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The best way for a society to prepare its young people for leadership in government, industry, or other fields is by instilling in them a sense of cooperation, not competition.Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree

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The best way for a society to prepare its young people for leadership in government, industry, or other fields is by instilling in them a sense of cooperation, not competition.

Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the claim. In developing and supporting your position, be sure to address the most compelling reasons and/or examples that could be used to challenge your position.

lucaskotw's picture

I agree that in order to cultivate young people, the government and industry should encourage these young people to comprehend the importance of cooperation. Nevertheless, the passage assert that the authorities should focus only on cooperation cultivation without competition. This policy might be flawed and without overall concern. Although the sense of cooperation is needed, the ability to cope with competition should also be considered.

Encouraging the young people to gain a sense of cooperation is important. First, cooperation is related to learning how to distribute the tasks and to schedule the time well. With a nice job assignment and clear schedule, the protential leaders could manipulate the upcomming challenge well. Second, cooperation brings up novel idea and encourages the group to achieve goal in innovative approaches. Giving the power to let the group members to raise their novel ideas, the potential leader could get easier to gather these innovative ideas and draw a better conclusion. Open source projects are nice representative examples. The online dedicator could follow up the community leaders and ends up with nice project, while bringing novel thoughts.

However, without considering the competition in reality could lead to some misery results. Firstly, the potential leaders would lack of the ability to cope with upcomming threat. Some conditions and counterparts may not be considered if the groups do not face with other competitive opponents. Second, considering only cooperation may lead to sloppy outcome. The potential leaders and their group members might focus on only to get the job done without refining and make their projects bear with future compliants.

In order to cultivate these young people with more comprehensive leadership, the government and idustry should consider other possible competitive factors. On one hand, these authorities should let these potential leaders coorperate with their group members to live up with certain standard. On the other hand, these authorities could cast a nitpicking judges to scruntize these potential leaders' sense of competition.

In short, although the sense of cooperation is important to cultivate young people for their leadership and has its merits, possible competition should be considered in these potential leaders' characteristics.

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Comments

Sentence: Nevertheless, the passage assert that the authorities should focus only on cooperation cultivation without competition.
Description: The fragment passage assert that is rare
Suggestion: Possible agreement error: Replace assert with verb, past tense

Sentence: With a nice job assignment and clear schedule, the protential leaders could manipulate the upcomming challenge well.
Error: upcomming Suggestion: upcoming
Error: protential Suggestion: No alternate word

Sentence: Firstly, the potential leaders would lack of the ability to cope with upcomming threat.
Error: upcomming Suggestion: upcoming

Sentence: The potential leaders and their group members might focus on only to get the job done without refining and make their projects bear with future compliants.
Error: compliants Suggestion: No alternate word

Sentence: In order to cultivate these young people with more comprehensive leadership, the government and idustry should consider other possible competitive factors.
Error: idustry Suggestion: industry

Sentence: On one hand, these authorities should let these potential leaders coorperate with their group members to live up with certain standard.
Error: coorperate Suggestion: cooperate

Sentence: On the other hand, these authorities could cast a nitpicking judges to scruntize these potential leaders' sense of competition.
Error: scruntize Suggestion: scrutiny

flaws:
No. of Different Words: 169 200
No. of Spelling Errors: 7 2

'On the other hand' means 'However'. It doesn't mean 'On another hand'.

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Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 3.0 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 1 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 7 2
No. of Sentences: 20 15
No. of Words: 353 350
No. of Characters: 1946 1500
No. of Different Words: 169 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.335 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.513 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.903 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 147 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 114 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 84 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 68 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 17.65 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 6.159 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.6 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.312 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.521 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.081 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5

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