I lived in a small town when I was young. Last year, I moved to Beijing, the capital of China, which is one of the biggest cities in the world. Undoubtedly, Beijing city's fundamental facilities are better than any others, so many people reckon Beijing as their dream city. However, I prefer to go back to my hometown, because I insist that city's development has negative effects on the development of society.
First of all, the main symbol of the development of a city is that many people move there. There is always a crowd near the citizen. Therefore, people have a complex relationship net, which needs them to spend a lot of energy handling. Also, they have too many colleagues and neighbors to spend time with them, which makes citizens just like an atom in society. People can't build a deep relationship in this complex net, and they are less likely to have close friends. If we don't have close friends, we can't seek help when we are down, nor share our happiness when we are delighted. So we feel so alone, this aloneness let us down. What drives us to escape from the big city is more relationships and more shallow friendships we have.
Secondly, the development of cities is likely to lead to a series of health problems in citizens. The rapid growth of the city border is a trigger of construction and industrialization, which is a reason for pollution. Pollution endangers people's life by acid rain, haze, and so on. Besides, industrialization means efficiency, that is a worker will undertake more tasks and pressure. Take me as an example. I just have to work for six or seven hours in my hometown and go home for relaxation, however, I must double my work time to finish my task. Pollution and pressure persuade me in leaving the big city, with a variety of sicknesses, such as heart issues, obesity, etc. Although medical treatment is updated through the development of cities, we are more easily to catch an illness than before, which is not considered to the development of society.
To conclude, I disagree that the development of cities pushes society's development.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 370, Rule ID: CANT[1]
Message: Did you mean 'can't' or 'cannot'?
Suggestion: can't; cannot
...ns just like an atom in society. People cant build a deep relationship in this compl...
^^^^
Line 3, column 476, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: don't
...ess likely to have close friends. If we dont have close friends, we cant seek help w...
^^^^
Line 3, column 504, Rule ID: CANT[1]
Message: Did you mean 'can't' or 'cannot'?
Suggestion: can't; cannot
...ends. If we dont have close friends, we cant seek help when we are down, nor share o...
^^^^
Line 3, column 736, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: That's
...s and more shallow friendships we have. Thats not strange that increasing people suff...
^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, besides, first, however, if, second, secondly, so, therefore, such as, first of all
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 16.0 15.1003584229 106% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 2.0 9.8082437276 20% => OK
Conjunction : 11.0 13.8261648746 80% => OK
Relative clauses : 13.0 11.0286738351 118% => OK
Pronoun: 36.0 43.0788530466 84% => OK
Preposition: 49.0 52.1666666667 94% => OK
Nominalization: 16.0 8.0752688172 198% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1793.0 1977.66487455 91% => OK
No of words: 374.0 407.700716846 92% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.79411764706 4.8611393121 99% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.3976220399 4.48103885553 98% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.84812578191 2.67179642975 107% => OK
Unique words: 212.0 212.727598566 100% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.566844919786 0.524837075471 108% => OK
syllable_count: 564.3 618.680645161 91% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 11.0 9.59856630824 115% => OK
Article: 4.0 3.08781362007 130% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 3.51792114695 85% => OK
Conjunction: 4.0 1.86738351254 214% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 2.0 4.94265232975 40% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 22.0 20.6003584229 107% => OK
Sentence length: 17.0 20.1344086022 84% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 37.3746113056 48.9658058833 76% => OK
Chars per sentence: 81.5 100.406767564 81% => OK
Words per sentence: 17.0 20.6045352989 83% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.04545454545 5.45110844103 74% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 4.0 5.5376344086 72% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 8.0 11.8709677419 67% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 8.0 3.85842293907 207% => Less negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 6.0 4.88709677419 123% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.135178239692 0.236089414692 57% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0435447268838 0.076458572812 57% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0705786707328 0.0737576698707 96% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.130638269424 0.150856017488 87% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0940201951437 0.0645574589148 146% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 9.6 11.7677419355 82% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 62.68 58.1214874552 108% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 8.7 10.1575268817 86% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.21 10.9000537634 94% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.24 8.01818996416 103% => OK
difficult_words: 89.0 86.8835125448 102% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.5 10.002688172 85% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.8 10.0537634409 88% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 10.247311828 88% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 70.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 21.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.