"The best way for a society to prepare its young people for leadership in government, industry, or other fields is by instilling in them a sense of cooperation, not competition."
Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the claim. In developing and supporting your position, be sure to address the most compelling reasons and/or examples that could be used to challenge your position.
Undoubtedly, young generations are the main drive for the developmnet of every society. For young people to be best prepared for future jobs and positions, some people claim that its best to provide a cooperative environment for them, while others opine that competitive situation can prepare them more appropriately. I am of mixed opinion on this issue, striking a balance between cooperation and competition for nurturing young people is the most advantegous choice.
Admittedly, through cooperation the talents and abilities of people can be grown considerably in almost every field. At education, teaching cooperation to pupils can have many positive implications on their interpersonal skills and learning process. Cooperation provides a calm and intimate atmosphere which can further develop the talents of both weak and smart students. Furthermore, by lack of competition in some fields the creativity of people is promoted and a sense of collaboration among youngster can result into better output and performance.Moreover, cooperative peers are able to identify the weaknesses of each other and help to rectify errors and shorcomings efficiently.
Having said that, competition can not be ignored in all fields. In sports, a sense of rivarly can be the best source of motivation for young athletes to surpass their rivals and exhibit their best ability. On the other hand, some jobs need competitive and ambititous leaders, therefore young people should acquire the competitive skills in order to succeed in excecutive jobs. For example, managers of big companies require to compete in a vast market in order to preserve their high rank among the customers.One of the major merits of competition is that managers and their organizations are forced to provide the best service to the society, as a result both customers and companies will take advantage from betters quality and higher profits. Although, the aggression and envy is highly probable in competitive environment, but through reasonable control of teachers, government and parents, negative outcomes can be impeded.
In summary, both cooperation and competition can bring numerous values for the young people regarding their future jobs. Depending on their desired careers and field of activity a reasonable level of both can be beneficial.
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 5, column 242, Rule ID: AFFORD_VB
Message: This verb is used with the infinitive: 'to process'
Suggestion: to process
...their interpersonal skills and learning process. Cooperation provides a calm and intima...
Line 5, column 553, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
...sult into better output and performance.Moreover, cooperative peers are able to identify...
Line 9, column 425, Rule ID: ALLOW_TO
Message: Did you mean 'competing'? Or maybe you should add a pronoun? In active voice, 'require' + 'to' takes an object, usually a pronoun.
...mple, managers of big companies require to compete in a vast market in order to preserve t...
Line 9, column 510, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
...rve their high rank among the customers.One of the major merits of competition is t...
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, furthermore, if, moreover, regarding, so, therefore, while, for example, in summary, as a result, on the other hand
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 13.0 19.5258426966 67% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 13.0 12.4196629213 105% => OK
Conjunction : 20.0 14.8657303371 135% => OK
Relative clauses : 5.0 11.3162921348 44% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 16.0 33.0505617978 48% => OK
Preposition: 51.0 58.6224719101 87% => OK
Nominalization: 19.0 12.9106741573 147% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1972.0 2235.4752809 88% => OK
No of words: 357.0 442.535393258 81% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.52380952381 5.05705443957 109% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.34677393335 4.55969084622 95% => OK
Word Length SD: 3.12611316865 2.79657885939 112% => OK
Unique words: 198.0 215.323595506 92% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.554621848739 0.4932671777 112% => OK
syllable_count: 624.6 704.065955056 89% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.59117977528 107% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 1.0 6.24550561798 16% => OK
Article: 2.0 4.99550561798 40% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 3.10617977528 64% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.77640449438 56% => OK
Preposition: 6.0 4.38483146067 137% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 14.0 20.2370786517 69% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 25.0 23.0359550562 109% => OK
Sentence length SD: 82.7352551756 60.3974514979 137% => OK
Chars per sentence: 140.857142857 118.986275619 118% => OK
Words per sentence: 25.5 23.4991977007 109% => OK
Discourse Markers: 8.57142857143 5.21951772744 164% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.97078651685 80% => OK
Language errors: 4.0 7.80617977528 51% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 12.0 10.2758426966 117% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 1.0 5.13820224719 19% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 4.83258426966 21% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.17449600186 0.243740707755 72% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0662083037115 0.0831039109588 80% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0668790219563 0.0758088955206 88% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.119597007663 0.150359130593 80% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0759736964179 0.0667264976115 114% => OK
automated_readability_index: 17.3 14.1392134831 122% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 37.64 48.8420337079 77% => OK
smog_index: 13.0 7.92365168539 164% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 14.2 12.1743820225 117% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 15.03 12.1639044944 124% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.65 8.38706741573 115% => OK
difficult_words: 108.0 100.480337079 107% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 13.5 11.8971910112 113% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.0 11.2143820225 107% => OK
text_standard: 14.0 11.7820224719 119% => OK
What are above readability scores?
Better to have 5/6 paragraphs with 3/4 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: reason 4. address both of the views presented for reason 4 (optional)
para 6: conclusion.
Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.