Altruism is a type of behavior in which an animal sacrifices its own interest for that of another animal or group of animals. Altruism is the opposite of selfishness; individuals performing altruistic acts gain nothing for themselves. Examples of altruism abound, both among humans and among other mammals. Unselfish acts among humans range from the sharing of food with strangers to the donation of body organs to family members, and even to strangers. Such acts are altruistic in that they benefit another, yet provide little reward to the one performing the act. In fact, many species of animals appear willing to sacrifice food, or even their life, to assist other members of their group. The meerkat, which is a mammal that dwells in burrows in grassland areas of Africa, is often cited as an example. In groups of meerkats, an individual acts as a sentinel, standing guard and looking out for predators while the others hunt for food or eat food they have obtained. If the sentinel meerkat sees a predator such as a hawk approaching the group, it gives an alarm cry alerting the other meerkats to run and seek shelter. By standing guard, the sentinel meerkat gains nothing-it goes without food while the others eat, and it places itself in grave danger. After it issues an alarm, it has to flee alone, which might make it more at risk to a predator, since animals in groups are often able to work together to fend off a predator. So the altruistic sentinel behavior helps ensure the survival of other members of the meerkat's group.
The reading talks about Altruism, an act in which an animal would sacrifice its own self-interest in order to benefit another animal or group of animals. The reading states one example of altruism behavior in the form of the meerkat. A mammal who would stand guard and act as a sentinel to look out for predators while its group would hunt or eat food they have obtained, the sentinel meerkat also keep watch without food. The sentinel meerkat would let out an alarm cry if a predator is approaching, which alerts the other meerkats to make an escape. Another example is that humans would donate body organs to family members or even strangers.
The lecturer, however, disagrees with the reading. She states that sentinel meerkats would have eaten first and then stand guard to look out for predators. And that in the event of an approaching predator, the sentinel meerkat is the one who would be able to go under its burrow first. This causes the other group of meerkats to be at greater risk of being hunted by the predator, as it also causes panic among the group.
Another point that the lecturer made is that humans can also be victims of altruism. When a donor donates his organs to another person, the donor receives appreciation and approval from his friends, family members, and society. The donor also gains an increase in his self-worth. This can cause the donor to gain a superiority complex towards everyone.
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, first, however, if, look, so, then, while
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 8.0 10.4613686534 76% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 9.0 5.04856512141 178% => OK
Conjunction : 8.0 7.30242825607 110% => OK
Relative clauses : 10.0 12.0772626932 83% => OK
Pronoun: 16.0 22.412803532 71% => OK
Preposition: 32.0 30.3222958057 106% => OK
Nominalization: 1.0 5.01324503311 20% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1188.0 1373.03311258 87% => OK
No of words: 247.0 270.72406181 91% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.80971659919 5.08290768461 95% => OK
Fourth root words length: 3.96437052324 4.04702891845 98% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.43493238853 2.5805825403 94% => OK
Unique words: 134.0 145.348785872 92% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.542510121457 0.540411800872 100% => OK
syllable_count: 360.9 419.366225166 86% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.55342163355 97% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 3.0 3.25607064018 92% => OK
Article: 10.0 8.23620309051 121% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 1.25165562914 160% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.51434878587 132% => OK
Preposition: 0.0 2.5761589404 0% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 13.0 13.0662251656 99% => OK
Sentence length: 19.0 21.2450331126 89% => OK
Sentence length SD: 39.9502649383 49.2860985944 81% => OK
Chars per sentence: 91.3846153846 110.228320801 83% => OK
Words per sentence: 19.0 21.698381199 88% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.61538461538 7.06452816374 51% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 3.0 4.09492273731 73% => More paragraphs wanted.
Language errors: 0.0 4.19205298013 0% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 4.0 4.33554083885 92% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 4.45695364238 90% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 5.0 4.27373068433 117% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.246072151138 0.272083759551 90% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0884814146966 0.0996497079465 89% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.110140228532 0.0662205650399 166% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.149113687535 0.162205337803 92% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.106211895129 0.0443174109184 240% => More connections among paragraphs wanted.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 10.7 13.3589403974 80% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 60.65 53.8541721854 113% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 5.55761589404 56% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.5 11.0289183223 86% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.62 12.2367328918 87% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.09 8.42419426049 96% => OK
difficult_words: 55.0 63.6247240618 86% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 13.0 10.7273730684 121% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.6 10.498013245 91% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 11.2008830022 98% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Minimum four paragraphs wanted. The correct pattern:
para 1: introduction
para 2: doubt 1
para 3: doubt 2
para 4: doubt 3
Less contents wanted from the reading passages(25%), more content wanted from the lecture (75%).
Don't need a conclusion paragraph.
Read sample essays from ETS:
http://www.testbig.com/users/toeflwritingmaster
Rates: 75.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 22.5 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.