In some countries, some people think that women should have equality with men, in particular equal rights to work as police officers or serve in the army. Others think women are not suitable for such jobs. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.
The whole world is turning to egalitarian society in this modern context. Therefore, some people advocate that women deserve equal rights to men in terms of working in the defence system of a nation. By contrast, others claim that females are not the right choice for the jobs in army and police. Here, I would like to account for both sides with my perception.
There are many points to shore up the former view. First and foremost,
modern women have ability to rub shoulder with men in every field. Gone are the days when women were supposed to be the weaker members of society. But at present, modern women are well educated, advance and active in every field. To demonstrate, females such as Kalpna Chawla, Sania Mirza and Kiran Bedi have already shown their great achievements in aviation, sports and police department. Hence, allowing females to work in the defence sector can promote the sense of equality and unity among both genders and they should be permitted to work in army and police. In addition, giving females opportunity to work in defence will uplift their self-esteem, dignity and respect in the modern societies. On the contrary, others have conflicting views.
Numerous points can be mentioned to endorse the latter view. Initially, women are generally, considered physically less strong and more sensitive as compared to men. Therefore, doing jobs in defence management is not a piece of cake for women. What is more, jobs in army and police require strong temperament and ability to take brave decisions without becoming emotional. But, females are neither mentally strong as men nor brave enough to deal with situations like war. This is the reason why they do not suit to such professions.
In my notion, both aspects have their own significance. Undeniably, both genders have their own set of individuality and their abilities vary in distinct sectors. However, freedom given to women for joining army or police will enhance value of females and disappear the differences on behalf of gender. Therefore, they should be given chance to step forward for defence jobs.
To recapitulate, nature has blessed equal empowerment to both men and women. It is unjustifiable to underestimate the capabilities of female without offering them a chance to prove themselves.
Comments
Essay evaluation report
The whole world is turning to egalitarian society
The whole world is turning to an egalitarian society
flaws:
need some compound/complex sentences, look:
Relative clauses : 3.0 7.30460921844 41% => More relative clauses wanted.
Subordination: 0.0 2.10420841683 0% => More adverbial clause wanted.
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Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 6.5 out of 9
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 1 2
No. of Sentences: 24 15
No. of Words: 377 350
No. of Characters: 1859 1500
No. of Different Words: 209 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.406 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.931 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.555 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 138 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 96 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 54 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 37 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 15.708 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 5.412 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.5 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.259 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.465 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.056 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 126, Rule ID: AFFORD_VB[1]
Message: This verb is used with the infinitive: 'to equal'
Suggestion: to equal
...some people advocate that women deserve equal rights to men in terms of working in th...
^^^^^
Line 4, column 71, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... up the former view. First and foremost, modern women have ability to rub shoulde...
^^^
Line 5, column 73, Rule ID: MASS_AGREEMENT[1]
Message: Consider using third-person verb forms for singular and mass nouns: 'is'.
Suggestion: is
... shoulder with men in every field. Gone are the days when women were supposed to be...
^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, first, hence, however, if, so, therefore, well, in addition, such as, on the contrary, what is more
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 16.0 13.1623246493 122% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 7.0 7.85571142285 89% => OK
Conjunction : 18.0 10.4138276553 173% => OK
Relative clauses : 3.0 7.30460921844 41% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 18.0 24.0651302605 75% => OK
Preposition: 58.0 41.998997996 138% => OK
Nominalization: 15.0 8.3376753507 180% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1926.0 1615.20841683 119% => OK
No of words: 377.0 315.596192385 119% => OK
Chars per words: 5.10875331565 5.12529762239 100% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.4064143971 4.20363070211 105% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.68299994351 2.80592935109 96% => OK
Unique words: 211.0 176.041082164 120% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.559681697613 0.561755894193 100% => OK
syllable_count: 621.9 506.74238477 123% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.60771543086 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 4.0 5.43587174349 74% => OK
Article: 1.0 2.52805611222 40% => OK
Subordination: 0.0 2.10420841683 0% => More adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 1.0 0.809619238477 124% => OK
Preposition: 6.0 4.76152304609 126% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 24.0 16.0721442886 149% => OK
Sentence length: 15.0 20.2975951904 74% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 34.0734245988 49.4020404114 69% => OK
Chars per sentence: 80.25 106.682146367 75% => OK
Words per sentence: 15.7083333333 20.7667163134 76% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.33333333333 7.06120827912 61% => OK
Paragraphs: 6.0 4.38176352705 137% => Less paragraphs wanted.
Language errors: 3.0 5.01903807615 60% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 16.0 8.67935871743 184% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 3.9879759519 100% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 3.4128256513 117% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.283612450691 0.244688304435 116% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0729830386382 0.084324248473 87% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0634513885079 0.0667982634062 95% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.132705212778 0.151304729494 88% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0798000799263 0.056905535591 140% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 10.5 13.0946893788 80% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 56.25 50.2224549098 112% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.44779559118 118% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.1 11.3001002004 81% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.06 12.4159519038 97% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.53 8.58950901804 99% => OK
difficult_words: 99.0 78.4519038076 126% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 6.5 9.78957915832 66% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.0 10.1190380762 79% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 10.7795591182 83% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Maximum five paragraphs wanted.
Rates: 78.6516853933 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 7.0 Out of 9
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.