School used to offer three after-class activities:
1. sports
2. art
3. volunteering
This year, school's extra money may only can offer one activity. Which one do you choose and why?
In this sophisticated and progressive world, school is one of the significant periods in any body’s life. In this respect, existing some extra classes besides usual class frameworks are highly important. In my opinion, the Art class is so practical and helpful for the only choice of additional activity. There are a lot of reasons for the choice and I would like to put them in the following way.
To begin with, Art facilitates stress, anxiety, and being tired of strict classes in students. On the other hand, many students struggle with different issues and there is much pressure on them for exams, classes, and their home works. on this issue, art activities will reduce or eliminate the harmful impressions and help them to reach on a balance. As an illustration, when I was a psychologist in elementary school, the students have expressed many negative emotions based on their lessons exclusively mathematics and science. I had put Art class between their classes to use any art instruments and be free for at least one hour of a day. As a result, their teachers have reported to me that they are calmer with a better concentration in classes. This example demonstrates how much art activities are substantial for students.
Moreover, art improves the brain's ability of students and leads them to be more creative. Psychologically speaking, childhood is the most important stage for life because many characteristics and features are built in this period. Improving brain functions due to art is recommended by experts. Art is a connector between right and left brain hemispheres. By using both of these, many different parts of the brain stimulate simultaneously. Hence, this person can think and act differently and ameliorate his or her skills like problem-solving, critical thinking, and be more flexible in stressful daily issues, so if a child starts to use art and improve brain functions, he or she will be a successful person as an adult.
Consequently, based on all the above-mentioned points, I think it is better for this school to select the art class. This election not only helps students to diminish their anxiety and stress which is common for them, but also Arts has many beneficial effects on the brain to work stronger.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 90, Rule ID: ANY_BODY[2]
Message: Did you mean 'anybody'?
Suggestion: anybody
...ol is one of the significant periods in any body’s life. In this respect, existing some ...
^^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 205, Rule ID: ENGLISH_WORD_REPEAT_BEGINNING_RULE
Message: Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Reword the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
... class frameworks are highly important. In my opinion, the Art class is so practic...
^^
Line 2, column 236, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: On
...r exams, classes, and their home works. on this issue, art activities will reduce ...
^^
Line 3, column 28, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'brains'' or 'brain's'?
Suggestion: brains'; brain's
...r students. Moreover, art improves the brains ability of students and leads them to b...
^^^^^^
Line 3, column 380, Rule ID: NUMEROUS_DIFFERENT[1]
Message: Use simply 'many'.
Suggestion: many
...in hemispheres. By using both of these, many different parts of the brain stimulate simultaneo...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, besides, but, consequently, hence, if, moreover, so, at least, i think, as a result, in my opinion, to begin with, on the other hand
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 19.0 15.1003584229 126% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 4.0 9.8082437276 41% => OK
Conjunction : 21.0 13.8261648746 152% => OK
Relative clauses : 3.0 11.0286738351 27% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 32.0 43.0788530466 74% => OK
Preposition: 48.0 52.1666666667 92% => OK
Nominalization: 5.0 8.0752688172 62% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1882.0 1977.66487455 95% => OK
No of words: 375.0 407.700716846 92% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.01866666667 4.8611393121 103% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.40055868397 4.48103885553 98% => OK
Word Length SD: 3.00265482532 2.67179642975 112% => OK
Unique words: 214.0 212.727598566 101% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.570666666667 0.524837075471 109% => OK
syllable_count: 575.1 618.680645161 93% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 7.0 9.59856630824 73% => OK
Article: 2.0 3.08781362007 65% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 3.51792114695 85% => OK
Conjunction: 4.0 1.86738351254 214% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 7.0 4.94265232975 142% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 19.0 20.6003584229 92% => OK
Sentence length: 19.0 20.1344086022 94% => OK
Sentence length SD: 49.5992806668 48.9658058833 101% => OK
Chars per sentence: 99.0526315789 100.406767564 99% => OK
Words per sentence: 19.7368421053 20.6045352989 96% => OK
Discourse Markers: 7.26315789474 5.45110844103 133% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 5.0 5.5376344086 90% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 15.0 11.8709677419 126% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 3.85842293907 78% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 4.88709677419 20% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.198941333707 0.236089414692 84% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0641914563324 0.076458572812 84% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0487330660973 0.0737576698707 66% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.130959074148 0.150856017488 87% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0366158035586 0.0645574589148 57% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.1 11.7677419355 103% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 60.65 58.1214874552 104% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.5 10.1575268817 94% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.84 10.9000537634 109% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.37 8.01818996416 104% => OK
difficult_words: 90.0 86.8835125448 104% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.0 10.002688172 80% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.6 10.0537634409 95% => OK
text_standard: 10.0 10.247311828 98% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 80.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 24.0 Out of 30
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.