Some people believe that increasing violence in the media is the cause of increasing violence in our society, especially among children. Others believe that children's peer groups and parental role models are a much more influence on children's behavior

People blaming to media that this is the instigator of violence in the society, especially among the children, while the other group of thinkers argue that instead of media children’s more influence to their surroundings i.e. their parents and peers. I would like to support the bunch of thinkers who believe that parents and peer provide more crucial role in children’s behavior rather than anything else. I will provide some bullets to strengthen my statement as following paragraphs.
Initially, I would like to bring the attention on a statement “Home is the first school and parents is the first teacher”, as according to the well know axiom that a child will start the learning from day first when he born from their family and the members of the family are their first teacher as they will teach them how to reach, how to behave and how to distinguish among a bad and good. Children’s grabs the things from their parents and peers-whatever the behavior parents is showing in front of children’s they are trying to mimic the same as parents are the first role model of children’s. Rather than blaming to media to cause of increasing the violence in our society we should focus on our behavior and teaching what we are giving to our kids.

In addition, we should be very attentive about the peers of our kids. We should always vigilance about the company in which our kids spending their time. As we know that kids inherent the behaviors and habits of their peers, so they should be very aware in selection of their company. If a kid will spend time with a bad and violent company, it will reflect in his own behavior as well. As parents, we should guide to our kids to choose the company of peers, it’s our moral responsibility to guide our kids to select a benevolent company. Media is not playing any role to guide a kid to select good or bad company. If a kid is having a vigor company then he will also try to become aggravate. For instance, a boy of hardly three year old in my neighbor who is very aggressive as he is playing with teen agers kids who always use to fight and use abusive language. As he mimic them and his parents is not showing any attention on him, consequently this malevolent activity showing in his behavior. This kid is not older enough so he can understand the things which are showing in media, he is absorbing the things from his surroundings.

Although, media also playing a vital role in social activities. Some of the media, especially the electronic media twist a news so badly and broadcast it, as result it stimulate unwanted activities around the society. In some instance we can blame to media to increase the violence around us as they will broadcast a ambiguous news and give negative impact on children’s as they are not mature enough to judge what is the reality, but as a parents we are the navigator of our kids and we should enlighten their path.

In conclusion, in a word owning from aforementioned reasonable cause and elucidation description from previous paragraph, I will good to draw a conclusion that the parents is the responsible for their children’s behavior rather than media or anything else. The media will influence the children’s to some level but it can be totally avoidable with parent’s attention and teaching.

Votes
Average: 6.6 (1 vote)
Essay Categories

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 606, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...e as parents are the first role model of children's. Rather than blaming to ...
^^
Line 4, column 621, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “If” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...de a kid to select good or bad company. If a kid is having a vigor company then he...
^^
Line 4, column 831, Rule ID: USE_TO_VERB[1]
Message: Did you mean 'used'?
Suggestion: used
...playing with teen agers kids who always use to fight and use abusive language. As h...
^^^
Line 6, column 1, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “Although” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...g the things from his surroundings. Although, media also playing a vital role in soc...
^^^^^^^^
Line 6, column 65, Rule ID: SOME_OF_THE[1]
Message: Simply use 'some'.
Suggestion: Some
...ying a vital role in social activities. Some of the media, especially the electronic media ...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 6, column 169, Rule ID: IT_VBZ[1]
Message: Did you mean 'stimulates'?
Suggestion: stimulates
...so badly and broadcast it, as result it stimulate unwanted activities around the society....
^^^^^^^^^
Line 6, column 316, Rule ID: EN_A_VS_AN
Message: Use 'an' instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
Suggestion: an
...olence around us as they will broadcast a ambiguous news and give negative impact...
^
Line 6, column 444, Rule ID: A_PLURAL[1]
Message: Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean 'a parent' or simply 'parents'?
Suggestion: a parent; parents
...gh to judge what is the reality, but as a parents we are the navigator of our kids and we...
^^^^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, consequently, first, if, so, then, well, while, for instance, in addition, in conclusion

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 23.0 19.5258426966 118% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 20.0 12.4196629213 161% => OK
Conjunction : 21.0 14.8657303371 141% => OK
Relative clauses : 12.0 11.3162921348 106% => OK
Pronoun: 67.0 33.0505617978 203% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 76.0 58.6224719101 130% => OK
Nominalization: 17.0 12.9106741573 132% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2776.0 2235.4752809 124% => OK
No of words: 577.0 442.535393258 130% => OK
Chars per words: 4.81109185442 5.05705443957 95% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.90110439584 4.55969084622 107% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.88962774203 2.79657885939 103% => OK
Unique words: 239.0 215.323595506 111% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.414211438475 0.4932671777 84% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 855.0 704.065955056 121% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59117977528 94% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 11.0 6.24550561798 176% => OK
Article: 2.0 4.99550561798 40% => OK
Subordination: 8.0 3.10617977528 258% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 1.0 1.77640449438 56% => OK
Preposition: 4.0 4.38483146067 91% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 21.0 20.2370786517 104% => OK
Sentence length: 27.0 23.0359550562 117% => OK
Sentence length SD: 85.279638719 60.3974514979 141% => OK
Chars per sentence: 132.19047619 118.986275619 111% => OK
Words per sentence: 27.4761904762 23.4991977007 117% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.71428571429 5.21951772744 90% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.97078651685 101% => OK
Language errors: 8.0 7.80617977528 102% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 6.0 10.2758426966 58% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 8.0 5.13820224719 156% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 7.0 4.83258426966 145% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.372157767122 0.243740707755 153% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.112114620188 0.0831039109588 135% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.118664525427 0.0758088955206 157% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.255416505448 0.150359130593 170% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.125264180327 0.0667264976115 188% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 15.0 14.1392134831 106% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 52.53 48.8420337079 108% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.92365168539 111% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.6 12.1743820225 103% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.91 12.1639044944 90% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.93 8.38706741573 95% => OK
difficult_words: 108.0 100.480337079 107% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 14.0 11.8971910112 118% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.8 11.2143820225 114% => OK
text_standard: 13.0 11.7820224719 110% => OK
What are above readability scores?

---------------------

Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.