"People's behavior is largely determined by forces not out of their own making."
We human beings are products of societies. To be more specific, our behaviors are more or less regulated by the codes or customs of the society. Nevertheless, it is our free will that makes the final decision whether it complies to the convention or not. In this sense, our behavior is always determined by ourselves.
The codes of the society do have a profound influence on our decision making. We were told to behave like a member of the society from our kindegartons about the proper way to talk with teachers, the impotance of being honest and the good habit to finish homework on time. All these are good behaviors appreciated by the society. We do them not only because of our own incentives but the instructions of others. When we grew older, we learned the customs that would make our lives more convenient like the convention to drive on our right side and to wait in line. We took all these for granted not only out of our advantages but also the guidance of morality and laws.
Though the outside forces give us strong guidance on what to behave, it is important to notice that we are still the one who make the decision ultimately. Even if we understand the laws that prohibits stealing, it is up to ourselves to steal or not. Same arguments apply to the codes of the society and the convention in our daily life. Why do we behave or not behave in that way? In essence, we do it because it satisfies our own interests. If we dare to challange the established law, we would be punished by the government and even go to jail. Likewise, if we cut in line, we would pay the price of the anxiety of our conscience and the criticize of others. The process of decision-making is so natural and even subconscious that sometimes we tend to forget the participation of our own will.
Nevertheless, we would easily notice the power of our own thinking when the established outside forces come into conflicts with our own will. After all, what makes those outside forces really count as the code of our behavior is to promise our own interests and the stability of the society. We abide by them because we acknowledge them. For instance, the custom of waiting in line is apparently beneficial for every one. But some of them either serves the benefits for the authority or even just our ignorance. The ethics of the church in the middle ages are more like ways serving the authority to control the innocent mass. Additionally, the traditional social role for women, especially in east Asia, where they are regarded as the product of men and supposed to commit themselves to the whole family rather than their personal careers is out of sheer ignorance. Under such circumstances, the behavior of our own decision is both necessary and profound. Scientist like Bruno and Galileo showed the power of their free will, challenged the eastablishment, though taken as dissidents and punished by the authority, finally debunked the myth of the church and sowed the seeds of Renaissance. If our behavior is really determined by outside forces, there would be no progress in our society at any rate, which clearly contradicts our experience.
In conclusion, the outside forces are widespread and influential to our behavior because they are good for us. Nevertheless, our own will is the only determinant to our behavior. Furthermore, the decision fighting against the establishment is essential for the prosperity of our society.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 5, column 637, Rule ID: A_INFINITVE[1]
Message: Probably a wrong construction: a/the + infinitive
...ce of the anxiety of our conscience and the criticize of others. The process of decision-maki...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, apparently, but, finally, furthermore, if, likewise, nevertheless, really, so, still, after all, for instance, in conclusion, at any rate, more or less
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 25.0 19.5258426966 128% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 10.0 12.4196629213 81% => OK
Conjunction : 23.0 14.8657303371 155% => OK
Relative clauses : 11.0 11.3162921348 97% => OK
Pronoun: 73.0 33.0505617978 221% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 90.0 58.6224719101 154% => OK
Nominalization: 18.0 12.9106741573 139% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2841.0 2235.4752809 127% => OK
No of words: 593.0 442.535393258 134% => OK
Chars per words: 4.79089376054 5.05705443957 95% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.93473315629 4.55969084622 108% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.81136807042 2.79657885939 101% => OK
Unique words: 276.0 215.323595506 128% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.465430016863 0.4932671777 94% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 918.9 704.065955056 131% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59117977528 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 16.0 6.24550561798 256% => Less pronouns wanted as sentence beginning.
Interrogative: 4.0 0.740449438202 540% => Less interrogative sentences wanted.
Article: 9.0 4.99550561798 180% => OK
Subordination: 8.0 3.10617977528 258% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 1.0 1.77640449438 56% => OK
Preposition: 6.0 4.38483146067 137% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 31.0 20.2370786517 153% => OK
Sentence length: 19.0 23.0359550562 82% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 49.1869165281 60.3974514979 81% => OK
Chars per sentence: 91.6451612903 118.986275619 77% => OK
Words per sentence: 19.1290322581 23.4991977007 81% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.06451612903 5.21951772744 97% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.97078651685 101% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 7.80617977528 13% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 18.0 10.2758426966 175% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 7.0 5.13820224719 136% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 6.0 4.83258426966 124% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.0876564925926 0.243740707755 36% => The similarity between the topic and the content is low.
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0315179339913 0.0831039109588 38% => Sentence topic similarity is low.
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0354506475558 0.0758088955206 47% => Sentences are similar to each other.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0644027047793 0.150359130593 43% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0297133978396 0.0667264976115 45% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 10.7 14.1392134831 76% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 60.65 48.8420337079 124% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.92365168539 111% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.5 12.1743820225 78% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.5 12.1639044944 86% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.93 8.38706741573 95% => OK
difficult_words: 126.0 100.480337079 125% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.0 11.8971910112 67% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.6 11.2143820225 86% => OK
text_standard: 8.0 11.7820224719 68% => The average readability is low. Need to imporve the language.
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.