The vice president of Quiot Manufacturing proposes a new policy hoping to lower the number of on-the-job accidents at Quiot and improve productivity in the meantime by shortening work shift. The idea seems plausible at the first glance, yet some problematic assumptions needed to be addressed to make the point more solid.
The men mentions 30 percent more on-the-job accidents happened at Panoply since their work shifts are less than Quiot’s. However, this viewpoint is questionable because more detailed numbers and information should be provided. Even if we have known Panoply has 30 percent more accidents happened during the work, we still need the exact number to prove the credibility. If Panopy only has ten employee and they got three people injured during the work, it is less persuadable for Quiot, a company with more than 1 million employees to learn a lesson from a such company with the different size. Besides, maybe Panopy is specialized in a different manufacturing area that needs more complicated working process. For example, employees in semiconductor industry will definitely have higher risk of on-the-job accidents compared to car manufacturing, according to Economics magazine. Even if Panoply and Quiot are in the same industry, maybe the equipments at Panoply are more outdated and that's why they have more accidents.
The vice president believe that shortening the work shifts can lead to better productivity and less fatigue on work. Nonetheless, we need to look into the assumption deeply in order to make the perfect decision. Even if worker at Quiot have less work hours, it might actually cause more fatigue at the same time. As employees have more free time between the shifts, some people may like to play games, watch TV shows to be relax. The more entertainment activities they are involved, the more tiredness they will have. The spokesmen should not assume more leisure time equals to more energies among worker unless he could be 100 percent sure all of employee will take a rest between the shifts. Moreover, when the vice president cuts the one hour in each shift and keeps the daily KPI the same, it means every worker needs to maximize they dedication on the work or they cannot fulfill the daily goal. Thus maybe more and more workers will be under the pressure, and the failure rates on job might get higher. This is definitely not what the company expects.
To sum it up, a memo written by the vice president appears to be sound, yet the vice president should provide more credentials to support the unsubstantiated points mentioned in the article.
Essay evaluation report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 18 15
No. of Words: 432 350
No. of Characters: 2126 1500
No. of Different Words: 223 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.559 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.921 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.645 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 143 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 110 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 73 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 52 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 24 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 8.498 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.667 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.341 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.495 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.098 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 1, Rule ID: ENGLISH_WORD_REPEAT_BEGINNING_RULE
Message: Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Reword the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
...ressed to make the point more solid. The men mentions 30 percent more on-the-job...
^^^
Line 3, column 9, Rule ID: AGREEMENT_SENT_START[1]
Message: You should probably use 'mention'.
Suggestion: mention
...o make the point more solid. The men mentions 30 percent more on-the-job accidents ha...
^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 399, Rule ID: CD_NN[1]
Message: Possible agreement error. The noun 'employee' seems to be countable, so consider using: 'employees'.
Suggestion: employees
...the credibility. If Panopy only has ten employee and they got three people injured durin...
^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 993, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: that's
...pments at Panoply are more outdated and thats why they have more accidents. The v...
^^^^^
Line 5, column 902, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Thus,
... or they cannot fulfill the daily goal. Thus maybe more and more workers will be und...
^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
actually, besides, first, however, if, look, may, moreover, nonetheless, so, still, thus, for example
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 14.0 19.6327345309 71% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 15.0 12.9520958084 116% => OK
Conjunction : 12.0 11.1786427146 107% => OK
Relative clauses : 3.0 13.6137724551 22% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 19.0 28.8173652695 66% => OK
Preposition: 55.0 55.5748502994 99% => OK
Nominalization: 4.0 16.3942115768 24% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2184.0 2260.96107784 97% => OK
No of words: 432.0 441.139720559 98% => OK
Chars per words: 5.05555555556 5.12650576532 99% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.55901411391 4.56307096286 100% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.73008438847 2.78398813304 98% => OK
Unique words: 230.0 204.123752495 113% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.532407407407 0.468620217663 114% => OK
syllable_count: 683.1 705.55239521 97% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 7.0 4.96107784431 141% => OK
Article: 9.0 8.76447105788 103% => OK
Subordination: 6.0 2.70958083832 221% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 3.0 1.67365269461 179% => OK
Preposition: 2.0 4.22255489022 47% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 19.0 19.7664670659 96% => OK
Sentence length: 22.0 22.8473053892 96% => OK
Sentence length SD: 44.4501650674 57.8364921388 77% => OK
Chars per sentence: 114.947368421 119.503703932 96% => OK
Words per sentence: 22.7368421053 23.324526521 97% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.31578947368 5.70786347227 93% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 5.15768463074 78% => More paragraphs wanted.
Language errors: 5.0 5.25449101796 95% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 8.0 8.20758483034 97% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 10.0 6.88822355289 145% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 4.67664670659 21% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.331490291628 0.218282227539 152% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.103101121857 0.0743258471296 139% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0916062037465 0.0701772020484 131% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.204408400786 0.128457276422 159% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0640597995509 0.0628817314937 102% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.8 14.3799401198 96% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 49.15 48.3550499002 102% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.9 12.197005988 98% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.36 12.5979740519 98% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.09 8.32208582834 97% => OK
difficult_words: 92.0 98.500998004 93% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 12.3882235529 89% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.8 11.1389221557 97% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 11.9071856287 92% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 58.33 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.5 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.