"A recently issued twenty-year study on headaches suffered by the residents of Mentia investigated the possible therapeutic effect of consuming salicylates. Salicylates are members of the same chemical family as aspirin, a medicine used to treat headaches. Although many foods are naturally rich in salicylates, food-processing companies also add salicylates to foods as preservatives. The twenty-year study found a correlation between the rise in the commercial use of salicylates and a steady decline in the average number of headaches reported by study participants. At the time when the study concluded, food-processing companies had just discovered that salicylates can also be used as flavor additives for foods, and, as a result, many companies plan to do so. Based on these study results, some health experts predict that residents of Mentia will suffer even fewer headaches in the future."
In this article, the author points out that twenty years study showed that consuming salicylates by residents of Mentia decreased number of headaches. He/She also projects that some health experts anticipate that residents of Mentia will suffer even fewer headeaches due to more using salicylates foods as flavor. To bolster the assertion, the article renders the fact that there is correlation between using salicylates and headaches. The article also relies on an ambiguous study. Close scrutiny of each of facts that mentioned in argument reveals that none of them lends credible support to the conclusion as it stands.
The author infers that using salicylates is the only cause for decreasing headaches. However, he/she ignores other possible causes of decreasing headacjes; for example better life styles and consuming healthier foods to name just a few. Without eliminating alternative possibilites such as these, the author cannot justify her/his assertion.
The study methodology is problematic is some aspects. First, the article does not indicate what percentage of respondents engaged is study used salicylates only through consuming foods. Perhaps some of them used salicylates as a part of their curing. Second, we are not informed how they collect information about using salicylates. It is entirely possible that participants use another things that affected their headaches. If it turns out, for example, that some of them used aspirins that decreased headaches, then the author’s conclusion is unwarranted. To persuade me that using salicylates was the major term that decreased number of headaches in Mentia , that author must provide more evidance that how they did the study.
Another fundamental problem with the argument is that assuming that at one time using salicylates helped people in Mentia to decrease number of their headaches, the author infers a similar condition in the future, but it is not necessarily the case. There are many factors that can affect headaches. If it transpires, for example, that they use other foods that has a more effective chemical substance than salicylates, then the author’s projection is uncalled for.
In sum, the article relies on cant evidence and questionable study that renders it unconvincing and ill grounded as it stands. The argument would have been stronger had it provided more information respecting residents of Mentia and foods that they used.
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The study methodology is problematic is some aspects.
The study methodology is problematic in some aspects.
Sentence: It is entirely possible that participants use another things that affected their headaches.
Description: A determiner/pronoun, singular is not usually followed by a noun, plural, common
Suggestion: Refer to another and things
that they use other foods that has a more effective chemical substance
that they use other foods that have more effective chemical substances
Sentence: He/She also projects that some health experts anticipate that residents of Mentia will suffer even fewer headeaches due to more using salicylates foods as flavor.
Error: headeaches Suggestion: headaches
Sentence: However, he/she ignores other possible causes of decreasing headacjes; for example better life styles and consuming healthier foods to name just a few.
Error: headacjes Suggestion: headaches
Sentence: Without eliminating alternative possibilites such as these, the author cannot justify her/his assertion.
Error: possibilites Suggestion: possibilities
Sentence: To persuade me that using salicylates was the major term that decreased number of headaches in Mentia , that author must provide more evidance that how they did the study.
Error: evidance Suggestion: evidence
argument 1 -- ? how did you get 'The author infers that using salicylates is the only cause for decreasing headaches.'?
argument 2 -- OK
argument 3 -- OK
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 4.0 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 3 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 4 2
No. of Sentences: 20 15
No. of Words: 380 350
No. of Characters: 1998 1500
No. of Different Words: 196 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.415 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.258 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.751 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 152 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 116 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 86 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 61 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 19 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 8.112 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.45 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.318 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.521 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.13 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5