Many people say that we now live in ‘consumer societies’ where money and possessions are given too much importance. Others believe that consumer culture has played a vital role in improving our lives. Discuss both views and give your opinion

Essay topics:

Many people say that we now live in ‘consumer societies’ where money and possessions are given too much importance. Others believe that consumer culture has played a vital role in improving our lives. Discuss both views and give your opinion

The assertion that consumerism plays a vital role for our improvement seems to me constitute a fundamental confusion/misunderstanding about this issue. Whether to agree or not is a thought- provoking question. Personally. I, like many others, tend to totally agree with the viewpoint that consumerism plays a vital role for our improvement.

The opponents of the argument clearly put the point forward that it tends to be resource hungry and puts more and more pressure on it. This might be true to some extent. However, I think that consumerism helps job sector by creating new jobs. To emphasise this view let us consider a situation, when people want to consume a product frequently, the manufacturers ensure this by employing more when people employees.
People who believe that consumerism is not important usually mention that this train creates is that not only destroys our environment, but also has bad effects on our heath. This also may be true. But I think it improves the quality of citizen’s life and reduces the poverty of the society.

Apart from the above-mentioned reasons, the opponents of the viewpoint may also claim that money is not the only factor of happiness and paying attention to gain money only may lead to serious consequences. This also seems true with an one eyed view. But I think consumerism helps and encourages creativity in business. Because the employee will do their best to be creative to earn more and more money.

In conclusion, let me recapitulate the main points of my argument. I think consumerism plays a vital role for our improvement because of new jobs, quality of citizen's life and creativity in business. Although obviously not every single issue related to this argument has been discussed.

Votes
Average: 6.1 (1 vote)

Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 6, column 234, Rule ID: EN_A_VS_AN
Message: Use 'a' instead of 'an' if the following word doesn't start with a vowel sound, e.g. 'a sentence', 'a university'
Suggestion: a
...consequences. This also seems true with an one eyed view. But I think consumerism ...
^^
Line 8, column 201, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “Although” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...tizens life and creativity in business. Although obviously not every single issue relate...
^^^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, however, if, may, so, apart from, i think, in conclusion

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 9.0 13.1623246493 68% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 5.0 7.85571142285 64% => OK
Conjunction : 11.0 10.4138276553 106% => OK
Relative clauses : 11.0 7.30460921844 151% => OK
Pronoun: 33.0 24.0651302605 137% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 33.0 41.998997996 79% => OK
Nominalization: 12.0 8.3376753507 144% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1470.0 1615.20841683 91% => OK
No of words: 289.0 315.596192385 92% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.08650519031 5.12529762239 99% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.12310562562 4.20363070211 98% => OK
Word Length SD: 3.13953543545 2.80592935109 112% => OK
Unique words: 158.0 176.041082164 90% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.546712802768 0.561755894193 97% => OK
syllable_count: 453.6 506.74238477 90% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.60771543086 100% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 5.0 5.43587174349 92% => OK
Article: 4.0 2.52805611222 158% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 2.10420841683 143% => OK
Conjunction: 3.0 0.809619238477 371% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 4.0 4.76152304609 84% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 17.0 16.0721442886 106% => OK
Sentence length: 17.0 20.2975951904 84% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 52.0050569806 49.4020404114 105% => OK
Chars per sentence: 86.4705882353 106.682146367 81% => OK
Words per sentence: 17.0 20.7667163134 82% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.94117647059 7.06120827912 56% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.38176352705 114% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 5.01903807615 40% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 12.0 8.67935871743 138% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 3.9879759519 125% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 0.0 3.4128256513 0% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.140939291363 0.244688304435 58% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0409024291679 0.084324248473 49% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0471533110217 0.0667982634062 71% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.081288272736 0.151304729494 54% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0329584839478 0.056905535591 58% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.0 13.0946893788 84% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 54.22 50.2224549098 108% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.44779559118 118% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.9 11.3001002004 88% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.95 12.4159519038 96% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.19 8.58950901804 95% => OK
difficult_words: 68.0 78.4519038076 87% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 7.0 9.78957915832 72% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.8 10.1190380762 87% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 10.7795591182 83% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Rates: 61.797752809 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 5.5 Out of 9
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.