TPO-01 - Independent Writing Task Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?At universities and colleges, sports and social activities are just as important as classes and libraries and should receive equal financial support.Use specific reaso

In our 21st century, it is essential for human beings to be healthy and sociable with other people. I agree with the statement that says sports and social activities are as important as classes and libraries and should receive equal financial support. The reason why i feel this way will be deliberated in the following essay.

Many people believe that classes and libraries are the most important thing to do at universities and colleges. People who feel this way think that students should have done social activities and sports in their high-school and they suppose students only have to educate themselves at universities and colleges. Because of this thought, classes and libraries believed to be more estimated than social activities and sports. However, this thought is considered to be false due to that socialism is as important as classes and sports are vital as education.

It is evident that socialism is regarded equally essential as classes and libraries, and there are several examples to support it. From the people i know, many people have taken financial support just because of their activities in sports and society. For instance, there was my friend named Emi and she had volunteered in many organizations such as Mongolian Red Cross and United Nations Student advisory panel for several years. In the result of her social activities and kindness for others, she took financial support and continued taking it until she graduated due to her activities out of classes. Moreover, universities and colleges require students to do volunteering job for several hours at least. Which, I believe, is the proof that kindness for others, social activities, and sports activities are as important as classes and libraries, and they receive equal financial support from universities and colleges.

In conclusion, i believe that not only classes but every kind of skills are becoming important in nowadays. More specifically, social activities and sports are as vital as education and should receive equal financial support because in the world and century we live, people who are only good at their job isn’t considered skillful anymore.

Votes
Average: 8.7 (3 votes)
Essay Categories

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 268, Rule ID: I_LOWERCASE[2]
Message: Did you mean 'I'?
Suggestion: I
...equal financial support. The reason why i feel this way will be deliberated in th...
^
Line 5, column 148, Rule ID: I_LOWERCASE[2]
Message: Did you mean 'I'?
Suggestion: I
...examples to support it. From the people i know, many people have taken financial ...
^
Line 5, column 923, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...support from universities and colleges. In conclusion, i believe that not only c...
^^^^^
Line 7, column 16, Rule ID: I_LOWERCASE[2]
Message: Did you mean 'I'?
Suggestion: I
...ities and colleges. In conclusion, i believe that not only classes but every...
^
Line 7, column 96, Rule ID: IN_NOWADAYS[1]
Message: nowadays is used without 'in'. Use simply: 'nowadays'.
Suggestion: nowadays
...y kind of skills are becoming important in nowadays. More specifically, social activities a...
^^^^^^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, however, if, moreover, so, at least, for instance, i feel, in conclusion, kind of, such as

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 19.0 15.1003584229 126% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 4.0 9.8082437276 41% => OK
Conjunction : 28.0 13.8261648746 203% => Less conjunction wanted
Relative clauses : 9.0 11.0286738351 82% => OK
Pronoun: 34.0 43.0788530466 79% => OK
Preposition: 32.0 52.1666666667 61% => OK
Nominalization: 4.0 8.0752688172 50% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1818.0 1977.66487455 92% => OK
No of words: 346.0 407.700716846 85% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.25433526012 4.8611393121 108% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.31289638616 4.48103885553 96% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.77487353792 2.67179642975 104% => OK
Unique words: 157.0 212.727598566 74% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.453757225434 0.524837075471 86% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 567.9 618.680645161 92% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.51630824373 106% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 7.0 9.59856630824 73% => OK
Article: 1.0 3.08781362007 32% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 3.51792114695 28% => OK
Conjunction: 3.0 1.86738351254 161% => OK
Preposition: 5.0 4.94265232975 101% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 15.0 20.6003584229 73% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 23.0 20.1344086022 114% => OK
Sentence length SD: 45.6737220827 48.9658058833 93% => OK
Chars per sentence: 121.2 100.406767564 121% => OK
Words per sentence: 23.0666666667 20.6045352989 112% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.33333333333 5.45110844103 116% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 5.0 5.5376344086 90% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 11.0 11.8709677419 93% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 0.0 3.85842293907 0% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 4.88709677419 82% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.36951713859 0.236089414692 157% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.142535556389 0.076458572812 186% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.124515554267 0.0737576698707 169% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.234622447496 0.150856017488 156% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.034589246292 0.0645574589148 54% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.8 11.7677419355 126% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 48.13 58.1214874552 83% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.3 10.1575268817 121% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.47 10.9000537634 124% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.79 8.01818996416 97% => OK
difficult_words: 66.0 86.8835125448 76% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 10.002688172 110% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.2 10.0537634409 111% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 10.247311828 107% => OK
What are above readability scores?

---------------------
We are expecting: No. of Words: 350 while No. of Different Words: 200
Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:

para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.

So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:

reasons == advantages or

reasons == disadvantages

for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.

or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.


Rates: 60.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 18.0 Out of 30
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.