The following appeared as a recommendation by a committee planning a ten-year budget for the city of Calatrava."The birthrate in our city is declining: in fact, last year's birthrate was only one-half that of five years ago. Thus the number of students en

Essay topics:

The following appeared as a recommendation by a committee planning a ten-year budget for the city of Calatrava.

"The birthrate in our city is declining: in fact, last year's birthrate was only one-half that of five years ago. Thus the number of students enrolled in our public schools will soon decrease dramatically, and we can safely reduce the funds budgeted for education during the next decade. At the same time, we can reduce funding for athletic playing fields and other recreational facilities. As a result, we will have sufficient money to fund city facilities and programs used primarily by adults, since we can expect the adult population of the city to increase."

Write a response in which you discuss what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument and explain how the evidence would weaken or strengthen the argument.

The recommendation by the committee planning a ten-year budget for Calatrava encourages more questions than answers. The recommendation is especially lacking in evidence to support its claims. Even with more evidence, the recommendation is likely to be weakened.

The foremost evidence needed to strengthen the argument is that the reason for a lower birthrate is not related to something else. The case may be that the population of adults in the city is declining. If this is the case, the people of Calatrava should look into the city`s issues as a whole rather than a lower birthrate. Is there a high crime rate, are the schools falling apart, is there a lack of jobs? If any of the aforementioned issues are evidentially true, it is enough reason for a lower number of adults and a lower number of children. Another highly probable reason that the birthrate is declining is the lack of adequate educational and athletic facilities.

A large piece of evidence missing from this recommendation is proof that the birthrate is not declining due to a poorly spent education budget. Adults are less likely to decide to raise children in a place with poor schooling. Therefore, the city should not be looking into increasing adult facilities, but rather, mending child-centered facilities. It is said that children are the future. If children are the future, their well-being and education is more important than a few more bars.

The final piece of evidence that is not provided is whether an increase of adult-centered locations will actually fix the issue of a lower birth rate. It seems as if by lessening the money spent on education in favor of adult facilities the main issue will not be met. Even if adults are out having fun at fancy restaurants or golfing and encourage more people to move to Calatrava, a poor school system will discourage more children and eventually more people will move away when they wish to start families.

To recapitulate, the committee should not adhere to the recommendation as presented. If they do so they will not only fail to properly fix the issue, but they will eventually lead people away from Calatrava once they realize there it is no place to raise a child.

Votes
Average: 4.6 (3 votes)
Essay Categories
Essays by the user:

Comments

Transition Words or Phrases used:
actually, but, if, look, may, so, then, therefore, well

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 29.0 19.6327345309 148% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 10.0 12.9520958084 77% => OK
Conjunction : 8.0 11.1786427146 72% => OK
Relative clauses : 7.0 13.6137724551 51% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 19.0 28.8173652695 66% => OK
Preposition: 41.0 55.5748502994 74% => OK
Nominalization: 15.0 16.3942115768 91% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1841.0 2260.96107784 81% => OK
No of words: 374.0 441.139720559 85% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.92245989305 5.12650576532 96% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.3976220399 4.56307096286 96% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.93828370139 2.78398813304 106% => OK
Unique words: 179.0 204.123752495 88% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.478609625668 0.468620217663 102% => OK
syllable_count: 602.1 705.55239521 85% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 4.0 4.96107784431 81% => OK
Article: 11.0 8.76447105788 126% => OK
Subordination: 5.0 2.70958083832 185% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.67365269461 119% => OK
Preposition: 1.0 4.22255489022 24% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 19.0 19.7664670659 96% => OK
Sentence length: 19.0 22.8473053892 83% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 44.2974083645 57.8364921388 77% => OK
Chars per sentence: 96.8947368421 119.503703932 81% => OK
Words per sentence: 19.6842105263 23.324526521 84% => OK
Discourse Markers: 2.89473684211 5.70786347227 51% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 0.0 5.25449101796 0% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 6.0 8.20758483034 73% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 8.0 6.88822355289 116% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 5.0 4.67664670659 107% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.147098382669 0.218282227539 67% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.049604345911 0.0743258471296 67% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0657324790444 0.0701772020484 94% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0879768419402 0.128457276422 68% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0667217725644 0.0628817314937 106% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.6 14.3799401198 81% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 52.19 48.3550499002 108% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.7 12.197005988 88% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.26 12.5979740519 89% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.0 8.32208582834 96% => OK
difficult_words: 81.0 98.500998004 82% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 7.0 12.3882235529 57% => Linsear_write_formula is low.
gunning_fog: 9.6 11.1389221557 86% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 11.9071856287 101% => OK
What are above readability scores?

---------------------

Rates: 58.33 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.5 Out of 6
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.

Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.0 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 19 15
No. of Words: 374 350
No. of Characters: 1794 1500
No. of Different Words: 173 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.398 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.797 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.85 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 122 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 86 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 73 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 50 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 19.684 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 8.105 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.474 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.299 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.546 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.067 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5