The following appeared as a recommendation by a committee planning a ten-year budget for the city of Calatrava.
"The birthrate in our city is declining: in fact, last year's birthrate was only one-half that of five years ago. Thus the number of students enrolled in our public schools will soon decrease dramatically, and we can safely reduce the funds budgeted for education during the next decade. At the same time, we can reduce funding for athletic playing fields and other recreational facilities. As a result, we will have sufficient money to fund city facilities and programs used primarily by adults, since we can expect the adult population of the city to increase."
Write a response in which you discuss what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument and explain how the evidence would weaken or strengthen the argument.
The author concludes here that since there is a decline in birthrate from past five years so substaintial amount of funds should be reduced from school as well as athletics playing field so that they can devote it for adults in the city. At first glance, the author's argument appears to be convincing, but further reflection reveals that it's based on some dubious assumptions. The author fails to provide proper evidences and examples on the basis of which this argument can be evaluted.
First of all, the author assums the decline in population of children from past five years continues for next ten years as well. Although, it could be possible that the population of children could increase drastically in next ten years and the effort of reducing the number of resources for students as well as atheletes become futile. For example, if there adult population is higher currently in the city, then definitely the birth rate will going to increase in the future. Presumably, the possibility of children to transfer from other city to this city could also be possible for the increase in population after few years. Thus, if the author has provided some more information about different age groups of people who are currently living in the city, the argument would have been more convincing.
Secondly, the author didn't mention anything about the usage of athletics playing field as well as recreational facilities. Since most of the adults love sports and wants to stay fit, it could be possible that the adults living currently in the city are also using those fields and recreational facilities at greater extent. For example, In most of counties, all the adults like to play football and imitate the best players of their time. Hence, without having much information about the current usage of athletics playing ground, it's funding should not be declined.
At last, the author assumes that the adult population will be expected to increase in the next ten years. Furthermore, the author also mentioned that there is a decline in current population of children. However, it's impossible that the decline in children population will enhance the number of adults in future. For instance, if the population of children of age from 10 to 15 is already declining, then the possibility of adult age from 20 to 25 will also gets declined in future. Hence, the author should provide the information about the number of adults who're already there in the city as well as the number of childern who're using those athletics playing fields and recreational facilites so as to give the proper direction to budget of the city of Calatrava.
In conclusion, the author's argument is unpersuasive as it stands. To bolster it further, the author must provide clear concrete evidences to devote the city budget for the facilities used by adults, perhaps by the suitable analysis of the age group and usage of athletics playing fields as well as recreational activites. Finally, to better evaluate the argument, it would be necessary to know more information about the number of children and the number of adults who are using the current city facilities.
Comments
Essay evaluation report
Sentence: The author concludes here that since there is a decline in birthrate from past five years so substaintial amount of funds should be reduced from school as well as athletics playing field so that they can devote it for adults in the city.
Error: substaintial Suggestion: substantial
Sentence: The author fails to provide proper evidences and examples on the basis of which this argument can be evaluted.
Error: evaluted Suggestion: evaluated
Sentence: First of all, the author assums the decline in population of children from past five years continues for next ten years as well.
Error: assums Suggestion: No alternate word
Sentence: Although, it could be possible that the population of children could increase drastically in next ten years and the effort of reducing the number of resources for students as well as atheletes become futile.
Error: atheletes Suggestion: athletes
Sentence: Hence, the author should provide the information about the number of adults who're already there in the city as well as the number of childern who're using those athletics playing fields and recreational facilites so as to give the proper direction to budget of the city of Calatrava.
Error: childern Suggestion: children
Error: facilites Suggestion: facilities
Sentence: To bolster it further, the author must provide clear concrete evidences to devote the city budget for the facilities used by adults, perhaps by the suitable analysis of the age group and usage of athletics playing fields as well as recreational activites.
Error: activites Suggestion: activities
argument 1 -- OK
argument 2 -- OK
argument 3 -- not OK. Need to argue against the conclusion. For this topic it is:
As a result, we will have sufficient money to fund city facilities and programs used primarily by adults, since we can expect the adult population of the city to increase.
