The author contends that a new jazz music club would be an enormously lucrative enterprise. To support the judgement, the author cited the evidence that a number of people attended the jazz festival last summer and the fact that several jazz musicians live in Monroe. Although it seems convincing, careful examination of the evidences reveal that they lend little credible support to the author's claim, rendering the argument unfounded as it stands.
To begin with, the author believes that the proposed new jazz club in Monroe would conquer the local market due to the fact that the nearset jazz club is 65 miles far away. However, there is no evidence showing that the proposed club could attract local jazz fans simply due to geographical reason. It's entirely possible that people would still prefer the old jazz club owing to their habits and familiar relationship with the club owner. There could be some famous jazz musicians in that club, making people reluctant to change their choice. Facilities there might also be of the best in the nation, which is difficult to excel. Without considering these factors above, it is too early to reach the conclusion that the new proposed club would attract local jazz fans.
Secondly, the author claims that jazz is extremely popular in Monroe, refering to the fact that several musicians live in Monroe and the annual jazz festival saw an audience of over 100,000 people last summer. However, these evidince lends little support to the claim that jazz in Monroe is quite popular. There is possibility that those musicians chose to live in Monroe simply beacause of the quiet and beautiful environment here. Low price of houses and living cost could also be appealing factors that persuaded them to live here. As for the festival, the attendance number of the festival other than last summer is not given. There is possibility that people attending the festival last summer declined sharply when compared to statistics of previous years. Before giving convincing explanation to the evincences cited above, it's unsubstantiated to assert that jazz is rather popular in Monroe.
Moreover, the author cited a nation wide survey indicating that expenditure of a typical jazz fan on jazz entertainment is nearly $1000 per year, implying that jazz fans in Monroe would spend similar amount of money on jazz clubs. But the situation of the individual case of Monroe might not be the same as the general situation of the nation. It's likely that Monroe is a relatively less developed region, where people are less likely to spend so much money on entertainment as those in large cities. Jazz fans distribution might also be unbalanced while the number of jazz fans in Monroe is not as many as those in capital cities. Other entertainment like football and basketball games with more advertisements could be a more favored choice for the citizens in Monroe. Without ruling out these factors, it's not convincing to predict jazz fans in Monroe would spend as much as stated by the survey.
In sum, evidences cited by the author lend little support to the argument, leading it to be unfounded as it stands. To substantiate the argument, the detailed popularity of jazz music in Monroe need to be investigated.
Essay evaluation report
Sentence: To begin with, the author believes that the proposed new jazz club in Monroe would conquer the local market due to the fact that the nearset jazz club is 65 miles far away.
Error: nearset Suggestion: nearest
Sentence: Secondly, the author claims that jazz is extremely popular in Monroe, refering to the fact that several musicians live in Monroe and the annual jazz festival saw an audience of over 100,000 people last summer.
Error: refering Suggestion: No alternate word
Sentence: However, these evidince lends little support to the claim that jazz in Monroe is quite popular.
Error: evidince Suggestion: evidence
Sentence: There is possibility that those musicians chose to live in Monroe simply beacause of the quiet and beautiful environment here.
Error: beacause Suggestion: because
Sentence: Before giving convincing explanation to the evincences cited above, it's unsubstantiated to assert that jazz is rather popular in Monroe.
Error: evincences Suggestion: evidences
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argument 1 -- OK
argument 2 -- OK
argument 3 -- OK
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lost one argument:
'and the highest-rated radio program in Monroe is 'Jazz Nightly,' which airs every weeknight at 7 P.M.'
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Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 4.5 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 5 2
No. of Sentences: 24 15
No. of Words: 541 350
No. of Characters: 2657 1500
No. of Different Words: 231 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.823 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.911 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.543 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 192 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 120 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 89 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 54 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 22.542 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 6.258 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.5 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.338 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.532 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.117 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 671, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...Without considering these factors above, it is too early to reach the conclusion ...
^^
Line 7, column 30, Rule ID: NATION_WIDE[1]
Message: Did you mean 'nationwide'?
Suggestion: nationwide
...onroe. Moreover, the author cited a nation wide survey indicating that expenditure of a...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 823, Rule ID: ALLOW_TO[1]
Message: Did you mean 'predicting'? Or maybe you should add a pronoun? In active voice, 'convince' + 'to' takes an object, usually a pronoun.
Suggestion: predicting
...g out these factors, its not convincing to predict jazz fans in Monroe would spend as much...
^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, however, if, moreover, second, secondly, so, still, while, as for, to begin with
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 23.0 19.6327345309 117% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 14.0 12.9520958084 108% => OK
Conjunction : 7.0 11.1786427146 63% => OK
Relative clauses : 23.0 13.6137724551 169% => OK
Pronoun: 39.0 28.8173652695 135% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 71.0 55.5748502994 128% => OK
Nominalization: 17.0 16.3942115768 104% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2711.0 2260.96107784 120% => OK
No of words: 541.0 441.139720559 123% => OK
Chars per words: 5.01109057301 5.12650576532 98% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.82280071112 4.56307096286 106% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.60023287636 2.78398813304 93% => OK
Unique words: 239.0 204.123752495 117% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.441774491682 0.468620217663 94% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 838.8 705.55239521 119% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 6.0 4.96107784431 121% => OK
Article: 7.0 8.76447105788 80% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 2.70958083832 111% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.67365269461 60% => OK
Preposition: 7.0 4.22255489022 166% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 24.0 19.7664670659 121% => OK
Sentence length: 22.0 22.8473053892 96% => OK
Sentence length SD: 36.3252810267 57.8364921388 63% => OK
Chars per sentence: 112.958333333 119.503703932 95% => OK
Words per sentence: 22.5416666667 23.324526521 97% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.79166666667 5.70786347227 66% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 5.25449101796 57% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 16.0 8.20758483034 195% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 6.88822355289 58% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 4.67664670659 86% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.427687329119 0.218282227539 196% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.134226127612 0.0743258471296 181% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.124370496339 0.0701772020484 177% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.244297121767 0.128457276422 190% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.125818285041 0.0628817314937 200% => More connections among paragraphs wanted.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.4 14.3799401198 93% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 49.15 48.3550499002 102% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.9 12.197005988 98% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.07 12.5979740519 96% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.11 8.32208582834 97% => OK
difficult_words: 116.0 98.500998004 118% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 13.5 12.3882235529 109% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.8 11.1389221557 97% => OK
text_standard: 14.0 11.9071856287 118% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.