Some people believe the purpose of education should be helping the individual to become useful for society, while others believe it should help individuals to achieve their ambitions. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.
Opinions are divided on whether the objective of education should be to support individuals to give back to the community or to achieve their career goals. I believe that both should be taught, and neither should be focused at the expense of the other.
It is true that people should be educated to become responsible citizens and benevolent contributors. With regard to the former, a sense of responsibility is developed from education with which one can easily differentiate between right and wrong, thus education helps in reducing the crime rate in society, and builds it a better place for all of us to live in as well as for our counterparts in the future. As for willingness to give and share, children should be taught from the beginning in their primary classes to help less fortunate ones and be kind to others. Encouraging school children to take part in volunteering activities would be a good example of teaching this.
However, giving back to society is just one aim of academic training, the other important one is to enable individuals to accomplish their mission. As far as career goals are concerned, one with the right qualifications and educational background creates more employment opportunities for oneself. In fact, candidates who are well-versed are the ones employers would prefer to hire. Another way individuals are benefitted from education to fulfill their career aspirations is that some of them choose to become scientists and take part in scientific research to solve global problems such as global warming. This, help society and reach their goals.
In conclusion, I believe that the school curriculum should be focused on both enabling individuals to benefit society and achieving their ambitions. Young people should be trained in order to become responsible individuals, to find jobs for themselves, and at the same time to continue the progress of mankind.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 5, column 319, Rule ID: WHO_NOUN[1]
Message: A noun should not follow "who". Try changing to a verb or maybe to 'who is a are'.
Suggestion: who is a are
...nities for oneself. In fact, candidates who are well-versed are the ones employers woul...
^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, however, if, so, thus, well, as for, in conclusion, in fact, such as, as well as, it is true, with regard to
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 19.0 13.1623246493 144% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 10.0 7.85571142285 127% => OK
Conjunction : 12.0 10.4138276553 115% => OK
Relative clauses : 6.0 7.30460921844 82% => OK
Pronoun: 20.0 24.0651302605 83% => OK
Preposition: 51.0 41.998997996 121% => OK
Nominalization: 5.0 8.3376753507 60% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1597.0 1615.20841683 99% => OK
No of words: 309.0 315.596192385 98% => OK
Chars per words: 5.16828478964 5.12529762239 101% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.1926597562 4.20363070211 100% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.95452418198 2.80592935109 105% => OK
Unique words: 168.0 176.041082164 95% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.543689320388 0.561755894193 97% => OK
syllable_count: 499.5 506.74238477 99% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.60771543086 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 3.0 5.43587174349 55% => OK
Article: 2.0 2.52805611222 79% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 2.10420841683 95% => OK
Conjunction: 3.0 0.809619238477 371% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 4.0 4.76152304609 84% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 13.0 16.0721442886 81% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 23.0 20.2975951904 113% => OK
Sentence length SD: 63.7804110084 49.4020404114 129% => OK
Chars per sentence: 122.846153846 106.682146367 115% => OK
Words per sentence: 23.7692307692 20.7667163134 114% => OK
Discourse Markers: 8.69230769231 7.06120827912 123% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.38176352705 91% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 5.01903807615 20% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 11.0 8.67935871743 127% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 1.0 3.9879759519 25% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 3.4128256513 29% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.421553841301 0.244688304435 172% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.150544902535 0.084324248473 179% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0964790512257 0.0667982634062 144% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.272016003668 0.151304729494 180% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0798860603238 0.056905535591 140% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.8 13.0946893788 113% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 48.13 50.2224549098 96% => OK
smog_index: 11.2 7.44779559118 150% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.3 11.3001002004 109% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.0 12.4159519038 105% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.81 8.58950901804 103% => OK
difficult_words: 79.0 78.4519038076 101% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 15.5 9.78957915832 158% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.2 10.1190380762 111% => OK
text_standard: 13.0 10.7795591182 121% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 73.0337078652 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 6.5 Out of 9
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.