Some parents offer their school-age children money for each high grade (mark) they get in school. Do you think this is a good idea?

Essay topics:

Some parents offer their school-age children money for each high grade (mark) they get in school. Do you think this is a good idea?

Children should have impetus to improve their educational status. According to different social classes, parents consider different prizes for their children to encourage them to make headway in their learning such as giving them money, admire them orally, and buying books, to name but a handful. In this regard, there is a long-standing discussion among psychologists about the best gift parents could offer their offspring for each high grade they get in school. Some psychologists believe that parents should not pay children money for their good mark and other prizes are much better than money. Others, however, advocate the idea that giving children money thanks to their great performance in school could be tremendously instructive. I personally, concur with the latter. In the following paragraphs, I will delve into the most important reasons.

First of all, children should learn to manage their expenses in the near future. If parents offer their children money for high grade they obtain in exams, they become aware of the value of money. In other words, they understand that without effort they cannot achieve anything, as oppose to a situation, when parents provide lots of money for their children whenever they want and need as allowance. For example, in my childhood, my father promised to give me enough money that sufficed to purchase a bicycle, if I obtained a specific score or higher in my final exams. I strove to achieve this goal, so I became the first-ranked student. By doing so, I understood that for achieving everything in life, individuals should attempt continually. Had my father gave me pocket money without any request, I would have not become prosperous in the sphere of science and education now.

Secondly, by paying children money for their great performance in school, they have some independence to spend their money to whatever they want. One of the most important qualities an individual must have is being independent. Parents should not decide for children all the time. If parent offer their children money for their high scores, they allow them to be independent and do not rely too much to their parents for their decisions. In addition, they can enjoy spending money in the way that is desirable for them such as going to recreation centers, zoo, park to name but a few with their friend.

All in all, I really believe that parents should not give their children money without any convention and expectation. It makes children dependent and aimless. Hence, should parent offer their children money for their high marks, they pave the way for their future success from many aspects.

Votes
Average: 7.6 (1 vote)
Essay Categories

Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 280, Rule ID: AS_OPPOSE_TO_AS_OPPOSED_TO[1]
Message: Did you mean 'as opposed to'?
Suggestion: as opposed to
...ut effort they cannot achieve anything, as oppose to a situation, when parents provide lots ...
^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 566, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...s going to recreation centers, zoo, park to name but a few with their friend. A...
^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, first, hence, however, if, really, second, secondly, so, for example, in addition, such as, first of all, in other words

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 7.0 15.1003584229 46% => More to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 15.0 9.8082437276 153% => OK
Conjunction : 10.0 13.8261648746 72% => OK
Relative clauses : 8.0 11.0286738351 73% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 60.0 43.0788530466 139% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 51.0 52.1666666667 98% => OK
Nominalization: 11.0 8.0752688172 136% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2208.0 1977.66487455 112% => OK
No of words: 434.0 407.700716846 106% => OK
Chars per words: 5.08755760369 4.8611393121 105% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.56428161445 4.48103885553 102% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.60203854695 2.67179642975 97% => OK
Unique words: 223.0 212.727598566 105% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.513824884793 0.524837075471 98% => OK
syllable_count: 656.1 618.680645161 106% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 14.0 9.59856630824 146% => OK
Article: 0.0 3.08781362007 0% => OK
Subordination: 5.0 3.51792114695 142% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.86738351254 54% => OK
Preposition: 9.0 4.94265232975 182% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 22.0 20.6003584229 107% => OK
Sentence length: 19.0 20.1344086022 94% => OK
Sentence length SD: 51.2566262598 48.9658058833 105% => OK
Chars per sentence: 100.363636364 100.406767564 100% => OK
Words per sentence: 19.7272727273 20.6045352989 96% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.68181818182 5.45110844103 104% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 5.5376344086 36% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 14.0 11.8709677419 118% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 1.0 3.85842293907 26% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 7.0 4.88709677419 143% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.463171595584 0.236089414692 196% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.140865816192 0.076458572812 184% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.1194680364 0.0737576698707 162% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.314765065864 0.150856017488 209% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0626382892755 0.0645574589148 97% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.4 11.7677419355 105% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 60.65 58.1214874552 104% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.5 10.1575268817 94% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.24 10.9000537634 112% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.89 8.01818996416 98% => OK
difficult_words: 91.0 86.8835125448 105% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 10.5 10.002688172 105% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.6 10.0537634409 95% => OK
text_standard: 10.0 10.247311828 98% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:

para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.

So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:

reasons == advantages or

reasons == disadvantages

for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.

or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.


Rates: 76.6666666667 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 23.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.