The two pie charts below show the online shopping sales for retail sectors in Canada in 2005 and 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Essay topics:

The two pie charts below show the online shopping sales for retail sectors in Canada in 2005 and 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The first pie-chart represent proportion of online sales for four sector in 2005 in Canada while second illustrate sales in those sector in same country but during 2010.

Overall, it can be clearly noticed that all the four sector have been changed drastically from 2005 to 2010. While the portion of electronic and appliance and home furnishing significantly decreased, the remaining two sector rose up.

In 2005, the percentage of electronic and appliance was 35% ,but it plunge by 5% after 5 year. Whereas the proportion of home furnishing also went down into 15 % in 2010 from 22% between 2005.

On the other hand, remaining two sector that is video games and food, beverage uplift moderately. There was increased in video games, which increased by a small minority percentage in 2010 from 22% in 2005.

Futuermore, in 2005 the online sales of food and beverage was 18% only. However, the percentage reached nearly quarter percent i.e 23% in year 2010.

Votes
Average: 6 (2 votes)

Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 67, Rule ID: CD_NN[1]
Message: Possible agreement error. The noun 'sector' seems to be countable, so consider using: 'sectors'.
Suggestion: sectors
...ent proportion of online sales for four sector in 2005 in Canada while second illustra...
^^^^^^
Line 1, column 125, Rule ID: THIS_NNS[2]
Message: Did you mean 'this sector' or 'those sectors'?
Suggestion: this sector; those sectors
...Canada while second illustrate sales in those sector in same country but during 2010. O...
^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 219, Rule ID: CD_NN[1]
Message: Possible agreement error. The noun 'sector' seems to be countable, so consider using: 'sectors'.
Suggestion: sectors
...nificantly decreased, the remaining two sector rose up. In 2005, the percentage o...
^^^^^^
Line 9, column 60, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...tage of electronic and appliance was 35% ,but it plunge by 5% after 5 year. Wherea...
^^
Line 9, column 69, Rule ID: IT_VBZ[1]
Message: Did you mean 'plunges'?
Suggestion: plunges
...lectronic and appliance was 35% ,but it plunge by 5% after 5 year. Whereas the proport...
^^^^^^
Line 9, column 96, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “Whereas” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
... 35% ,but it plunge by 5% after 5 year. Whereas the proportion of home furnishing also ...
^^^^^^^
Line 13, column 34, Rule ID: CD_NN[1]
Message: Possible agreement error. The noun 'sector' seems to be countable, so consider using: 'sectors'.
Suggestion: sectors
.... On the other hand, remaining two sector that is video games and food, beverage ...
^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, however, if, second, so, whereas, while, on the other hand

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 6.0 7.0 86% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 1.0 1.00243902439 100% => OK
Conjunction : 7.0 6.8 103% => OK
Relative clauses : 3.0 3.15609756098 95% => OK
Pronoun: 6.0 5.60731707317 107% => OK
Preposition: 29.0 33.7804878049 86% => OK
Nominalization: 5.0 3.97073170732 126% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 825.0 965.302439024 85% => OK
No of words: 160.0 196.424390244 81% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.15625 4.92477711251 105% => OK
Fourth root words length: 3.55655882008 3.73543355544 95% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.61380747313 2.65546596893 98% => OK
Unique words: 100.0 106.607317073 94% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.625 0.547539520022 114% => OK
syllable_count: 233.1 283.868780488 82% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.45097560976 103% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 1.0 1.53170731707 65% => OK
Article: 4.0 4.33902439024 92% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 1.07073170732 93% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 0.482926829268 207% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 3.0 3.36585365854 89% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 9.0 8.94146341463 101% => OK
Sentence length: 17.0 22.4926829268 76% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 27.3270092052 43.030603864 64% => OK
Chars per sentence: 91.6666666667 112.824112599 81% => OK
Words per sentence: 17.7777777778 22.9334400587 78% => OK
Discourse Markers: 8.44444444444 5.23603664747 161% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 3.83414634146 130% => Less paragraphs wanted.
Language errors: 7.0 1.69756097561 412% => Less language errors wanted.
Sentences with positive sentiment : 4.0 3.70975609756 108% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 0.0 1.13902439024 0% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 5.0 4.09268292683 122% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.227620005556 0.215688989381 106% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0897723291025 0.103423049105 87% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0753793540086 0.0843802449381 89% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.13086952257 0.15604864568 84% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0820218589616 0.0819641961636 100% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.8 13.2329268293 89% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 62.68 61.2550243902 102% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.51609756098 48% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 8.7 10.3012195122 84% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.35 11.4140731707 108% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.03 8.06136585366 100% => OK
difficult_words: 36.0 40.7170731707 88% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 11.4329268293 96% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.8 10.9970731707 80% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 11.0658536585 81% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Maximum four paragraphs wanted.

Rates: 73.0337078652 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 6.5 Out of 9
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.