There is now evidence that the relaxed pace of life in small towns promotes better health and greater longevity than
does the hectic pace of life in big cities. Businesses in the small town of Leeville report fewer days of sick leave taken
by individual workers than do businesses in the nearby large city of Masonton. Furthermore, Leeville has only one
physician for its one thousand residents, but in Masonton the proportion of physicians to residents is five times as
high. Finally, the average age of Leeville residents is significantly higher than that of Masonton residents. These
findings suggest that people seeking longer and healthier lives should consider moving to small communities.
The author concludes that a relaxed life in small towns promotes better health and great longevity than a hectic life in the big cities. The author uses the town of Leeville and the city of Masonton as an example to support his conclusion. The author argues that in Leeville, fewer sick leaves are reported by workers than by business in Masonton. The author also states that the ratio of physician to people is 5 to 1000 in Masonton while it is 1 to 1000 in Leeville. The author further argues that the average age of Leeville residents is far higher than that of the Masonton residents. The author then concludes from his evidence that the life in Leeville allows residents to live longer, healthier lives. However, the argument presented has made several assumptions that need to be considered before accepting or rejecting this argument.
Firstly, the author assumes that a fewer number of sick leaves reported implies that people are healthier. However, there may be other reasons. For example, maybe in the cities, business offer paid sick leaves to their employees so that when they get sick, they can take the day off. This is a common trend seen in medium and large scale companies in cities such as IT firms. On the other hand, workers living in small towns such as Leville might not be getting this benefit. These workers might be part of a labour workforce who get paid on a daily basis for the work they do. In that case, taking a 'sick leave' for that worker means that he will not get paid that day. As most of these workers might not be well off financially, they might still go to work even if they are feeling sick. Hence, the number of reported leaves is not a good comparison of general health between Masonton and Leeville.
Furthermore, the author assumes that having a lower doctor-to-people ratio means that there are less health problems in the area. This is not always true. It is possible that doctors are not setting up clinics in towns in general. This could be sue to many reasons. Maybe the local residents are not able to afford going to the doctor when they are sick. Also, the doctors might want to settle in cities where they will get paid better and be able to enjoy better facilities such as good schools for their children and a richer lifestyle. In either case, this satistic is also not enough to support the authors conclusion. In fact, this statistic might reveal that there is less healthcare access in the town of Leeville than in Masonton, which is not a good thing.
Finally, the author mentions that the average age of Leeville residents is significantly higher than that of Masonton residents. This might not imply that Leeville residents have better health. Perhaps the young population of Masonton has migrated to the city in lieu of better career opportunities. In another case, maybe residents of Masonton decided to move back to Leeville after retirement to escape the hectic life of cities. In both these cases, there is a chance of observing a higher average age among Leeville residents. Hence, additional data is required regarding the average age statistic. For example, has this statistic been collected over a period of time to ensure it remains constant?
In conclusion, the author's conclusion that life in small towns promotes health and longevity is reasonable. However, in the case of Leeville and Masonton, the evidence provided by the in the argument is not enough to justify the assumptions made. More data needs to be collected to strengthen this argument.
Comments
Essay evaluation report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 4.5 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 34 15
No. of Words: 608 350
No. of Characters: 2853 1500
No. of Different Words: 246 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.966 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.692 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.42 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 204 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 139 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 95 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 50 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 17.882 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 5.95 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.588 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.256 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.427 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.067 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 241, Rule ID: ENGLISH_WORD_REPEAT_BEGINNING_RULE
Message: Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Reword the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
...s an example to support his conclusion. The author argues that in Leeville, fewer s...
^^^
Line 1, column 349, Rule ID: ENGLISH_WORD_REPEAT_BEGINNING_RULE
Message: Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Reword the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
...y workers than by business in Masonton. The author also states that the ratio of ph...
^^^
Line 1, column 470, Rule ID: ENGLISH_WORD_REPEAT_BEGINNING_RULE
Message: Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Reword the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
...nton while it is 1 to 1000 in Leeville. The author further argues that the average ...
^^^
Line 1, column 590, Rule ID: ENGLISH_WORD_REPEAT_BEGINNING_RULE
Message: Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Reword the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
...er than that of the Masonton residents. The author then concludes from his evidence...
^^^
Line 9, column 316, Rule ID: AFFORD_VBG[1]
Message: This verb is used with infinitive: 'to go'.
Suggestion: to go
... local residents are not able to afford going to the doctor when they are sick. Also,...
^^^^^
Line 9, column 604, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[2]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'authors'' or 'author's'?
Suggestion: authors'; author's
...istic is also not enough to support the authors conclusion. In fact, this statistic mig...
^^^^^^^
Line 13, column 658, Rule ID: PERIOD_OF_TIME[1]
Message: Use simply 'period'.
Suggestion: period
...as this statistic been collected over a period of time to ensure it remains constant? In...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 17, column 20, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'authors'' or 'author's'?
Suggestion: authors'; author's
...ains constant? In conclusion, the authors conclusion that life in small towns pro...
^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, finally, first, firstly, furthermore, hence, however, if, may, regarding, so, still, then, well, while, for example, in conclusion, in fact, in general, such as, on the other hand
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 31.0 19.6327345309 158% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 13.0 12.9520958084 100% => OK
Conjunction : 9.0 11.1786427146 81% => OK
Relative clauses : 27.0 13.6137724551 198% => OK
Pronoun: 51.0 28.8173652695 177% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 85.0 55.5748502994 153% => OK
Nominalization: 8.0 16.3942115768 49% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2935.0 2260.96107784 130% => OK
No of words: 608.0 441.139720559 138% => Less content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.82730263158 5.12650576532 94% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.9656475924 4.56307096286 109% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.51365675591 2.78398813304 90% => OK
Unique words: 256.0 204.123752495 125% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.421052631579 0.468620217663 90% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 911.7 705.55239521 129% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59920159681 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 10.0 4.96107784431 202% => Less pronouns wanted as sentence beginning.
Article: 14.0 8.76447105788 160% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 2.70958083832 37% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.67365269461 0% => OK
Preposition: 8.0 4.22255489022 189% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 34.0 19.7664670659 172% => OK
Sentence length: 17.0 22.8473053892 74% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 33.0830061227 57.8364921388 57% => The essay contains lots of sentences with the similar length. More sentence varieties wanted.
Chars per sentence: 86.3235294118 119.503703932 72% => OK
Words per sentence: 17.8823529412 23.324526521 77% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.44117647059 5.70786347227 95% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 8.0 5.25449101796 152% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 10.0 8.20758483034 122% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 15.0 6.88822355289 218% => Less negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 9.0 4.67664670659 192% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.235558118917 0.218282227539 108% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0641569254926 0.0743258471296 86% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0927358267366 0.0701772020484 132% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.146547851944 0.128457276422 114% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.065074635928 0.0628817314937 103% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 10.3 14.3799401198 72% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 62.68 48.3550499002 130% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 8.7 12.197005988 71% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.44 12.5979740519 83% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.36 8.32208582834 88% => OK
difficult_words: 111.0 98.500998004 113% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 9.0 12.3882235529 73% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.8 11.1389221557 79% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 11.9071856287 76% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Write the essay in 30 minutes.
Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.