Arctic deer live on islands in Canada's arctic regions. They search for food by moving over ice from island to island during the course of the year. Their habitat is limited to areas warm enough to sustain the plants on which they feed and cold enough, at least some of the year, for the ice to cover the sea separating the islands, allowing the deer to travel over it. Unfortunately, according to reports from local hunters, the deer populations are declining. Since these reports coincide with recent global warming trends that have caused the sea ice to melt, we can conclude that the purported decline in deer populations is the result of the deer's being unable to follow their age-old migration patterns across the frozen sea.
In the prompt, the author concludes that global warming is the major cause of the decline of the population of deer in the arctic region. He believes that global warming trends have caused the sea ice to melt due to which deer aren’t able to migrate to over the frozen sea according to the reports of local hunters which further led to the decline of the population of the species. However, the author supports his conclusion on three (3) assumptions that if substantiated, dramatically weaken the persuasiveness of the argument.
First of all, the author assumes that due to trend of global warming sea ice is declining, however, he doesn’t consider the fact that due to increase in global warming, warm areas in arctic oceans are also rising at a frequently high rate, due to which plant vegetation has increased in the recent times. Due to this reason, deer might not have to migrate over to other areas where most of the hunters might usually find them and thus, the report given by the local hunters might stand fallacious. From this, we can derive that the author assumption might stand false.
Secondly, the author believes deer are not able to follow their age-old migration patterns across the frozen sea is the major cause of their population being declined. However, he doesn’t consider the fact that due to the increase in temperature the deer might not be able to survive the high temperature or have caught a new disease that local hunters are unaware of. For instance, in 2002, some believed that decline in the population of Asiatic Lion in India is due to increase in the temperature, however, the major reason of the decline was the illegal poaching activities and hunting of the lions by the local hunters. If, the above example here stands true than it might be possible that the reason of decline might be the increase of hunting activities by the local hunters, which, indeed are providing the false reports to cover up their illegal activities.
Finally, the author assumes that the survival of deer is based on migration from one region to other. But this contemporary information regarding deer might not stand true. The current species of deer might be more inclined towards staying at a single place rather than migrating across the frozen sea. Since due to various regions each species has to evolve to overcome the uncertainties that the environment throws at them. For example, the water-born animals like a dolphin and other species of fish have changed so much in the last decade and even new species have also arrived due to changes in the environment. So, presuming that what is followed a decade before and the same if not occurring a decade later will provide false information. Thus, there might be various factors that might have led to the decline of the population of deer other than global warming that the author doesn’t consider in the prompt.
In conclusion, the argument, as it stands now, is considerably flawed due to its reliance on several unwarranted assumptions. If the author can justify these arguments, then the prompt might stand true and hence will have conclusive evidence.
Comments
e-rater score report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 4.0 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 19 15
No. of Words: 537 350
No. of Characters: 2541 1500
No. of Different Words: 221 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.814 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.732 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.492 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 180 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 130 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 69 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 44 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 28.263 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 11.929 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.737 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.361 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.555 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.16 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 7, column 304, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “Since” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...r than migrating across the frozen sea. Since due to various regions each species has...
^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, finally, first, hence, however, if, regarding, second, secondly, so, then, thus, as to, for example, for instance, in conclusion, first of all
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 18.0 19.6327345309 92% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 16.0 12.9520958084 124% => OK
Conjunction : 8.0 11.1786427146 72% => OK
Relative clauses : 19.0 13.6137724551 140% => OK
Pronoun: 32.0 28.8173652695 111% => OK
Preposition: 80.0 55.5748502994 144% => OK
Nominalization: 18.0 16.3942115768 110% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2616.0 2260.96107784 116% => OK
No of words: 533.0 441.139720559 121% => OK
Chars per words: 4.90806754221 5.12650576532 96% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.80487177365 4.56307096286 105% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.58262093656 2.78398813304 93% => OK
Unique words: 237.0 204.123752495 116% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.444652908068 0.468620217663 95% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 808.2 705.55239521 115% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59920159681 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 4.0 4.96107784431 81% => OK
Article: 11.0 8.76447105788 126% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 2.70958083832 111% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.67365269461 60% => OK
Preposition: 5.0 4.22255489022 118% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 19.0 19.7664670659 96% => OK
Sentence length: 28.0 22.8473053892 123% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 62.7315875581 57.8364921388 108% => OK
Chars per sentence: 137.684210526 119.503703932 115% => OK
Words per sentence: 28.0526315789 23.324526521 120% => OK
Discourse Markers: 8.05263157895 5.70786347227 141% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 5.25449101796 19% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 8.0 8.20758483034 97% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 6.88822355289 73% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 6.0 4.67664670659 128% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.101194687342 0.218282227539 46% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.037245658494 0.0743258471296 50% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0348201963718 0.0701772020484 50% => Sentences are similar to each other.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0631528746516 0.128457276422 49% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0397929585582 0.0628817314937 63% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 15.7 14.3799401198 109% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 51.52 48.3550499002 107% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 13.0 12.197005988 107% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.49 12.5979740519 91% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.28 8.32208582834 99% => OK
difficult_words: 110.0 98.500998004 112% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 14.0 12.3882235529 113% => OK
gunning_fog: 13.2 11.1389221557 119% => OK
text_standard: 14.0 11.9071856287 118% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.