"According to a recent report by our marketing department, during the past year, fewer people attended Super Screen produced movies than in any other year. And yet the percentage of positive reviews by movie reviewers about specific Super Screen movies actually increased during the last year. Clearly, the content of these reviews is not reaching enough of our prospective viewers. Thus, the problem lies not in the quality of our movies but with public's lack of awareness that movies of good quality are available. Super Screen should therefore allocate a greater quantity of its budget next year to reaching the public through advertising."
The author argument of spending more money on advertisement due to lack of public awareness for movie of good quality are available in Super Screen Movies is flawed. The argument is based on many assumption and author uses many cryptic words which make it more difficult to comprehend the argument.
First, the author need to answer the question regarding the why fewer people attended Super screen produced movie than in any other year. THere could be multiple reason, due to the online platform which discourages people to buy the tickets and watch movie. Furthermore, it might be due to economic crisis of the country and people are less spending on the recreational activities.
Author need to answered and define the vague word " fewer" , as the stats are not very clear and it cannot be used for getting into strong conclusion of recommending to have more budget for public advertisement. It might be thousand less people in 1 ten thousand people who came last year or thousand in 1 crore people who came last year. Both the scenarios are quite different and the plan of action will be different accordingly.
Moreover, the author need to mentioned the positive review percentage in the last year and whats the percentage in this year. As it could be case that earlier only 10 percent of people like it, so majority of people are not coming to watch the movies by Super Screen Movie Production Company and this year from the remaining people 30 percent people like it. Hence it says that in this cases, the quality of movie is of main concern rather than the advertisement. However if last year 80 percent of the people like it and this year 90 % of the people like it, than the advertisement might be the main concern.
In conclusion, the author need to answer the above question in order to get a better and clear perspective on the argument. Definf the stats and describing some of the vague words will strengthen the argument. And for these above reasons, I am not convinced with he argument.
Comments
e-rater score report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 6 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 3 2
No. of Sentences: 15 15
No. of Words: 348 350
No. of Characters: 1620 1500
No. of Different Words: 164 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.319 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.655 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.504 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 108 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 67 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 52 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 30 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 23.2 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 7.867 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.533 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.343 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.613 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.067 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 192, Rule ID: MANY_NN[1]
Message: Possible agreement error. The noun assumption seems to be countable; consider using: 'many assumptions'.
Suggestion: many assumptions
...ies is flawed. The argument is based on many assumption and author uses many cryptic words whic...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 57, Rule ID: THE_HOW[1]
Message: Did you mean 'why'?
Suggestion: why
...r need to answer the question regarding the why fewer people attended Super screen prod...
^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 69, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...define the vague word ' fewer' , as the stats are not very clear and it ...
^^
Line 5, column 235, Rule ID: NODT_DOZEN[1]
Message: Use simply: 'a thousand'.
Suggestion: a thousand
...t for public advertisement. It might be thousand less people in 1 ten thousand people wh...
^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 244, Rule ID: FEWER_LESS[2]
Message: Did you mean 'fewer'? The noun people is countable.
Suggestion: fewer
...lic advertisement. It might be thousand less people in 1 ten thousand people who cam...
^^^^
Line 5, column 303, Rule ID: NODT_DOZEN[1]
Message: Use simply: 'a thousand'.
Suggestion: a thousand
...n thousand people who came last year or thousand in 1 crore people who came last year. B...
^^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 92, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: what's
... review percentage in the last year and whats the percentage in this year. As it coul...
^^^^^
Line 7, column 360, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Hence,
...ining people 30 percent people like it. Hence it says that in this cases, the quality...
^^^^^
Line 7, column 382, Rule ID: THIS_NNS[1]
Message: Did you mean 'these'?
Suggestion: these
...t people like it. Hence it says that in this cases, the quality of movie is of main ...
^^^^
Line 7, column 465, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: However,
... concern rather than the advertisement. However if last year 80 percent of the people l...
^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 561, Rule ID: COMMA_THAN[1]
Message: Did you mean 'then'?
Suggestion: then
...d this year 90 % of the people like it, than the advertisement might be the main con...
^^^^
Line 9, column 157, Rule ID: SOME_OF_THE[1]
Message: Simply use 'some'.
Suggestion: some
...gument. Definf the stats and describing some of the vague words will strengthen the argumen...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 259, Rule ID: HE_THE[1]
Message: Did you mean 'with the argument'?
Suggestion: with the argument
...these above reasons, I am not convinced with he argument.
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
accordingly, first, furthermore, hence, however, if, moreover, regarding, so, then, in conclusion
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 15.0 19.6327345309 76% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 12.0 12.9520958084 93% => OK
Conjunction : 13.0 11.1786427146 116% => OK
Relative clauses : 6.0 13.6137724551 44% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 19.0 28.8173652695 66% => OK
Preposition: 49.0 55.5748502994 88% => OK
Nominalization: 14.0 16.3942115768 85% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1674.0 2260.96107784 74% => OK
No of words: 349.0 441.139720559 79% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.79656160458 5.12650576532 94% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.32221490584 4.56307096286 95% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.60625684375 2.78398813304 94% => OK
Unique words: 167.0 204.123752495 82% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.478510028653 0.468620217663 102% => OK
syllable_count: 515.7 705.55239521 73% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59920159681 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 3.0 4.96107784431 60% => OK
Article: 6.0 8.76447105788 68% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 2.70958083832 111% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.67365269461 60% => OK
Preposition: 1.0 4.22255489022 24% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 15.0 19.7664670659 76% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 23.0 22.8473053892 101% => OK
Sentence length SD: 43.7332317072 57.8364921388 76% => OK
Chars per sentence: 111.6 119.503703932 93% => OK
Words per sentence: 23.2666666667 23.324526521 100% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.46666666667 5.70786347227 113% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 13.0 5.25449101796 247% => Less language errors wanted.
Sentences with positive sentiment : 7.0 8.20758483034 85% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 6.88822355289 73% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.67664670659 64% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.276407005625 0.218282227539 127% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0925431269192 0.0743258471296 125% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.113924192888 0.0701772020484 162% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.141636888128 0.128457276422 110% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.103544580005 0.0628817314937 165% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.8 14.3799401198 89% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 56.59 48.3550499002 117% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.1 12.197005988 91% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.86 12.5979740519 86% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.63 8.32208582834 92% => OK
difficult_words: 63.0 98.500998004 64% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 12.3882235529 89% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.2 11.1389221557 101% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 11.9071856287 92% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.