The following appeared in a memo from New Ventures Consulting to the president of HobCo, Inc., a chain of hobby shops.
"Our team has completed its research on suitable building sites for a new HobCo hobby Shop in the city of Grilldon. We discovered that there are currently no hobby shops in southeastern Grilldon. When our researchers conducted a poll of area residents, 88 percent of those who responded indicated that they would welcome the opening of a hobby shop in southeastern Grilldon. Grilldon is in a region of the nation in which the hobby business has increased by 300 percent during the past decade. In addition, Grilldon has a very large population of retirees, a demographic with ample time to devote to hobbies. We therefore recommend that you choose southeastern Grilldon as the site for your next HobCo Hobby Shop. We predict that a shop in this area will draw a steady stream of enthusiastic new HobCo customers."
Write a response in which you discuss what questions would need to be answered in order to decide whether the recommendation is likely to have the predicted result. Be sure to explain how the answers to these questions would help to evaluate the recommendation.
It seems to be logical, at first glance, to agree with the idea that creating Hobby Shop in the southeastern Grilldon will be a profitable idea. However, the argument relies on less credible evidence or even doubtful assumption to consolidates its stance. In what follows, I will elaborate them in details.
Citing the number of people who agree with the building hobby shop, the author everts that creating Hobby shop would be the beneficent idea in the southeastern Gildon. Without knowing the demographical characteristics of the responders making this conclusion is disingenuous. Maybe the most...
Subscribe as testbig VIP readers and get unlimited access to essays on the top list.
Comments
Essay evaluation report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 5.5 out of 6
Category: Excellent Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 25 15
No. of Words: 576 350
No. of Characters: 2908 1500
No. of Different Words: 239 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.899 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.049 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.859 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 197 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 156 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 112 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 72 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 23.04 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 11.126 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.44 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.321 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.516 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.187 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 1019, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...residents of the southeastern Grilldon. Further, even we assuming that the demog...
^^^
Line 4, column 18, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'details'' or 'detail's'?
Suggestion: details'; detail's
...tatus on those years. Even we know the details information of increasing rates in the ...
^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 337, Rule ID: ADMIT_ENJOY_VB[1]
Message: This verb is used with the gerund form: 'recommended having'.
Suggestion: recommended having
... the argument as a whole, it is greatly recommended to have more other influencing factors that imp...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, besides, but, finally, first, furthermore, however, if, may, moreover, so, for instance, such as
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 23.0 19.6327345309 117% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 6.0 12.9520958084 46% => OK
Conjunction : 9.0 11.1786427146 81% => OK
Relative clauses : 14.0 13.6137724551 103% => OK
Pronoun: 41.0 28.8173652695 142% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 92.0 55.5748502994 166% => OK
Nominalization: 16.0 16.3942115768 98% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2992.0 2260.96107784 132% => OK
No of words: 576.0 441.139720559 131% => OK
Chars per words: 5.19444444444 5.12650576532 101% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.89897948557 4.56307096286 107% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.97440980957 2.78398813304 107% => OK
Unique words: 251.0 204.123752495 123% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.435763888889 0.468620217663 93% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 948.6 705.55239521 134% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 11.0 4.96107784431 222% => Less pronouns wanted as sentence beginning.
Article: 6.0 8.76447105788 68% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 2.70958083832 37% => OK
Conjunction: 5.0 1.67365269461 299% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 9.0 4.22255489022 213% => Less preposition wanted as sentence beginnings.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 25.0 19.7664670659 126% => OK
Sentence length: 23.0 22.8473053892 101% => OK
Sentence length SD: 70.336175614 57.8364921388 122% => OK
Chars per sentence: 119.68 119.503703932 100% => OK
Words per sentence: 23.04 23.324526521 99% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.08 5.70786347227 71% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 5.25449101796 57% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 11.0 8.20758483034 134% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 6.0 6.88822355289 87% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 8.0 4.67664670659 171% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.159645123655 0.218282227539 73% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0555855628835 0.0743258471296 75% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0358417051052 0.0701772020484 51% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0972888865123 0.128457276422 76% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0268937963656 0.0628817314937 43% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.5 14.3799401198 101% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 48.13 48.3550499002 100% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.3 12.197005988 101% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.12 12.5979740519 104% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.31 8.32208582834 100% => OK
difficult_words: 129.0 98.500998004 131% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.5 12.3882235529 69% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.2 11.1389221557 101% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 11.9071856287 76% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.