Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?
Most people can solve important problems in their lives by themselves or with the help of their families; help from the government is often unnecessary.
Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
People often must deal with lots of tough issues to by themselves. This will raise the question of whether most people can solve important problems in their lives by themselves instead of being helped by the government. I disagree with the statement.
First of all, when people face financial problems they usually search for help from the government because the government can provide them with subsidies. For example, when I was an undergraduate, I studies in the National Taiwan University. I always had to rent an apartment outside the campus to live. However, the price of apartments near the campus were always expensive, and I did not have enough funds to afford these apartments. Fortunately, the Taipei city government just built many brand-new apartments, and the local government would offer a lower rents to the students. Therefore, I decided to lend other housings being offered by the local government, and these residences were relatively lower. Finally, I could have an affordable apartment to live at that time. By contrast, if I had not chosen to rent the apartment provided by the local government, I might have not been able to find a place to live.
Second, people always need to be helped by the government when they confront judicial issues. For instance, when I was an undergraduate, I lived in a city which had a higher crime rate. One day, I found that some cash in my apartment was stolen by the thieves. Therefore, I searched for the help from the owner of the apartment immediately. However, even if he reviewed the monitor of the apartment, we could not obtain some useful clues. Finally, I decided to ask help from the police. The police utilized many advanced tools, such as a face-detecting machine, to help me to find the thieves. As a result, I could get my money back in the end due to the assistance of the police. In contrast, if I had not decided to require the police to tackle this case, I might have not been capable of finding my funds back forever.
To sum up, I disagree with the statement. For one thing, we will often need to utilize the subsidies provided by the government. For another thing, we will always search for help from the government to address many judicial problems.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 84, Rule ID: WHETHER
Message: Wordiness: Shorten this phrase to the shortest possible suggestion.
Suggestion: whether; the question whether
...ssues to by themselves. This will raise the question of whether most people can solve important problem...
Line 3, column 200, Rule ID: NON3PRS_VERB
Message: The pronoun 'I' must be used with a non-third-person form of a verb: 'study'
...example, when I was an undergraduate, I studies in the National Taiwan University. I al...
Line 5, column 566, Rule ID: HELP_TO_FIND
Message: This phrase is probably grammatically incorrect. Write 'help me find' instead.
Suggestion: help me find
...s, such as a face-detecting machine, to help me to find the thieves. As a result, I could get m...
Transition Words or Phrases used:
finally, first, however, if, second, so, therefore, another thing, for example, for instance, in contrast, such as, as a result, first of all, for another thing, for one thing, to sum up
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 10.0 19.5258426966 51% => More to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 14.0 12.4196629213 113% => OK
Conjunction : 3.0 14.8657303371 20% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 7.0 11.3162921348 62% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 38.0 33.0505617978 115% => OK
Preposition: 56.0 58.6224719101 96% => OK
Nominalization: 21.0 12.9106741573 163% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1853.0 2235.4752809 83% => OK
No of words: 386.0 442.535393258 87% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.80051813472 5.05705443957 95% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.43248042346 4.55969084622 97% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.75960246824 2.79657885939 99% => OK
Unique words: 185.0 215.323595506 86% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.479274611399 0.4932671777 97% => OK
syllable_count: 582.3 704.065955056 83% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59117977528 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 17.0 6.24550561798 272% => Less pronouns wanted as sentence beginning.
Article: 3.0 4.99550561798 60% => OK
Subordination: 7.0 3.10617977528 225% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 3.0 1.77640449438 169% => OK
Preposition: 4.0 4.38483146067 91% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 23.0 20.2370786517 114% => OK
Sentence length: 16.0 23.0359550562 69% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 35.4575280427 60.3974514979 59% => The essay contains lots of sentences with the similar length. More sentence varieties wanted.
Chars per sentence: 80.5652173913 118.986275619 68% => OK
Words per sentence: 16.7826086957 23.4991977007 71% => OK
Discourse Markers: 8.08695652174 5.21951772744 155% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.97078651685 80% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 7.80617977528 38% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 4.0 10.2758426966 39% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 10.0 5.13820224719 195% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 9.0 4.83258426966 186% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.244238251156 0.243740707755 100% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.077084787927 0.0831039109588 93% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0900584104503 0.0758088955206 119% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.187494637053 0.150359130593 125% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.12718536382 0.0667264976115 191% => OK
automated_readability_index: 9.6 14.1392134831 68% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 63.7 48.8420337079 130% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.92365168539 39% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 8.4 12.1743820225 69% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.26 12.1639044944 84% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.5 8.38706741573 89% => OK
difficult_words: 75.0 100.480337079 75% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 6.5 11.8971910112 55% => Linsear_write_formula is low.
gunning_fog: 8.4 11.2143820225 75% => OK
text_standard: 8.0 11.7820224719 68% => The average readability is low. Need to imporve the language.
What are above readability scores?
Better to have 5/6 paragraphs with 3/4 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: reason 4. address both of the views presented for reason 4 (optional)
para 6: conclusion.
Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.