People's behavior is largely determined by forces not of their own making.Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the claim. In developing and supporting your position, be sure to address the most compelling re

People's behavior vaires in their lives. People's lives, as my concern, are the procedures of recognizing themselves, then the others, later the society. So I contend thath people's behavior is not always determined by the forces not of their own. In that by the time we grow up, we may have different attidutes about ourselves as well as the envrionments which including others and the society. I will address my views as below.

To begin with, we do have the time that our behavior is influenced by the outside forces. When we were young ,we had to imitate the others like adults to behave ourselves to meet the standard of a cultivated child. That's why we go to kindergartens and schools. We learned how to eat with knives and forks or chopstiks rather than with our hands. Likewise, we learned to study like a student in that this habitat is very important that could benefit us for whole lives. So under these occassions, we have to be influcenced by the others in that we nee the guidance to show us what is right ,suitable and proper. Even when we grow up, we still need to learn something that we haven't known befroe. Like I taught lots of my foeign friends to use chopsticks, they were my students as Chineses food leanrers.

We can learn thus we can get more exprince of our lives, the more we learn from the others, the more we could think about the world. As Shopenhauer said, everyone recognize the limit of the eyesight as the end of the world. It is true that we should not be so near-sighted, as we can think and analyze, that we could make our own minds.

Thus, on the other hand, people are not always influenced by the others on the matter of behavior. If out ancestor behaved the same as the other animals when they met the bush on fire lightened by the thunders, we may still at the primitive society, let alone other advanced technology in that we did not find the use of the fire was so amzaing. Likewise, not everyone could figure out the theory of Gravity when hit by apples on the tree, while Newton was so great and abnormal at his time to argued his theory. Moreover, if not the people like Galileo or Coppernicus insisted on the Heliocentric, the astronomy would be still under the govern of religion. We would not gain so many archievements like today. It is significant to be not forced by other's behaviors as people may not hold the truth which is usually in the hands of minority.

In additon, someone may argue that the Newtons or Einsteins were also cultivated by others, that's the basic background of them. It is true even the Einstein admitted that he was on the shoulders of giants. While the individual thingking is the more important one to be taken into consideration.As the most clever primates, the human-beings benefit from individual thinking a lot like I mentioned above.Thus I should admitt that everyone need guidance of the others even when they grow up, while we are totally different inside as we have various minds, that consists this colorful world. So the behavior of people influcenced between the inside and ousdide is not controversial as that is the cleverness of us. We could figure out the idea on oursevles.

In all, people should not always follow the others. Like me , I have stable work and family while I still find myself need to learn.

Votes
Average: 5 (1 vote)
Essay Categories

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 109, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...y the outside forces. When we were young ,we had to imitate the others like adults...
^^
Line 3, column 216, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: That's
...eet the standard of a cultivated child. Thats why we go to kindergartens and schools....
^^^^^
Line 3, column 589, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...ee the guidance to show us what is right ,suitable and proper. Even when we grow u...
^^
Line 3, column 675, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: haven't
...e still need to learn something that we havent known befroe. Like I taught lots of my ...
^^^^^^
Line 7, column 523, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...his time to argued his theory. Moreover, if not the people like Galileo or Copper...
^^
Line 7, column 636, Rule ID: A_INFINITVE[1]
Message: Probably a wrong construction: a/the + infinitive
...ric, the astronomy would be still under the govern of religion. We would not gain so many ...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 93, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: that's
...nsteins were also cultivated by others, thats the basic background of them. It is tru...
^^^^^
Line 9, column 207, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “While” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...that he was on the shoulders of giants. While the individual thingking is the more i...
^^^^^
Line 9, column 212, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...he was on the shoulders of giants. While the individual thingking is the more imp...
^^
Line 9, column 296, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: As
...tant one to be taken into consideration.As the most clever primates, the human-bei...
^^
Line 9, column 404, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: Thus
...l thinking a lot like I mentioned above.Thus I should admitt that everyone need guid...
^^^^
Line 9, column 404, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Thus,
...l thinking a lot like I mentioned above.Thus I should admitt that everyone need guid...
^^^^
Line 11, column 60, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...ld not always follow the others. Like me , I have stable work and family while I s...
^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, if, likewise, may, moreover, so, still, then, thus, well, while, as well as, it is true, to begin with, on the other hand

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 25.0 19.5258426966 128% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 21.0 12.4196629213 169% => OK
Conjunction : 11.0 14.8657303371 74% => OK
Relative clauses : 21.0 11.3162921348 186% => OK
Pronoun: 78.0 33.0505617978 236% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 88.0 58.6224719101 150% => OK
Nominalization: 3.0 12.9106741573 23% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2725.0 2235.4752809 122% => OK
No of words: 591.0 442.535393258 134% => OK
Chars per words: 4.61082910321 5.05705443957 91% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.93056706295 4.55969084622 108% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.58942454973 2.79657885939 93% => OK
Unique words: 271.0 215.323595506 126% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.458544839255 0.4932671777 93% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 847.8 704.065955056 120% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.4 1.59117977528 88% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 19.0 6.24550561798 304% => Less pronouns wanted as sentence beginning.
Article: 4.0 4.99550561798 80% => OK
Subordination: 10.0 3.10617977528 322% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 0.0 1.77640449438 0% => OK
Preposition: 7.0 4.38483146067 160% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 29.0 20.2370786517 143% => OK
Sentence length: 20.0 23.0359550562 87% => OK
Sentence length SD: 67.4961574632 60.3974514979 112% => OK
Chars per sentence: 93.9655172414 118.986275619 79% => OK
Words per sentence: 20.3793103448 23.4991977007 87% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.37931034483 5.21951772744 84% => OK
Paragraphs: 6.0 4.97078651685 121% => OK
Language errors: 13.0 7.80617977528 167% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 12.0 10.2758426966 117% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 5.13820224719 97% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 12.0 4.83258426966 248% => Less facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.0853316711559 0.243740707755 35% => The similarity between the topic and the content is low.
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0348458771112 0.0831039109588 42% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0511386898729 0.0758088955206 67% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0574540890051 0.150359130593 38% => Maybe some paragraphs are off the topic.
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0508192102973 0.0667264976115 76% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 10.5 14.1392134831 74% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 68.1 48.8420337079 139% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.92365168539 39% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 8.7 12.1743820225 71% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 9.46 12.1639044944 78% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.54 8.38706741573 90% => OK
difficult_words: 109.0 100.480337079 108% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 6.5 11.8971910112 55% => Linsear_write_formula is low.
gunning_fog: 10.0 11.2143820225 89% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 11.7820224719 76% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.