An international development organization, in response to a vitamin A deficiency among people in the impoverished nation of Tagus, has engineered a new breed of millet high in vitamin A. While seeds for this new type of millet cost more, farmers will be p

Author states a vitamin A deficiency in Tagus and suggest a solution that they should fund subsidy for growing millet which is known as rich in vitamin A. Even if their conclusion is right, their plan may not be efficient since it depends on some flawed assumptions.

Firstly, they claim that since millet is already a staple, people get adopted easily. However, even they have stable as an agricultural good, people may not get used to this new breed as fast as author expects. Hence, this plan requires a more detailed demand analysis on society which covers how much people suffer from this deficiency and how much this plan cost at the end. In sum, without statistical analysis, they can not come up with accurate number for needs and a healthy plan.

In addition, this analysis is also needed to check the affordability. Author is sure about that subsidy but it is good to consider that government may not support such breed engineering since there can be more vital needs such as extra health service or homeless service. Starting such a project while the demand is low will surely waste of government sources.

Thirdly, they claim that since millet is already a staple, people get adopted easily and assume that it is the only solution for that issue. However, even they have stable as an agricultural good, people may not get used to or prefer to use this new breed as fast as author expects. Furthermore, they act like millet is the only solution for preventing this deficiency. In fact, they can easily find other alternatives which cost less since vitamin A is common in most of foods. In sum, before jumping into first plan immediately, they should check possible reactions of people and different less costly alternatives.

In conclusion, all the angles and statements illustrate that the proposed solution relies on weak logical assumptions. Before warranting any action, they should conduct a survey on total cost of the plan and the number of people suffering this for cost-benefit analysis and alternatives to compare for checking opportunity cost.

Votes
Average: 5 (1 vote)
Essay Categories

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 190, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...in A. Even if their conclusion is right, their plan may not be efficient since it...
^^
Line 3, column 299, Rule ID: MUCH_COUNTABLE[1]
Message: Use 'many' with countable nouns.
Suggestion: many
...nd analysis on society which covers how much people suffer from this deficiency and ...
^^^^
Line 5, column 186, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...t may not support such breed engineering since there can be more vital needs suc...
^^
Line 5, column 193, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ot support such breed engineering since there can be more vital needs such as ex...
^^
Line 5, column 343, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...e the demand is low will surely waste of government sources. Thirdly, they cl...
^^
Line 7, column 225, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ultural good, people may not get used to or prefer to use this new breed as fast ...
^^
Line 7, column 468, Rule ID: MOST_SOME_OF_NNS[1]
Message: After 'most of', you should use 'the' ('most of the foods') or simply say ''most foods''.
Suggestion: most of the foods; most foods
... cost less since vitamin A is common in most of foods. In sum, before jumping into first pla...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 1, Rule ID: ENGLISH_WORD_REPEAT_BEGINNING_RULE
Message: Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Reword the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
... different less costly alternatives. In conclusion, all the angles and statemen...
^^

Discourse Markers used:
['also', 'but', 'first', 'firstly', 'furthermore', 'hence', 'however', 'if', 'may', 'so', 'third', 'thirdly', 'while', 'in addition', 'in conclusion', 'in fact', 'such as']

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance in Part of Speech:
Nouns: 0.227154046997 0.25644967241 89% => OK
Verbs: 0.154046997389 0.15541462614 99% => OK
Adjectives: 0.107049608355 0.0836205057962 128% => OK
Adverbs: 0.0704960835509 0.0520304965353 135% => OK
Pronouns: 0.0391644908616 0.0272364105082 144% => Less pronouns wanted. Try not to use 'you, I, they, he...' as the subject of a sentence
Prepositions: 0.130548302872 0.125424944231 104% => OK
Participles: 0.0391644908616 0.0416121511921 94% => OK
Conjunctions: 2.61189667249 2.79052419416 94% => OK
Infinitives: 0.0156657963446 0.026700313972 59% => OK
Particles: 0.00261096605744 0.001811407834 144% => OK
Determiners: 0.0861618798956 0.113004496875 76% => OK
Modal_auxiliary: 0.0287206266319 0.0255425247493 112% => OK
WH_determiners: 0.0130548302872 0.0127820249294 102% => OK

Vocabulary words and sentences:
No of characters: 2085.0 2731.13054187 76% => OK
No of words: 348.0 446.07635468 78% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.99137931034 6.12365571057 98% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.31911543099 4.57801047555 94% => OK
words length more than 5 chars: 0.364942528736 0.378187486979 96% => OK
words length more than 6 chars: 0.23275862069 0.287650121315 81% => OK
words length more than 7 chars: 0.158045977011 0.208842608468 76% => OK
words length more than 8 chars: 0.0890804597701 0.135150697306 66% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.61189667249 2.79052419416 94% => OK
Unique words: 173.0 207.018472906 84% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.497126436782 0.469332199767 106% => OK
Word variations: 51.8734411496 52.1807786196 99% => OK
How many sentences: 16.0 20.039408867 80% => OK
Sentence length: 21.75 23.2022227129 94% => OK
Sentence length SD: 39.0659998432 57.7814097925 68% => OK
Chars per sentence: 130.3125 141.986410481 92% => OK
Words per sentence: 21.75 23.2022227129 94% => OK
Discourse Markers: 1.0625 0.724660767414 147% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.14285714286 97% => OK
Language errors: 8.0 3.58251231527 223% => Correct essay format wanted or double check grammar & spelling issues after essay writing.
Readability: 45.025862069 51.9672348444 87% => OK
Elegance: 1.50495049505 1.8405768891 82% => OK

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.289913965079 0.441005458295 66% => OK
Sentence sentence coherence: 0.0804048598297 0.135418324435 59% => OK
Sentence sentence coherence SD: 0.045992954518 0.0829849096947 55% => OK
Sentence paragraph coherence: 0.515821021903 0.58762219726 88% => OK
Sentence paragraph coherence SD: 0.127756543284 0.147661913831 87% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.111432640223 0.193483328276 58% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0594000409233 0.0970749176394 61% => OK
Paragraph paragraph coherence: 0.234747608965 0.42659136922 55% => OK
Paragraph paragraph coherence SD: 0.039814789873 0.0774707102158 51% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.183867974806 0.312017818177 59% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0373462778018 0.0698173142475 53% => The ideas may be duplicated in paragraphs.

Task Achievement:
Sentences with positive sentiment : 9.0 8.33743842365 108% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 6.87684729064 73% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.82512315271 41% => OK
Positive topic words: 6.0 6.46551724138 93% => OK
Negative topic words: 3.0 5.36822660099 56% => OK
Neutral topic words: 2.0 2.82389162562 71% => OK
Total topic words: 11.0 14.657635468 75% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

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Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6 -- The score is based on the average performance of 20,000 argument essays. This e-grader is not smart enough to check on arguments.
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Note: This is not the final score. The e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.