The following appeared in a memo from the new vice president of Sartorian, a company that manufactures men’s clothing.
“Five years ago, at a time when we had difficulties in obtaining reliable supplies of high-quality wool fabric, we discontinued production of our
alpaca overcoat. Now that we have a new fabric supplier, we should resume
production. This coat should sell very well: since we have not offered an
alpaca overcoat for five years and since our major competitor no longer
makes an alpaca overcoat, there will be pent-up customer demand. Also,
since the price of most types of clothing has increased in each of the past five
years, customers should be willing to pay significantly higher prices for
alpaca overcoats than they did five years ago, and our company profits will
increase.”
Write a response in which you discuss what specific evidence is needed to
evaluate the argument and explain how the evidence would weaken or
strengthen the argument.
The new vice president of Sartorian deliberates to resume their alpaca overcoat production as they have found new fabric supplier. In the past five years, as the price of most of clothing has augmented, the president implies that people ought to be willing to pay more price for alpaca overcoats than they did which will increase their profit level. The president is too early to assume that circumstances between these five years have not changed; their company profits will be augmented after they restart to produce the alpaca overcoats.
The new vice president of sartorian posits that there is still the same level of demand for alpaca overcoats as they used to be. Perhaps, dressing sense of people changes over the five years. Maybe, other more attractive design of coat covers the market even with fewer prices. He should consider the lifestyle of people before and after five years. Before restarting to make these overcoats, he had better research market trend or customer requirement. However, their competitor did not make these overcoats anymore might be because of people no more wearing these overcoat or informal dress has overtaken the place of alpaca overcoat. If the above is true, then the argument does not hold water.
Without ruminating about other details, the president concluded that their company profit increases as most type of clothing price has increased. Perhaps, the expenses require making these overcoats increases which make the selling price of these overcoats even more. But people might have switch to less expensive products. The president had better thought about production cost; whether the material required making alpaca overcoats have increased or decreased. He should have evaluated the production and selling price before reaching to the assertion. If he does not address these details, the conclusion drawn in the original argument is significantly weakend.
The president presumes that a new fabric supplier will provide the same high quality wool fabric they used in making these overcoats. He also assumes that this supplier is reliable. He had already discontinued the production of these overcoats in the past due to unavailability of reliable supplier. So, he must pay special attention towards the quality and reliability of fabric materials before restarting these overcoats production.
Many specifics still need to be considered by the president before arriving at conclusion. He should not assume that people still want to wear these overcoats without appraisal of market demand and competitor. He ought to have analysis his customer interest which could have changed over 5 years of interval. He should not be too quick to judge that these overcoats included in the most of clothing price which has augmented and supplier of fabric materials is reliable.
Comments
e-rater score report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 4.5 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 7 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 4 2
No. of Sentences: 24 15
No. of Words: 448 350
No. of Characters: 2327 1500
No. of Different Words: 193 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.601 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.194 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.536 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 179 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 133 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 98 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 63 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 18.667 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 7.186 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.375 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.319 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.319 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.153 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 1 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 279, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...vers the market even with fewer prices. He should consider the lifestyle of peop...
^^^^^^
Line 2, column 567, Rule ID: THIS_NNS[2]
Message: Did you mean 'this overcoat' or 'these overcoats'?
Suggestion: this overcoat; these overcoats
...ht be because of people no more wearing these overcoat or informal dress has overtaken the pla...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 4, column 414, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[2]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'overcoats'' or 'overcoat's'?
Suggestion: overcoats'; overcoat's
...abric materials before restarting these overcoats production. Many specifics still need ...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 309, Rule ID: ENGLISH_WORD_REPEAT_BEGINNING_RULE
Message: Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Reword the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
... have changed over 5 years of interval. He should not be too quick to judge that t...
^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, however, if, may, so, still, then
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 12.0 19.6327345309 61% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 14.0 12.9520958084 108% => OK
Conjunction : 9.0 11.1786427146 81% => OK
Relative clauses : 12.0 13.6137724551 88% => OK
Pronoun: 42.0 28.8173652695 146% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 58.0 55.5748502994 104% => OK
Nominalization: 10.0 16.3942115768 61% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2374.0 2260.96107784 105% => OK
No of words: 448.0 441.139720559 102% => OK
Chars per words: 5.29910714286 5.12650576532 103% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.60065326758 4.56307096286 101% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.61079428742 2.78398813304 94% => OK
Unique words: 203.0 204.123752495 99% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.453125 0.468620217663 97% => OK
syllable_count: 741.6 705.55239521 105% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.59920159681 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 11.0 4.96107784431 222% => Less pronouns wanted as sentence beginning.
Article: 9.0 8.76447105788 103% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 2.70958083832 148% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.67365269461 60% => OK
Preposition: 3.0 4.22255489022 71% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 24.0 19.7664670659 121% => OK
Sentence length: 18.0 22.8473053892 79% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 42.7430956088 57.8364921388 74% => OK
Chars per sentence: 98.9166666667 119.503703932 83% => OK
Words per sentence: 18.6666666667 23.324526521 80% => OK
Discourse Markers: 1.83333333333 5.70786347227 32% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 4.0 5.25449101796 76% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 10.0 8.20758483034 122% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 6.88822355289 58% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 10.0 4.67664670659 214% => Less facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.13774298525 0.218282227539 63% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0475471475632 0.0743258471296 64% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0506073261752 0.0701772020484 72% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0927916289688 0.128457276422 72% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0455852279474 0.0628817314937 72% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.9 14.3799401198 90% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 44.75 48.3550499002 93% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.5 12.197005988 94% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.46 12.5979740519 107% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.95 8.32208582834 96% => OK
difficult_words: 97.0 98.500998004 98% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 13.0 12.3882235529 105% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.2 11.1389221557 83% => OK
text_standard: 13.0 11.9071856287 109% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 58.33 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.5 Out of 6
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.