The bar chart below shows the percentage of Australian men and women in different age groups who did regular physical activity in 2010.

Essay topics:

The bar chart below shows the percentage of Australian men and women in different age groups who did regular physical activity in 2010.

The bar chart illustrates the percentage of men and women of different ages who did physical activities regularly in 2010 in Australia.

Overall, the percentage of female doing regular physical activities was more outstanding than those of male except for the ages from 15 to 24. In addition, the gulf between them became bigger as the age got older from 25 to 44, and the gap began to diminish after 45 years old.

The percentage of women doing regular physical activities was 47.7% between 15 and 24 years old. And the older women were, the larger percentage of them was engaged in such regular physical activities until 45 to 55 years old, which was up to 53.3%. then, when it comes to 55 years old, the percentage began to fall, and only 47.1 of women older than 65 years old were engaged in regular physical activities, which is the least among all ages.

With respect to men, up to 52.8% of men aged from 15 to 24 did regular physical activities, which is the largest among all ages. then it started to shrink as men got older, then it reached to the bottom at 39.5% for men between 35 and 44 years old. However, the percentage increased again for men older than 45 years old, with 46.7% at the age more than 65 years old, which was almost the same as women.

Votes
Average: 6.7 (1 vote)

Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
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Suggestion:
...es regularly in 2010 in Australia. Overall, the percentage of female doing ...
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Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
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...an to diminish after 45 years old. The percentage of women doing regular ph...
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Suggestion: Then
...to 55 years old, which was up to 53.3%. then, when it comes to 55 years old, the per...
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Line 21, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...which is the least among all ages. With respect to men, up to 52.8% of men ...
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Suggestion: Then
...s, which is the largest among all ages. then it started to shrink as men got older, ...
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Transition Words or Phrases used:
however, if, then, except for, in addition, with respect to

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 9.0 7.0 129% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 0.0 1.00243902439 0% => OK
Conjunction : 6.0 6.8 88% => OK
Relative clauses : 6.0 3.15609756098 190% => OK
Pronoun: 6.0 5.60731707317 107% => OK
Preposition: 42.0 33.7804878049 124% => OK
Nominalization: 1.0 3.97073170732 25% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1066.0 965.302439024 110% => OK
No of words: 232.0 196.424390244 118% => OK
Chars per words: 4.59482758621 4.92477711251 93% => OK
Fourth root words length: 3.90276135726 3.73543355544 104% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.33152603979 2.65546596893 88% => OK
Unique words: 105.0 106.607317073 98% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.452586206897 0.547539520022 83% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 306.9 283.868780488 108% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.3 1.45097560976 90% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 0.0 1.53170731707 0% => OK
Article: 7.0 4.33902439024 161% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 1.07073170732 93% => OK
Conjunction: 3.0 0.482926829268 621% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 4.0 3.36585365854 119% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 9.0 8.94146341463 101% => OK
Sentence length: 25.0 22.4926829268 111% => OK
Sentence length SD: 25.2312759081 43.030603864 59% => The essay contains lots of sentences with the similar length. More sentence varieties wanted.
Chars per sentence: 118.444444444 112.824112599 105% => OK
Words per sentence: 25.7777777778 22.9334400587 112% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.55555555556 5.23603664747 125% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 3.83414634146 104% => OK
Language errors: 5.0 1.69756097561 295% => Less language errors wanted.
Sentences with positive sentiment : 6.0 3.70975609756 162% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 0.0 1.13902439024 0% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.09268292683 73% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.314501489442 0.215688989381 146% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.186299886345 0.103423049105 180% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.186975757389 0.0843802449381 222% => The coherence between sentences is low.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.292172591551 0.15604864568 187% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.230819080958 0.0819641961636 282% => More connections among paragraphs wanted.

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.1 13.2329268293 99% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 71.48 61.2550243902 117% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.51609756098 48% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.5 10.3012195122 92% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 9.64 11.4140731707 84% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 6.71 8.06136585366 83% => OK
difficult_words: 27.0 40.7170731707 66% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 11.4329268293 96% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.0 10.9970731707 109% => OK
text_standard: 10.0 11.0658536585 90% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Rates: 67.4157303371 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 6.0 Out of 9
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.