One of the consequences of improved medical care is that people are living longer and life expectancy is increasing. Do you think the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?

Essay topics:

One of the consequences of improved medical care is that people are living longer and life expectancy is increasing. Do you think the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?

Thanks to advancements in health care, people now live longer than was experienced five decades ago, and many wonder if the positives overshadow the negatives. In my opinion, the merits outweigh the drawbacks in the long run. While our societies suffered from overpopulation during the early days that these improvements in health care technology was introduced, our leaders gradually turned this into an increase in revenue for the government.

The first setback that my country witnessed as a result of the rise in life expectancy was overpopulation. We had more people alive than the resources can cater for. As a result, people fought for virtually everything. Housing was not enough for every one and the roads were always congested because, we had more people using it at a time than it can accommodate. There was also a huge rise in unemployment. The industries were not prepared for the surge in man hours. Loss time injuries and sicknesses to employees were drastically reduced. Employers sought to maximize their revenues and the only way to do this was to stick to their forecast of man hours ab initio. This resulted in the laying off of some staff and in turn, contributed to the growing rate of unemployment. These effects however, didn't live for long.

Our government helped the companies to expand their production capabilities which immediately resulted in the employment of more people and increase in revenue for the government. With extra cash, our nation expanded its infrastructures to accommodate the growing population. Also, people had more money to pay for goods and services, leading to everyone being financially independent.

In addition, those who couldn't take paid jobs took to agriculture. Majority embarked on commercial farming and their was food for all. The country produced enough, that it had so much farm products to export. It was a win-win situation for all.

In conclusion, the advantages of living longer far more overshadows its disadvantages. What societies must learn is to turn the seemingly negative effects of overpopulation to positive ones. This can be achieved by expanding the industries to employ more hands as well as extending the reach of their local products to foreign countries.

Votes
Average: 8.4 (1 vote)

Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 106, Rule ID: MANY_NN[1]
Message: Possible agreement error. The noun wonder seems to be countable; consider using: 'many wonders'.
Suggestion: many wonders
...n was experienced five decades ago, and many wonder if the positives overshadow the negativ...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 802, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: didn't
...of unemployment. These effects however, didnt live for long. Our government helped...
^^^^^
Line 7, column 24, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: couldn't
... independent. In addition, those who couldnt take paid jobs took to agriculture. Maj...
^^^^^^^

Discourse Markers used:
['also', 'but', 'first', 'however', 'if', 'so', 'well', 'while', 'as to', 'in addition', 'in conclusion', 'as a result', 'as well as', 'in my opinion']

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance in Part of Speech:
Nouns: 0.255 0.247107183377 103% => OK
Verbs: 0.17 0.155533422707 109% => OK
Adjectives: 0.055 0.0946595960268 58% => OK
Adverbs: 0.0625 0.0501214627716 125% => OK
Pronouns: 0.0475 0.0437548338989 109% => OK
Prepositions: 0.125 0.122226691241 102% => OK
Participles: 0.04 0.0403226058552 99% => OK
Conjunctions: 2.9940480842 2.80594681477 107% => OK
Infinitives: 0.0425 0.0326793684256 130% => OK
Particles: 0.0 0.00163938923432 0% => OK
Determiners: 0.105 0.0861772015684 122% => OK
Modal_auxiliary: 0.01 0.021408717616 47% => OK
WH_determiners: 0.0075 0.011925033212 63% => OK

Vocabulary words and sentences:
No of characters: 2247.0 1933.35771543 116% => OK
No of words: 363.0 316.048096192 115% => OK
Chars per words: 6.19008264463 6.12580529183 101% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.3649236973 4.20517956788 104% => OK
words length more than 5 chars: 0.358126721763 0.374742101984 96% => OK
words length more than 6 chars: 0.283746556474 0.28420135186 100% => OK
words length more than 7 chars: 0.225895316804 0.203846283523 111% => OK
words length more than 8 chars: 0.157024793388 0.137316102897 114% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.9940480842 2.80594681477 107% => OK
Unique words: 216.0 176.037074148 123% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.595041322314 0.56093040696 106% => OK
Word variations: 69.8337944584 60.7387585426 115% => OK
How many sentences: 23.0 16.0891783567 143% => OK
Sentence length: 15.7826086957 20.7743622355 76% => OK
Sentence length SD: 46.5353088702 49.517814964 94% => OK
Chars per sentence: 97.6956521739 127.492653851 77% => OK
Words per sentence: 15.7826086957 20.7743622355 76% => OK
Discourse Markers: 0.608695652174 0.814263465372 75% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.38877755511 114% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 3.99599198397 75% => OK
Readability: 44.157264343 49.1944974215 90% => OK
Elegance: 1.5 1.69124875643 89% => OK

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.342178713106 0.332605444948 103% => OK
Sentence sentence coherence: 0.0680445467249 0.102741220458 66% => OK
Sentence sentence coherence SD: 0.0504521756722 0.0668466124924 75% => OK
Sentence paragraph coherence: 0.469694947273 0.534860350844 88% => OK
Sentence paragraph coherence SD: 0.153560932244 0.148594505496 103% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.115197329229 0.134430193775 86% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0923162594642 0.0742795772207 124% => OK
Paragraph paragraph coherence: 0.290967189317 0.324371583561 90% => OK
Paragraph paragraph coherence SD: 0.133352786134 0.0638462369009 209% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.210616398627 0.228012699653 92% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0874705176492 0.058150111329 150% => OK

Task Achievement:
Sentences with positive sentiment : 7.0 8.68436873747 81% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 8.0 3.9879759519 201% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 8.0 3.41683366733 234% => Less neutral sentences wanted.
Positive topic words: 5.0 5.90881763527 85% => OK
Negative topic words: 6.0 2.5751503006 233% => OK
Neutral topic words: 6.0 1.9629258517 306% => OK
Total topic words: 17.0 10.4468937876 163% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

---------------------
Rates: 84.2696629213 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 7.5 Out of 9
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.