The following appeared in a memorandum from the owner of Movies Galore, a chain of movie-rental stores."Because of declining profits, we must reduce operating expenses at Movies Galore's ten movie-rental stores. Raising prices is not a good option, since

Essay topics: The following appeared in a memorandum from the owner of Movies Galore, a chain of movie-rental stores.
"Because of declining profits, we must reduce operating expenses at Movies Galore's ten movie-rental stores. Raising prices is not a good option, since we are famous for our low prices. Instead, we should reduce our operating hours. Last month our store in downtown Marston reduced its hours by closing at 6:00 p.m. rather than 9:00 p.m. and reduced its overall inventory by no longer stocking any DVD released more than five years ago. Since we have received very few customer complaints about these new policies, we should now adopt them at all other Movies Galore stores as our best strategies for improving profits."
Write a response in which you discuss what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument and explain how the evidence would weaken or strengthen the argument.

pooja96's picture

The argument states that by reducing all the store’s hours and reducing its overall inventory by no longer stocking any DVD released more than five years ago as it did in a store in downtown Marston, Movies Galore stores would be able to improve its profits. There is a lot of evidence that is needed to evaluate the argument and for its prediction to come true.

According to the memorandum, the timings of the store should be reduced to 6:00 pm instead of 9:00 pm, but it may be possible that people may be visiting the store more between 6:00 pm and 9:00 pm and there could be a loss instead of profit. Only because it worked in downtown Marston it does not mean that it would work in all the stores. The store in Marston is in downtown, so mostly people come there for work which could be why there would be few customers between 6:00 pm and 9:00 pm. However the other stores of Movies Galore could be near residential areas where there could be more customers between 6:00 pm and 9:00 pm and if it is so, then Movies Galore may find themselves having a loss instead of profit.

The argument also states that Movies Galore should reduce its overall inventory by no longer stocking any DVD released more than five years ago. This worked in the store in downtown Marston so they assume that it would work in all other stores as well. It is possible that because the store is in downtown, younger people come to that store and so most did not complain about this new policy. Movies Galore needs to check how many customers rent DVDs that released more than five years ago. If the number is less, then they should go ahead but if the number is high then they should rethink the strategy.

The strategy worked in downtown Marston but it may not work in all the stores. All the stores are in different localities which makes a lot of difference. It depends on the localities at what time more customers visit and what type of movies they enjoy watching. The timings of the stores should be decided according to the locality. Movies Galore also needs to see how many customers visit the downtown Marston store. It could be that very few people visit the store which may be why there have been few complains.

There is a lot of evidence that is needed to get more profit for Movies Galore stores. Had the argument stated the number of customers that visit the store between 6:00 pm and 9:00 pm and how many people rent movies that were released before five years, the argument would have been more convincing.

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Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 492, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: However,
... customers between 6:00 pm and 9:00 pm. However the other stores of Movies Galore could...
^^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, however, if, may, so, then, well

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 26.0 19.6327345309 132% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 20.0 12.9520958084 154% => OK
Conjunction : 14.0 11.1786427146 125% => OK
Relative clauses : 17.0 13.6137724551 125% => OK
Pronoun: 35.0 28.8173652695 121% => OK
Preposition: 46.0 55.5748502994 83% => OK
Nominalization: 9.0 16.3942115768 55% => More nominalization wanted.

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2067.0 2260.96107784 91% => OK
No of words: 458.0 441.139720559 104% => OK
Chars per words: 4.51310043668 5.12650576532 88% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.62611441266 4.56307096286 101% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.20667189461 2.78398813304 79% => OK
Unique words: 157.0 204.123752495 77% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.342794759825 0.468620217663 73% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 628.2 705.55239521 89% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.4 1.59920159681 88% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 4.0 4.96107784431 81% => OK
Interrogative: 0.0 0.471057884232 0% => OK
Article: 7.0 8.76447105788 80% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 2.70958083832 37% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.67365269461 60% => OK
Preposition: 1.0 4.22255489022 24% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 19.0 19.7664670659 96% => OK
Sentence length: 24.0 22.8473053892 105% => OK
Sentence length SD: 58.669882603 57.8364921388 101% => OK
Chars per sentence: 108.789473684 119.503703932 91% => OK
Words per sentence: 24.1052631579 23.324526521 103% => OK
Discourse Markers: 2.26315789474 5.70786347227 40% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 5.25449101796 19% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 9.0 8.20758483034 110% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 6.88822355289 44% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 7.0 4.67664670659 150% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.129703708183 0.218282227539 59% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0559760236416 0.0743258471296 75% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0576280228246 0.0701772020484 82% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0958619990593 0.128457276422 75% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0213684311131 0.0628817314937 34% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.9 14.3799401198 83% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 64.04 48.3550499002 132% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.3 12.197005988 84% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 9.17 12.5979740519 73% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 6.69 8.32208582834 80% => OK
difficult_words: 54.0 98.500998004 55% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 17.5 12.3882235529 141% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.6 11.1389221557 104% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 11.9071856287 101% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6 -- The score is based on the average performance of 20,000 argument essays. This e-grader is not smart enough to check on arguments.
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.

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