the prediction.
A recent report shows that the residents of Mentia will suffer fewer headaches with the consumption of salicylates. However, the writer must answer the following questions to strengthen the claim.
First of all, the author claims that although many foods already have natural salicylates, food-processing companies also add some into foods as preservatives. Nevertheless, is this report written for those companies so that they can profess that the salicylate is good for the consumer because they must add some salicylates to preserve foods? Is this report proved by the third-party agency or any powerful institution? Moreover, if people eat the salicylate as preservatives, it will cause any other diseases?
Second, the writer states that the research has been studied for twenty years. On the other hand, the article does not mention any information about how many people participate in this study, and how the research was processed. Does the research take into account differences in age, occupation, eating habits, and physical fitness? Alternatively, does the number of participants is enough to represent the whole group of residents of Mentia? Such information is crucial to judge the research that the writer must provide.
Furthermore, the article points out that the study found a correlation between the rise in the commercial use of salicylates and a steady decline in the average number of headaches. However, the correlation is not equal to causality. Do any other factors cause the decline? For example, the weather is changing. The winter is no longer such cool so that residents would not feel pain in the winter. Or the health care system and living environment are improving. Such factors might also ameliorate the symptom of the headaches. Thus, it must be answered that does the study exclude other factors on the research, and only confirm salicylate is helpful to reduce the headaches.
In conclusion, to make the argument more convincing, the author must address the question mentioned on the above.
Comments
Essay evaluation report
argument 1 -- not exactly
argument 2 -- not OK
argument 3 -- OK
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Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.0 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 20 15
No. of Words: 323 350
No. of Characters: 1661 1500
No. of Different Words: 179 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.239 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.142 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.781 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 126 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 91 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 62 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 46 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 16.15 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 7.016 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.65 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.275 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.507 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.051 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, first, furthermore, however, if, moreover, nevertheless, second, so, then, third, thus, for example, in conclusion, first of all, on the other hand
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 13.0 19.6327345309 66% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 10.0 12.9520958084 77% => OK
Conjunction : 7.0 11.1786427146 63% => OK
Relative clauses : 9.0 13.6137724551 66% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 17.0 28.8173652695 59% => OK
Preposition: 33.0 55.5748502994 59% => More preposition wanted.
Nominalization: 10.0 16.3942115768 61% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1709.0 2260.96107784 76% => OK
No of words: 323.0 441.139720559 73% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.29102167183 5.12650576532 103% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.23936324884 4.56307096286 93% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.91950956863 2.78398813304 105% => OK
Unique words: 180.0 204.123752495 88% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.557275541796 0.468620217663 119% => OK
syllable_count: 531.0 705.55239521 75% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 2.0 4.96107784431 40% => OK
Article: 10.0 8.76447105788 114% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 2.70958083832 37% => OK
Conjunction: 4.0 1.67365269461 239% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 3.0 4.22255489022 71% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 20.0 19.7664670659 101% => OK
Sentence length: 16.0 22.8473053892 70% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 43.0982598257 57.8364921388 75% => OK
Chars per sentence: 85.45 119.503703932 72% => OK
Words per sentence: 16.15 23.324526521 69% => OK
Discourse Markers: 7.65 5.70786347227 134% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 0.0 5.25449101796 0% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 12.0 8.20758483034 146% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 1.0 6.88822355289 15% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 7.0 4.67664670659 150% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.136654343673 0.218282227539 63% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.036535372856 0.0743258471296 49% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0528560812331 0.0701772020484 75% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0720866156291 0.128457276422 56% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0533792363136 0.0628817314937 85% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.6 14.3799401198 81% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 55.24 48.3550499002 114% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.5 12.197005988 78% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.11 12.5979740519 104% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.39 8.32208582834 101% => OK
difficult_words: 81.0 98.500998004 82% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 9.0 12.3882235529 73% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.4 11.1389221557 75% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 11.9071856287 76% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.