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Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 4.0 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 6 2
No. of Sentences: 20 15
No. of Words: 528 350
No. of Characters: 2571 1500
No. of Different Words: 205 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.794 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.869 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.578 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 191 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 135 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 98 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 57 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 26.4 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 10.126 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.9 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.361 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.557 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.092 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 260, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'authors'' or 'author's'?
Suggestion: authors'; author's
...dults in the city. At first glance, the authors argument appears to be convincing, but ...
^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 446, Rule ID: DID_BASEFORM[1]
Message: The verb 'will' requires the base form of the verb: 'go'
Suggestion: go
...ty, then definitely the birth rate will going to increase in the future. Presumably, ...
^^^^^
Line 5, column 22, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: didn't
...ore convincing. Secondly, the author didnt mention anything about the usage of ath...
^^^^^
Line 5, column 341, Rule ID: MOST_SOME_OF_NNS[1]
Message: After 'most of', you should use 'the' ('most of the counties') or simply say ''most counties''.
Suggestion: most of the counties; most counties
...ties at greater extent. For example, In most of counties, all the adults like to play football a...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 303, Rule ID: IN_PAST[1]
Message: Did you mean: 'in the future'?
Suggestion: in the future
...ation will enhance the number of adults in future. For instance, if the population of chi...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 459, Rule ID: DID_BASEFORM[1]
Message: The verb 'will' requires the base form of the verb: 'get'
Suggestion: get
...ty of adult age from 20 to 25 will also gets declined in future. Hence, the author s...
^^^^
Line 7, column 473, Rule ID: IN_PAST[1]
Message: Did you mean: 'in the future'?
Suggestion: in the future
...e from 20 to 25 will also gets declined in future. Hence, the author should provide the i...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 696, Rule ID: SO_AS_TO[1]
Message: Use simply 'to'
Suggestion: to
...aying fields and recreational facilites so as to give the proper direction to budget of ...
^^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 20, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'authors'' or 'author's'?
Suggestion: authors'; author's
...ity of Calatrava. In conclusion, the authors argument is unpersuasive as it stands. ...
^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, finally, first, furthermore, hence, however, if, second, secondly, so, then, thus, well, as to, for example, for instance, in conclusion, as well as, first of all
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 18.0 19.6327345309 92% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 16.0 12.9520958084 124% => OK
Conjunction : 9.0 11.1786427146 81% => OK
Relative clauses : 11.0 13.6137724551 81% => OK
Pronoun: 23.0 28.8173652695 80% => OK
Preposition: 85.0 55.5748502994 153% => OK
Nominalization: 22.0 16.3942115768 134% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2626.0 2260.96107784 116% => OK
No of words: 525.0 441.139720559 119% => OK
Chars per words: 5.0019047619 5.12650576532 98% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.78673985869 4.56307096286 105% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.65565754697 2.78398813304 95% => OK
Unique words: 210.0 204.123752495 103% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.4 0.468620217663 85% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 822.6 705.55239521 117% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 5.0 4.96107784431 101% => OK
Article: 12.0 8.76447105788 137% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 2.70958083832 148% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.67365269461 60% => OK
Preposition: 8.0 4.22255489022 189% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 20.0 19.7664670659 101% => OK
Sentence length: 26.0 22.8473053892 114% => OK
Sentence length SD: 55.7125434709 57.8364921388 96% => OK
Chars per sentence: 131.3 119.503703932 110% => OK
Words per sentence: 26.25 23.324526521 113% => OK
Discourse Markers: 8.65 5.70786347227 152% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 9.0 5.25449101796 171% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 14.0 8.20758483034 171% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 6.88822355289 58% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.67664670659 43% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.1412918894 0.218282227539 65% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0473331333315 0.0743258471296 64% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0499749973333 0.0701772020484 71% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0861116311023 0.128457276422 67% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0432352778965 0.0628817314937 69% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 15.2 14.3799401198 106% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 45.09 48.3550499002 93% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 13.4 12.197005988 110% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.02 12.5979740519 95% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.6 8.32208582834 91% => OK
difficult_words: 89.0 98.500998004 90% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 13.5 12.3882235529 109% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.4 11.1389221557 111% => OK
text_standard: 14.0 11.9071856287 118% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.