Because of technological advances, televisions are widespread for most families. Since children spend more time watching TV than the older generations could not have afforded to have TVs in their homes during their childhoods, televisions have become more influential in children’s life. Considering the harmful impacts of television advertisements on children, I agree with the statement that television advertising directed toward young children (aged two to five) should not be allowed.
First, young children are more vulnerable to the images shown in TVs because they cannot distinguish what’s real or not. The advertisements often exarate the positive sides of products by concealing the side effects. For example, fast foods were advertised to be appealing to young children while they can harm their healthy eating habits. Because young children do not have enough knowledge and experience to evaluate the quality of products, they tend to trust the advertisements without considering the negative aspects of the products.
Second, the advertisements could create tension in families and friends. For instance, influenced by the advertisements of toys, young children will ask parents for buying the products. If the adults don’t let them have the toys, the children would have a repulsive feeling toward the adults. The children might even be excluded by their friends who play with the toys. However, in case the adults give everything that children find appealing in television advertisements, the children will become indulged, which develops peevish personalities that would hardly be fixed.
Despite those drawbacks, young children can benefit from TV advertisements that do not directly target the children. TV commercials include creative descriptions of products that trigger their curiosities. For example, by watching the commercials of travel companies, children can gain ideas about different places and cultures in the world. Some advertisements involve rhythmical dances and catchy music, which inspire children to imitate the choreographies and to sing after the songs. Likewise, advertisements can be more enjoyable for young children as long as the advertisements are not designed to target the vulnerable age group.
In conclusion, I agree that television advertisements should not focus on young children because of the harmful impacts on their healthy development and relationship with others.
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 489, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...aged two to five should not be allowed. First, young children are more vulnerabl...
^^^^
Line 5, column 179, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...velopment and relationship with others.
^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
first, however, if, likewise, second, so, while, for example, for instance, in conclusion
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 9.0 15.1003584229 60% => More to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 14.0 9.8082437276 143% => OK
Conjunction : 7.0 13.8261648746 51% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 9.0 11.0286738351 82% => OK
Pronoun: 19.0 43.0788530466 44% => OK
Preposition: 48.0 52.1666666667 92% => OK
Nominalization: 4.0 8.0752688172 50% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2071.0 1977.66487455 105% => OK
No of words: 362.0 407.700716846 89% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.72099447514 4.8611393121 118% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.36191444098 4.48103885553 97% => OK
Word Length SD: 3.12049192555 2.67179642975 117% => OK
Unique words: 193.0 212.727598566 91% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.533149171271 0.524837075471 102% => OK
syllable_count: 612.9 618.680645161 99% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.51630824373 112% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 3.0 9.59856630824 31% => OK
Article: 5.0 3.08781362007 162% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 3.51792114695 114% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.86738351254 0% => OK
Preposition: 7.0 4.94265232975 142% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 18.0 20.6003584229 87% => OK
Sentence length: 20.0 20.1344086022 99% => OK
Sentence length SD: 44.9285097422 48.9658058833 92% => OK
Chars per sentence: 115.055555556 100.406767564 115% => OK
Words per sentence: 20.1111111111 20.6045352989 98% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.94444444444 5.45110844103 91% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.53405017921 110% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 5.5376344086 36% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 13.0 11.8709677419 110% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 2.0 3.85842293907 52% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.88709677419 61% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.287965751884 0.236089414692 122% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.101769807649 0.076458572812 133% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0926018538228 0.0737576698707 126% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.187888878757 0.150856017488 125% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0441822945074 0.0645574589148 68% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 15.6 11.7677419355 133% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 42.72 58.1214874552 74% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.3 10.1575268817 121% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 15.9 10.9000537634 146% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.9 8.01818996416 111% => OK
difficult_words: 98.0 86.8835125448 113% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 12.0 10.002688172 120% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.0 10.0537634409 99% => OK
text_standard: 16.0 10.247311828 156% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 81.6666666667 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 24.5 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.