Some people believe that increasing violence in the media is the cause of increasing violence in our society, especially among children. Others believe that children's peer groups and parental role models are a much more influence on children's behavior
Some people believe that increasing violence in the media is the cause of increasing violence in our society, especially among children. Others believe that children's peer groups and parental role models are a much powerful influence on children's behaviour. I believe blaming media for the cause of violence in our society is not completely valid, and that too as specified in the issue, especially among children. What I believe is, children's peer groups and/or parents play a much powerful influence in children's behaviour. I would like to explain the reason behind it in the following paragraphs.
The reason I believe that children's parents, peers, relatives, and surrounding environment has a much powerful influence on children's behaviour than any type of media because children are connected with the individuals around then more than any kind of media. They learn from their surroundings more compared to what they learn or gain from the media. The environment in the house and/or surroundings, and the way their parents behave in front of a children has a big impact on the nature/behaviour of children with his/her surroundings and/or peers and relatives. They learn what they see and gain from their parents, teachers, and peers, since their childhood till they are grown ups.
Children grow up and learn about things and gain knowledge more from their surroundings and the environment which they have in their respective homes and families than from media. Children are not introduced to media upto a certain age. They may not understand the things displayed or viewed in different kinds of media, rather than that, they would learn more from what they could see practically happening in their surrounding environment and the way everyone around them behaves in front of them. Even peers play an important role in shaping of the child's behavior as much as parents and teachers do. It doesn't matter how well parents take care of their children and teach them to behave well in front of the world, but if peers with whom they accompany much of the time in schools/colleges are not well behaved, then children are more likely to learn from them and not behave well. It is parents' and teacher's duty to teach their children how to behave in the society, how to respect elders, how to avoid any kind of violence in our society.
However, I would also like to add that, even media might play some role in shaping of the behaviour of children and the violence causing the our society upto some point. Nowadays, their has been an increasing misuse of different media. Especially electronic media, they show many negative news and spread messages which are not suitable for our society and our children. They may have bad effect in our society, resulting in wrong behaviour and violence of different kinds. But I still believe parental role models play important role in shaping children's behaviour than media does.
Hence, according to me, children's peer groups and parental role models are a much powerful influence on children's behaviour.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 448, Rule ID: A_PLURAL[1]
Message: Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean 'a child' or simply 'children'?
Suggestion: a child; children
...he way their parents behave in front of a children has a big impact on the nature/behaviou...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 608, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: doesn't
... as much as parents and teachers do. It doesnt matter how well parents take care of th...
^^^^^^
Line 7, column 138, Rule ID: DT_PRP[1]
Message: Possible typo. Did you mean 'the' or 'our'?
Suggestion: the; our
...ur of children and the violence causing the our society upto some point. Nowadays, thei...
^^^^^^^
Discourse Markers used:
['also', 'but', 'hence', 'however', 'if', 'may', 'so', 'still', 'then', 'well', 'kind of']
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance in Part of Speech:
Nouns: 0.250909090909 0.240241500013 104% => OK
Verbs: 0.161818181818 0.157235817809 103% => OK
Adjectives: 0.0527272727273 0.0880659088768 60% => OK
Adverbs: 0.0654545454545 0.0497285424764 132% => OK
Pronouns: 0.0781818181818 0.0444667217837 176% => Less pronouns wanted. Try not to use 'you, I, they, he...' as the subject of a sentence
Prepositions: 0.136363636364 0.12292977631 111% => OK
Participles: 0.0345454545455 0.0406280797675 85% => OK
Conjunctions: 2.65352445626 2.79330140395 95% => OK
Infinitives: 0.02 0.030933414821 65% => OK
Particles: 0.00181818181818 0.0016655270985 109% => OK
Determiners: 0.0709090909091 0.0997080785238 71% => OK
Modal_auxiliary: 0.0127272727273 0.0249443105267 51% => OK
WH_determiners: 0.02 0.0148568991511 135% => OK
Vocabulary words and sentences:
No of characters: 3051.0 2732.02544248 112% => OK
No of words: 505.0 452.878318584 112% => OK
Chars per words: 6.04158415842 6.0361032391 100% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.74048574033 4.58838876751 103% => OK
words length more than 5 chars: 0.354455445545 0.366273622748 97% => OK
words length more than 6 chars: 0.263366336634 0.280924506359 94% => OK
words length more than 7 chars: 0.211881188119 0.200843997647 105% => OK
words length more than 8 chars: 0.134653465347 0.132149295362 102% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.65352445626 2.79330140395 95% => OK
Unique words: 190.0 219.290929204 87% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.376237623762 0.48968727796 77% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
Word variations: 42.6722078965 55.4138127331 77% => OK
How many sentences: 21.0 20.6194690265 102% => OK
Sentence length: 24.0476190476 23.380412469 103% => OK
Sentence length SD: 62.538296657 59.4972553346 105% => OK
Chars per sentence: 145.285714286 141.124799967 103% => OK
Words per sentence: 24.0476190476 23.380412469 103% => OK
Discourse Markers: 0.52380952381 0.674092028746 78% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.94800884956 101% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 5.21349557522 58% => OK
Readability: 50.384252711 51.4728631049 98% => OK
Elegance: 1.38095238095 1.64882698954 84% => OK
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.525741009622 0.391690518653 134% => OK
Sentence sentence coherence: 0.130724066939 0.123202303941 106% => OK
Sentence sentence coherence SD: 0.0944363145054 0.077325440228 122% => OK
Sentence paragraph coherence: 0.542273992038 0.547984918172 99% => OK
Sentence paragraph coherence SD: 0.167025659683 0.149214159877 112% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.214223750951 0.161403998019 133% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.143475760768 0.0892212321368 161% => OK
Paragraph paragraph coherence: 0.402770675119 0.385218514788 105% => OK
Paragraph paragraph coherence SD: 0.164842818902 0.0692045440612 238% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.365038418824 0.275328986314 133% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.170558184303 0.0653680567796 261% => OK
Task Achievement:
Sentences with positive sentiment : 11.0 10.4325221239 105% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 7.0 5.30420353982 132% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.88274336283 61% => OK
Positive topic words: 11.0 7.22455752212 152% => OK
Negative topic words: 7.0 3.66592920354 191% => OK
Neutral topic words: 2.0 2.70907079646 74% => OK
Total topic words: 20.0 13.5995575221 147% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
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Rates: 62.5 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.75 Out of 6
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Note: This is not the final score. The e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.