The best way for a society to prepare its young people for leadership in government, industry, or other fields is by instilling in them a sense of cooperation, not competition.
Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the claim. In developing and supporting your position, be sure to address the most compelling reasons or examples that could be used to challenge your position.
Cooperation and competition might seem conflicting ways of preparing children for their future roles. Some people claim that competition is harmful for young people since they learn how to argue instead of solving problems by mutual understanding. Although cooperation have a valuable impact on developing leadership abilities of young people, it should be noted that competition prepares young generations to real life and enables them to overreach their potentials.
First and foremost, in real life ,such as workplace or social situations, people usually have to deal with their opponents and learning how to tackle competition when they are young is a better preparation for young people for real life. For example, my country's education system bases on competition. In order to enter a decent high school and collage you have to pass extremely difficult exams.Since our population is about seventy five million, each year almost one and a half million people enter these exams;however the open positions in universities is about three-hundred thousand. Because of this reason, we learn that our friends are also our rivals in these exams and we face with this truth even we are children in primary school. This competition which is occur in our early ages prepare us for business world. For instance, we are already aware of our classmates will try to beat us for a job with a better salary and we are ready to tackle difficulties we encounter during this process. Ultimately, we benefit from competition because we know how to deal with when we become adults.
Second, competition is beneficial because it helps people to exceed their limitations in order to become the winner. As one can observe competition enables not only people to develop their abilities more but also the companies can produce better products due to competition. For example, at the beginning of PC era there was severe competition between Microsoft and Apple. They tried to add some value of the product of the opponent in order to be the winning side of the competition. For example, opening several windows idea is originally developed by Apple;however Microsoft took and improved it. As you can notice, this competition is beneficial because of this competition the technological achievements in computer area has occured.
Third, some people claim that cooperation gives opportunity to young people to learn how to help each other and come up with better results. Although it might be true, children can also learn it through competition. When people realize cooperation is more adventageous they try to reconcile even in competitive cases. For example, oil companies are rivals of each other in the business market; but when they realize that a law in a state might hurt both of their profits, they start to act together. As a result, people,as well as companies, might help each other for their common benefit.
To sum up, even though it might seem that cooperation is more beneficial for children, it never provides the results that can be gained via competition. Since competition prepares young generations for tackling problems when they become adults, help them to be more productive and successful. At the same time, they learn to help each other in case of need due to instilling in competition.
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Sentence: This competition which is occur in our early ages prepare us for business world.
Description: The token is is not usually followed by a verb, base: uninflected present, imperative or infinitive
Suggestion: Refer to is and occur
As one can observe competition enables not only people to develop their abilities more but also the companies can produce better products due to competition.
Description: not only ... but also ... is not used properly
No. of Words: 541 350
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 5.0 out of 6
Category: Very Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 1 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 24 15
No. of Words: 541 350
No. of Characters: 2697 1500
No. of Different Words: 251 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.823 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.985 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.735 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 186 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 138 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 95 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 71 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 22.542 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 9.124 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.583 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.312 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.508 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.149 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5