What discovery in the last 100 years has been most beneficial for people in your country?

Essay topics:

What discovery in the last 100 years has been most beneficial for people in your country?

Kazakhstan, situated in the Central Asia, has recently been ranked among the World’s top fifty developed and competitive countries. Initially, this post-Soviet country, which had its independence from the USSR in 1991, had had collapsed industry as well as economy; however, discovery of oil deposits in Western Kazakhstan in early twentieth century has contributed to establish strong, modern and independent Kazakhstan.
After the dissolution of the USSR, economies of most post-Soviet countries stagnated. Kazakhstan’s economy, in contrast, started to prosper due to the fact that such Western countries as the USA, Canada, France and etc. have heavily invested in this newly independent country’s oil industry. This economic support from the West facilitated to develop Kazakhstan’s infrastructure as well as provided significant support for establishing middle- and small-scaled businesses in this Central Asian country. This, which in turn, has substantially increased Kazakhstan citizens’ standard of living giving opportunity to consume products as well as majority Europeans, to drive American and Japanese vehicles and to study at World’s top universities. Moreover, Kazakhstan’s government has become capable of organizing international occasions: OSCE summit in 2010, Asian weightlifting championship in 2013, International EXPO 2017 in 2017 and etc., which has contributed to elevate in many Global rankings.
Focusing Kazakhstan’s economy vastly on oil industry, on the other hand, has recently triggered some negative consequences in its economy since there has been crisis in Global “black gold” market resulting in slump in oil price. There was continuous devaluation in Kazakhstan’s National currency – Tenge - since the country’s incomes have notably decreased. The government, nevertheless, has initiated several state programs to diversify its economy. EXPO 2017 in Astana, the capital, for instance, invited over 100 countries including the USA, Canada, Germany, to illustrate their breakthroughs in renewable energy in order to obtain those new technologies to utilize in Kazakhstan.
There have been many discoveries in Kazakhstan contributed to attain its place in World arena; nevertheless, Kazakhstan’s oil deposits are considered to be that what mostly helped for this Central Asian country to prosper.

Votes
Average: 8.9 (1 vote)

Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 225, Rule ID: ENGLISH_WORD_REPEAT_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a word
Suggestion: had
...its independence from the USSR in 1991, had had collapsed industry as well as economy; ...
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Line 2, column 217, Rule ID: AND_ETC[1]
Message: Use simply 'etc.'.
Suggestion: etc.
...rn countries as the USA, Canada, France and etc. have heavily invested in this newly ind...
^^^^^^^^
Line 2, column 962, Rule ID: AND_ETC[1]
Message: Use simply 'etc.'.
Suggestion: etc.
...n 2013, International EXPO 2017 in 2017 and etc., which has contributed to elevate in ma...
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Line 3, column 709, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... technologies to utilize in Kazakhstan. There have been many discoveries in Kaza...
^^^
Line 4, column 229, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... this Central Asian country to prosper.
^^^^^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, however, if, moreover, nevertheless, so, well, for instance, in contrast, as well as, on the other hand

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 6.0 13.1623246493 46% => More to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 0.0 7.85571142285 0% => OK
Conjunction : 7.0 10.4138276553 67% => OK
Relative clauses : 5.0 7.30460921844 68% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 13.0 24.0651302605 54% => OK
Preposition: 53.0 41.998997996 126% => OK
Nominalization: 6.0 8.3376753507 72% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2065.0 1615.20841683 128% => OK
No of words: 337.0 315.596192385 107% => OK
Chars per words: 6.12759643917 5.12529762239 120% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.28457229495 4.20363070211 102% => OK
Word Length SD: 3.55202743769 2.80592935109 127% => OK
Unique words: 203.0 176.041082164 115% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.60237388724 0.561755894193 107% => OK
syllable_count: 636.3 506.74238477 126% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.9 1.60771543086 118% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 2.0 5.43587174349 37% => OK
Article: 2.0 2.52805611222 79% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 2.10420841683 48% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 0.809619238477 0% => OK
Preposition: 5.0 4.76152304609 105% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 13.0 16.0721442886 81% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 25.0 20.2975951904 123% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 71.1868114905 49.4020404114 144% => OK
Chars per sentence: 158.846153846 106.682146367 149% => OK
Words per sentence: 25.9230769231 20.7667163134 125% => OK
Discourse Markers: 8.30769230769 7.06120827912 118% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.38176352705 91% => OK
Language errors: 5.0 5.01903807615 100% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 6.0 8.67935871743 69% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 1.0 3.9879759519 25% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 6.0 3.4128256513 176% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.113957364788 0.244688304435 47% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0491747984488 0.084324248473 58% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0533557291881 0.0667982634062 80% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.09271147481 0.151304729494 61% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0621595589899 0.056905535591 109% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 20.4 13.0946893788 156% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 20.72 50.2224549098 41% => Flesch_reading_ease is low.
smog_index: 13.0 7.44779559118 175% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 16.6 11.3001002004 147% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 18.57 12.4159519038 150% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 10.83 8.58950901804 126% => OK
difficult_words: 127.0 78.4519038076 162% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 12.5 9.78957915832 128% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.0 10.1190380762 119% => OK
text_standard: 13.0 10.7795591182 121% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Rates: 89.8876404494 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 8.0 Out of 9
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.