The following appeared in a health magazine published in Corpora."Medical experts say that only one-quarter of Corpora's citizens meet the current standards for adequate physical fitness, even though twenty years ago, one-half of all of Corpora's citizens

Essay topics:

The following appeared in a health magazine published in Corpora.

"Medical experts say that only one-quarter of Corpora's citizens meet the current standards for adequate physical fitness, even though twenty years ago, one-half of all of Corpora's citizens met the standards as then defined. But these experts are mistaken when they suggest that spending too much time using computers has caused a decline in fitness. Since overall fitness levels are highest in regions of Corpora where levels of computer ownership are also highest, it is clear that using computers has not made citizens less physically fit. Instead, as shown by this year's unusually low expenditures on fitness-related products and services, the recent decline in the economy is most likely the cause, and fitness levels will improve when the economy does."

This argument seems plausible at the beginning but is not well articulated. Many factors in the argument are not well defined. Further, to know more about the passage we must stead it in a detail considering all the evidences.
Primarily, the fitness status of the Corpora’s citizens is noted as a quarter of total population, which was 50%, about 20 years back. Comparison is made by the author amongst two irrelevant sources. Fitness levels about twenty years back are nothing but staying healthy without any issues regarding your body. The level of fitness has differed at a large extent from then to now. Now one is supposed to have a fit body and is also expected to go to gym every day, and if they manage to have a 6 pack or good structure that would be more effective. Whereas, this wasn’t the scenario 20 years back, nothing was expected from the people but just to be healthy. This comparison is equipped with flaws.
Secondly, overall fitness levels are marked highest in the highest computer owned regions, which might not necessarily imply that the people in the computer owned region are just fit without doing any fitness activities. Not having a computer while not doing the fitness regime wouldn’t help! In the same way having a computer and not doing a fitness regime is also helpless. One has to be aware of their fitness and work accordingly. Having or not having a computer wouldn’t make much of a difference. Yes! There might be a problem with the computers as one has to sit continuously in front of it to operate which would have a negative effect on the body, but we do not know how many hours are they operating. The case of having a computer and not using it is also to be considered.
Finally, author says that the economy has had a great effect on the purchase of fitness instruments, which resulted in very few sales. The economy implies the whole country and not just a single city. As we are talking about a single city the clauses might differ. The economy changes from city to city. Further, the author says fitness equipment’s have not been purchased which caused decrease in the fitness of the population. One who is interested in getting fit doesn’t wait to purchase the equipment but goes out to the gym and works. The fee for gym per month can be chosen according to the wish of the person, as we have enormous number of gyms available out there. It shows the lack of interest in the people. There are many more factors which are to be known to trace the actual reason behind the decrease in the fitness and to evaluate the argument.
To sum up, concluding that, economy has to increase to have a better fitness is absurd. The argument seems to lack a good stand. Author has to take care of many other factors before coming to a conclusion.

Votes
Average: 6.6 (1 vote)
Essay Categories

Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 4, column 202, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “As” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...ole country and not just a single city. As we are talking about a single city the ...
^^
Line 4, column 591, Rule ID: AFFORD_VBG[1]
Message: This verb is used with infinitive: 'to accord'.
Suggestion: to accord
...The fee for gym per month can be chosen according to the wish of the person, as we have e...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 207, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... factors before coming to a conclusion.
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

Discourse Markers used:
['accordingly', 'also', 'but', 'finally', 'if', 'regarding', 'second', 'secondly', 'so', 'then', 'well', 'whereas', 'while', 'as to', 'talking about', 'to sum up', 'in the same way']

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance in Part of Speech:
Nouns: 0.219683655536 0.25644967241 86% => OK
Verbs: 0.188049209139 0.15541462614 121% => OK
Adjectives: 0.0685413005272 0.0836205057962 82% => OK
Adverbs: 0.0615114235501 0.0520304965353 118% => OK
Pronouns: 0.0210896309315 0.0272364105082 77% => OK
Prepositions: 0.0949033391916 0.125424944231 76% => OK
Participles: 0.0615114235501 0.0416121511921 148% => OK
Conjunctions: 2.61040778476 2.79052419416 94% => OK
Infinitives: 0.0421792618629 0.026700313972 158% => OK
Particles: 0.00351493848858 0.001811407834 194% => OK
Determiners: 0.112478031634 0.113004496875 100% => OK
Modal_auxiliary: 0.01230228471 0.0255425247493 48% => OK
WH_determiners: 0.0158172231986 0.0127820249294 124% => OK

Vocabulary words and sentences:
No of characters: 2829.0 2731.13054187 104% => OK
No of words: 498.0 446.07635468 112% => OK
Chars per words: 5.68072289157 6.12365571057 93% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.72397222731 4.57801047555 103% => OK
words length more than 5 chars: 0.317269076305 0.378187486979 84% => OK
words length more than 6 chars: 0.234939759036 0.287650121315 82% => OK
words length more than 7 chars: 0.146586345382 0.208842608468 70% => OK
words length more than 8 chars: 0.078313253012 0.135150697306 58% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.61040778476 2.79052419416 94% => OK
Unique words: 234.0 207.018472906 113% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.469879518072 0.469332199767 100% => OK
Word variations: 54.1151965037 52.1807786196 104% => OK
How many sentences: 30.0 20.039408867 150% => OK
Sentence length: 16.6 23.2022227129 72% => OK
Sentence length SD: 48.4953147794 57.7814097925 84% => OK
Chars per sentence: 94.3 141.986410481 66% => OK
Words per sentence: 16.6 23.2022227129 72% => OK
Discourse Markers: 0.566666666667 0.724660767414 78% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.14285714286 97% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 3.58251231527 84% => OK
Readability: 40.0939759036 51.9672348444 77% => OK
Elegance: 1.38961038961 1.8405768891 75% => OK

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.284292645391 0.441005458295 64% => OK
Sentence sentence coherence: 0.115958686275 0.135418324435 86% => OK
Sentence sentence coherence SD: 0.0994952424865 0.0829849096947 120% => OK
Sentence paragraph coherence: 0.497271359737 0.58762219726 85% => OK
Sentence paragraph coherence SD: 0.148639029041 0.147661913831 101% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.100819261651 0.193483328276 52% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0723070809097 0.0970749176394 74% => OK
Paragraph paragraph coherence: 0.347586002397 0.42659136922 81% => OK
Paragraph paragraph coherence SD: 0.096942273334 0.0774707102158 125% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.170569893301 0.312017818177 55% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0727557494921 0.0698173142475 104% => OK

Task Achievement:
Sentences with positive sentiment : 15.0 8.33743842365 180% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 7.0 6.87684729064 102% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 8.0 4.82512315271 166% => OK
Positive topic words: 9.0 6.46551724138 139% => OK
Negative topic words: 6.0 5.36822660099 112% => OK
Neutral topic words: 5.0 2.82389162562 177% => OK
Total topic words: 20.0 14.657635468 136% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

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Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6 -- The score is based on the average performance of 20,000 argument essays. This e-grader is not smart enough to check on arguments.
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Note: This is not the final score. The e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.