Governments officials should rely on their own judgment rather than unquestioningly carry out the will of the people they serve Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the recommendation and explain your reason

Essay topics:

Governments officials should rely on their own judgment rather than unquestioningly carry out the will of the people they serve.

Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the recommendation and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, describe specific circumstances in which adopting the recommendation would or would not be advantageous and explain how these examples shape your position.

Government officials have the power to affect the society greatly, depending on the decisions they make. Even though no decision can satisfy all people, it is still mandatory to make the most efficient choice. I believe that the government officials should flexibly choose between the judgment and the will of the people they serve.
First of all, there could be situations where governments should rely on their own judgement, especially when what people they serve desire is unjust. In the United States, there is a famous idiom that describes such sensation, feeling of the gut. It is confound to distinguish whether people's desire is based on their selfish and greedy needs, or if it's for the nation's welfare. In such situations, the government officials should figure out with the feeling in their guts to make a choice that is best for everyone. I would like to mention one of the famous cases in South Korea as an example. Once, an extremely controversial policy which forbid people from watching lurid videos was on the process of being accepted. The society divided into a dichotomy, causing a majority of the men to protest against it, and majority of the women protesting against men who opposed against the policy. The men protested that it was their right to watch any types of videos as they desired, which might seem plausible, however, many morbid sexual transgressions were usually a imitation of what the criminals had watched in the videos. Eventually, even though the voice of the men was much more powerful than women's, the government officials determinedly pursued with accepting the policy, which enabled a better consequence. Many young children and adults got detached from such videos, and led to a decrease in the number of innocent women getting involved in such truculent criminality. If the government had simply followed the will of the people they served, especially those who have a powerful voice, without any suspicion, then the consequence would not have been this positive.
Furthermore, there are also times when the government should carry out what the public desires. Sometimes, it is arduous for the officials to create policies that are germane to the actual reality. This may not be representative for all the nations, but the government officials are usually born in a prestigious family who did not have any experience what the common people faced every day. Because of this, the government officials have the propensity to stick to the theory instead of altering the policies in a malleable way to make it apposite to the reality. In such cases, it is better for them to listen to the public's voices instead of pursuing with their own judgments. For example, one of the former presidents who became phenomenal due to being the first female president in South Korea, acted out in certain ways that the public did not understand. The government officials were too timid to dare speak out and question the actions against the president. However, the public started getting dubious about the suspicious behaviors, accusing the president of being guilty in causing felonies. The minority of the officials started listening to the public and collected evidences that are potent to make the president guilty. Eventually, the public and the officials turned their backs on the president, who got sentenced to jail. If the government officials had not listened to the public and simply followed their timorous will, they would not have been able to forestall the transgressions the president was pursuing.
To sum up, sometimes what people wish could be unjust but could also be extremely pure, pursuing for the nation's welfare. I believe that the government officials should flexibly apply either their own judgment or carrying out what the public desires, on situations where each choices are more apropos.

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Average: 6.6 (1 vote)
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 254, Rule ID: BEEN_PART_AGREEMENT[1]
Message: Consider using a past participle here: 'confounded'.
Suggestion: confounded
...ch sensation, feeling of the gut. It is confound to distinguish whether peoples desire i...
^^^^^^^^
Line 2, column 596, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “Once” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...ous cases in South Korea as an example. Once, an extremely controversial policy whic...
^^^^
Line 2, column 1065, Rule ID: EN_A_VS_AN
Message: Use 'an' instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
Suggestion: an
...rbid sexual transgressions were usually a imitation of what the criminals had wat...
^
Line 3, column 510, Rule ID: IN_A_X_MANNER[1]
Message: Consider replacing "in a malleable way" with adverb for "malleable"; eg, "in a hasty manner" with "hastily".
...theory instead of altering the policies in a malleable way to make it apposite to the reality. In ...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, furthermore, however, if, may, so, still, then, for example, first of all, to sum up

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 28.0 19.5258426966 143% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 17.0 12.4196629213 137% => OK
Conjunction : 13.0 14.8657303371 87% => OK
Relative clauses : 20.0 11.3162921348 177% => OK
Pronoun: 38.0 33.0505617978 115% => OK
Preposition: 81.0 58.6224719101 138% => OK
Nominalization: 21.0 12.9106741573 163% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 3217.0 2235.4752809 144% => OK
No of words: 632.0 442.535393258 143% => Less content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.09018987342 5.05705443957 101% => OK
Fourth root words length: 5.01394158123 4.55969084622 110% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.67752143489 2.79657885939 96% => OK
Unique words: 296.0 215.323595506 137% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.46835443038 0.4932671777 95% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 997.2 704.065955056 142% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59117977528 101% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 9.0 6.24550561798 144% => OK
Article: 10.0 4.99550561798 200% => Less articles wanted as sentence beginning.
Subordination: 5.0 3.10617977528 161% => OK
Conjunction: 4.0 1.77640449438 225% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 7.0 4.38483146067 160% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 27.0 20.2370786517 133% => OK
Sentence length: 23.0 23.0359550562 100% => OK
Sentence length SD: 39.1369863902 60.3974514979 65% => OK
Chars per sentence: 119.148148148 118.986275619 100% => OK
Words per sentence: 23.4074074074 23.4991977007 100% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.77777777778 5.21951772744 72% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.97078651685 80% => OK
Language errors: 4.0 7.80617977528 51% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 12.0 10.2758426966 117% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 11.0 5.13820224719 214% => Less negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 4.83258426966 83% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.228969227243 0.243740707755 94% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0671030402891 0.0831039109588 81% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0600891575477 0.0758088955206 79% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.148072504313 0.150359130593 98% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0225117679922 0.0667264976115 34% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.2 14.1392134831 100% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 48.13 48.8420337079 99% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.92365168539 39% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.3 12.1743820225 101% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.54 12.1639044944 103% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.75 8.38706741573 104% => OK
difficult_words: 159.0 100.480337079 158% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 7.5 11.8971910112 63% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.2 11.2143820225 100% => OK
text_standard: 13.0 11.7820224719 110% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Better to have 5/6 paragraphs with 3/4 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:

para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: reason 4. address both of the views presented for reason 4 (optional)
para 6: conclusion.


Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.