Agree/Disagree
Celebrities of famous people (Athletes and ...) are more important for young-people rather than old-people
Without any doubt renoun people have a lasting effect on young people compare to olders. In this regret I have to admit that I completely agree with this stetment. There are two points in support of my idea. Firstly, a vast number of young people are emotionly related to famous people. Secondly, they always follow well-known actors and athletes and pick them as idols. In this essay I will elaborate my reasons and try to shed some light on my perspective through ample examples.
The first exquisit point to be mentioned is that young people espesially teenagers have emotionally related to renoun people. My personal anecdote will well demonstrate this point of view. My sister loves Miley Cyrus, an american actoress, my sister always followes Cyrus celebrities because she wants become an actoress such as her idol. Consequntly, my sister emotionally follow her idol life style. Beside that, teenagers are emotionally tangible and they could not control their loves.
From another aspect younger persons need an hero for their life and many of teenagers pick athletes as their idol. In this way younger people tend to follow their celebrities in order to prey his/her activities. The experince of my friend could justify my reason. He loves an football player and follow his activities every where and knowned him as an national hero due to the fact that the soccer player has a number of national goals. To make a long story short, he follow all the player celebrities in order to pave the path for thanks his goals.
Taken all aspect mentioned above into considaration, I pretty agree with the statment that celebrities are more important for young people rather than old persons. the young people's emotions and giving famous people as an idol for them are reasons behind my choice, meanwhile, there are some contrary idea that believe celebrities could important for older people.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 302, Rule ID: NEEDS_FIXED[1]
Message: "wants become" is only accepted in certain dialects. For something more widely acceptable, try 'become' or 'to be become'.
Suggestion: become; to be become
...wes Cyrus celebrities because she wants become an actoress such as her idol. Consequnt...
^^^^^^
Line 3, column 42, Rule ID: EN_A_VS_AN
Message: Use 'a' instead of 'an' if the following word doesn't start with a vowel sound, e.g. 'a sentence', 'a university'
Suggestion: a
...rom another aspect younger persons need an hero for their life and many of teenage...
^^
Line 3, column 273, Rule ID: EN_A_VS_AN
Message: Use 'a' instead of 'an' if the following word doesn't start with a vowel sound, e.g. 'a sentence', 'a university'
Suggestion: a
...riend could justify my reason. He loves an football player and follow his activiti...
^^
Line 3, column 318, Rule ID: EVERY_WHERE[1]
Message: Did you mean 'everywhere'?
Suggestion: everywhere
...otball player and follow his activities every where and knowned him as an national hero due...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 349, Rule ID: EN_A_VS_AN
Message: Use 'a' instead of 'an' if the following word doesn't start with a vowel sound, e.g. 'a sentence', 'a university'
Suggestion: a
...tivities every where and knowned him as an national hero due to the fact that the ...
^^
Line 3, column 468, Rule ID: HE_VERB_AGR[1]
Message: The pronoun 'he' must be used with a third-person verb: 'follows'.
Suggestion: follows
...l goals. To make a long story short, he follow all the player celebrities in order to ...
^^^^^^
Line 4, column 164, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: The
...r young people rather than old persons. the young peoples emotions and giving famou...
^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
first, firstly, if, second, secondly, so, well, while, such as
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 8.0 15.1003584229 53% => More to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 6.0 9.8082437276 61% => OK
Conjunction : 8.0 13.8261648746 58% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 7.0 11.0286738351 63% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 43.0 43.0788530466 100% => OK
Preposition: 34.0 52.1666666667 65% => OK
Nominalization: 3.0 8.0752688172 37% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1578.0 1977.66487455 80% => OK
No of words: 315.0 407.700716846 77% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.00952380952 4.8611393121 103% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.21286593061 4.48103885553 94% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.50648139422 2.67179642975 94% => OK
Unique words: 172.0 212.727598566 81% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.546031746032 0.524837075471 104% => OK
syllable_count: 498.6 618.680645161 81% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.51630824373 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 8.0 9.59856630824 83% => OK
Article: 5.0 3.08781362007 162% => OK
Subordination: 0.0 3.51792114695 0% => More adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 0.0 1.86738351254 0% => OK
Preposition: 7.0 4.94265232975 142% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 18.0 20.6003584229 87% => OK
Sentence length: 17.0 20.1344086022 84% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 42.6031428157 48.9658058833 87% => OK
Chars per sentence: 87.6666666667 100.406767564 87% => OK
Words per sentence: 17.5 20.6045352989 85% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.44444444444 5.45110844103 63% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 7.0 5.5376344086 126% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 11.0 11.8709677419 93% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 2.0 3.85842293907 52% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 5.0 4.88709677419 102% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.284077942564 0.236089414692 120% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0906550647713 0.076458572812 119% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.12477616914 0.0737576698707 169% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.206737429897 0.150856017488 137% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.171585845802 0.0645574589148 266% => More connections among paragraphs wanted.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 10.9 11.7677419355 93% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 54.22 58.1214874552 93% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.9 10.1575268817 97% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.48 10.9000537634 105% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.14 8.01818996416 102% => OK
difficult_words: 73.0 86.8835125448 84% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 7.0 10.002688172 70% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.8 10.0537634409 88% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 10.247311828 107% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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We are expecting: No. of Words: 350 while No. of Different Words: 200
Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 70.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 21.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.