The bar chart shows the percentage of school children learning to play different musical instrument in 2005 2010 2015

Essay topics:

The bar chart shows the percentage of school children learning to play different musical instrument in 2005, 2010, 2015.

The bar chart compares statistical data in the percentage of four different musical instruments were played by schoolers over the eleven-year period.

A closer look at the diagram highlights the fact that over the period shown, figures for Piano and Guitar always dominated the two others (Drums and Violin). Furthermore, while Piano's, Guitar's and Drum's percentage witnessed an upward trend during the period, the opposite was true for violin.

To start with, both Piano and Guitar figures in 2005 reach 10 percent and experienced a sharply jump over the whole period. In addition, in 2010, the percentage of musical instrument using of Guitar was lower than Piano, whereas the opposite was true in 2015.

On the other hand, there was a gradually drop in the proportion of Violins' learners from 10 percent to a half. Aside from, it is undebatable that the percentage of Drums learned by students almost saw a slightly climb between 2005 and 2015 at nearly 10 percent.

Votes
Average: 7 (4 votes)

Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 5, column 87, Rule ID: A_RB_NN[1]
Message: You used an adverb ('sharply') instead an adjective, or a noun ('jump') instead of another adjective.
...n 2005 reach 10 percent and experienced a sharply jump over the whole period. In addition, in ...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 30, Rule ID: A_RB_NN[1]
Message: You used an adverb ('gradually') instead an adjective, or a noun ('drop') instead of another adjective.
...n 2015. On the other hand, there was a gradually drop in the proportion of Violins learners f...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 202, Rule ID: A_RB_NN[1]
Message: You used an adverb ('slightly') instead an adjective, or a noun ('climb') instead of another adjective.
...of Drums learned by students almost saw a slightly climb between 2005 and 2015 at nearly 10 perc...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
furthermore, if, look, whereas, while, in addition, to start with, on the other hand

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 6.0 7.0 86% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 0.0 1.00243902439 0% => OK
Conjunction : 6.0 6.8 88% => OK
Relative clauses : 2.0 3.15609756098 63% => OK
Pronoun: 3.0 5.60731707317 54% => OK
Preposition: 28.0 33.7804878049 83% => OK
Nominalization: 3.0 3.97073170732 76% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 814.0 965.302439024 84% => OK
No of words: 161.0 196.424390244 82% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.05590062112 4.92477711251 103% => OK
Fourth root words length: 3.56210296601 3.73543355544 95% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.60069758843 2.65546596893 98% => OK
Unique words: 101.0 106.607317073 95% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.627329192547 0.547539520022 115% => OK
syllable_count: 235.8 283.868780488 83% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.45097560976 103% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 1.0 1.53170731707 65% => OK
Article: 4.0 4.33902439024 92% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 1.07073170732 93% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 0.482926829268 0% => OK
Preposition: 5.0 3.36585365854 149% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 7.0 8.94146341463 78% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 23.0 22.4926829268 102% => OK
Sentence length SD: 14.993876301 43.030603864 35% => The essay contains lots of sentences with the similar length. More sentence varieties wanted.
Chars per sentence: 116.285714286 112.824112599 103% => OK
Words per sentence: 23.0 22.9334400587 100% => OK
Discourse Markers: 12.0 5.23603664747 229% => Less transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 4.0 3.83414634146 104% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 1.69756097561 177% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 5.0 3.70975609756 135% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 0.0 1.13902439024 0% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.09268292683 49% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.218899472637 0.215688989381 101% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.100064316864 0.103423049105 97% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.105069478489 0.0843802449381 125% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.142883632993 0.15604864568 92% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.100713760157 0.0819641961636 123% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.9 13.2329268293 105% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 56.59 61.2550243902 92% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.51609756098 48% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.1 10.3012195122 108% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.36 11.4140731707 108% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.09 8.06136585366 113% => OK
difficult_words: 44.0 40.7170731707 108% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 11.4329268293 96% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.2 10.9970731707 102% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 11.0658536585 99% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Rates: 78.6516853933 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 7.0 Out of 9
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.