The argument assumes that the citizens of Forsythe have adopted more healthful lifestyles because it indicates that few of the citizens tend to eat sulia and they conform more government nutritional recommendations than before. However, without thinking about some specific evidence about these reasons, the argument is tenuous.
One problem of the argument is the survey showing citizens conform more closesly to government nutritional recommendations thatn before. Without giving some specific evidence about the survey, its credibility is unsubstantiated. We do not know who made the survey and the amount of people included in the survey. The survey may did by workers of the magazine company, whose purpose is exaggerating the truth and absorbing more citizens' attention to get more profits. In this way, the truth may be belied. Moreover, people involved in the survey may not considerable, so it cannot represent most citizens' willings and interests. So the survey is unconvincing. Even if people really obey their government, the reason for citizens' conformation may due to some benefits from the government. The government may supply some awards or bonus to people, if they conform the recommendation. Hence, the survey is tenuous without some specific evidence about the details.
Furthermore, another problem of the argument is the fourfold increase in sales of food products containing kiran. What is the base amount of the sales of food products containing kiran before? We do not know. If the sales is not enormous at the beginning, the number of increment is not significant, which is not convincing to prove people are more healthier. Even though the fourfold increment certainly represent a gigantic number, people purchase food products containing kiran may due to other reasons. The price of these food products may slump currently, so citizens would like to choose these food to eat and diminish their expenditure rather than utilizing these foods to reduce cholesterol. And citizens might even be benighted about the function of kiran. Consequently, without specifying some detailed evidence about the increment of the sales, the arguement is untenable.
Even if the survey and the increment is correct, they could not represent that citizens have adopted more healthful lifestyles, because there are numerous of methods to live a healthy life. If citizens always stay up pretty late and do not do some exercise such as playing basketball and jogging, they did not adopt a more healthful lifestyle. If people still eat junk food such as fried chicken and hamburgers, they are not living a healthy life. If some concrete evidences about how they adopt a more healthful lifestyle had been given, the conclusion of the argument would have become more persuasive. Therefore, to bolster the conclusion, some concrete evidence to delineate people's lives should be discussed.
In sum, the argument confidently presumes that citizens have adopted more healthful lifestyles. To strenthen the conclusion, more evidence about the survey, the increment of the sales and people's changes should be spedified.
Essay evaluation report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.0 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 27 15
No. of Words: 489 350
No. of Characters: 2571 1500
No. of Different Words: 211 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.702 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.258 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.776 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 201 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 160 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 124 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 69 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 18.111 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 7.51 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.667 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.324 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.494 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.12 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 428, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'citizens'' or 'citizen's'?
Suggestion: citizens'; citizen's
...aggerating the truth and absorbing more citizens attention to get more profits. In this ...
^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 325, Rule ID: ALLOW_TO[1]
Message: Did you mean 'proving'? Or maybe you should add a pronoun? In active voice, 'convince' + 'to' takes an object, usually a pronoun.
Suggestion: proving
...ot significant, which is not convincing to prove people are more healthier. Even though ...
^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 345, Rule ID: MOST_COMPARATIVE[2]
Message: Use only 'healthier' (without 'more') when you use the comparative.
Suggestion: healthier
...h is not convincing to prove people are more healthier. Even though the fourfold increment cer...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 595, Rule ID: THIS_NNS[2]
Message: Did you mean 'this food' or 'these foods'?
Suggestion: this food; these foods
...ently, so citizens would like to choose these food to eat and diminish their expenditure r...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 449, Rule ID: ENGLISH_WORD_REPEAT_BEGINNING_RULE
Message: Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Reword the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
...rs, they are not living a healthy life. If some concrete evidences about how they ...
^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
consequently, furthermore, hence, however, if, may, moreover, really, so, still, then, therefore, such as
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 21.0 19.6327345309 107% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 14.0 12.9520958084 108% => OK
Conjunction : 12.0 11.1786427146 107% => OK
Relative clauses : 7.0 13.6137724551 51% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 22.0 28.8173652695 76% => OK
Preposition: 55.0 55.5748502994 99% => OK
Nominalization: 27.0 16.3942115768 165% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2641.0 2260.96107784 117% => OK
No of words: 489.0 441.139720559 111% => OK
Chars per words: 5.40081799591 5.12650576532 105% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.70248278971 4.56307096286 103% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.89319296446 2.78398813304 104% => OK
Unique words: 219.0 204.123752495 107% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.447852760736 0.468620217663 96% => OK
syllable_count: 833.4 705.55239521 118% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.59920159681 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 6.0 4.96107784431 121% => OK
Article: 13.0 8.76447105788 148% => OK
Subordination: 9.0 2.70958083832 332% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 1.0 1.67365269461 60% => OK
Preposition: 7.0 4.22255489022 166% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 27.0 19.7664670659 137% => OK
Sentence length: 18.0 22.8473053892 79% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 48.285104361 57.8364921388 83% => OK
Chars per sentence: 97.8148148148 119.503703932 82% => OK
Words per sentence: 18.1111111111 23.324526521 78% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.88888888889 5.70786347227 68% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 5.0 5.25449101796 95% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 11.0 8.20758483034 134% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 7.0 6.88822355289 102% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 9.0 4.67664670659 192% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.318213003538 0.218282227539 146% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0898512286139 0.0743258471296 121% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.107032998374 0.0701772020484 153% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.213540725992 0.128457276422 166% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0893680241305 0.0628817314937 142% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.1 14.3799401198 91% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 44.75 48.3550499002 93% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.5 12.197005988 94% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.74 12.5979740519 109% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.27 8.32208582834 99% => OK
difficult_words: 116.0 98.500998004 118% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.5 12.3882235529 69% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.2 11.1389221557 83% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 11.9071856287 76% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.