Several recent studies have shown a link between health and stair usage. One recently completed study shows that people who live in stairs-only apartment buildings (that is, buildings without elevators) live an average of three years longer than do people who live in buildings with both elevators and stairs. A second study shows that elderly residents of buildings with elevators make, on average, twice as many visits to doctors each year as do residents of buildings without elevators. Furthermore, several doctor's offices are reporting that residents of stairs-only buildings scored higher than average on questionnaires administered to new patients, in which the patients were asked to rate several aspects of their own health (e.g., fitness, sleep quality, susceptibility to injury, etc.). The clearest explanation for these findings is that the moderate daily exercise required of residents who must use the stairs instead of elevators increases people's health and longevity.
Write a response in which you discuss one or more alternative explanations that could rival the proposed explanation and explain how your explanation(s) can plausibly account for the facts presented in the argument.
The author of the argument concludes that the moderate daily exercise required of residents who must use the stairs instead of elevators increases people’s health and longevity . Though the argument have some merits, because of the lack of relevant evidence, unaddressed assumptions, the author’s argument is unsubstantiated and deeply flawed.
It is stated that people who live in stairs-only apartment buildings live an average of three years longer than people who live in buildings with both elevators and stairs. However, there is no evidence that people in buildings with elevators use it. For example, there may be only two storey buildings where people may not require elevators. We just do not know. Unless it is fully representavive and reliable, it cannot be used effectively to back the author’s argument.
The author implies that elderly residents of buildings with elevators make twice as many visits to doctors each year as do residents of buildings without elevators. However, there can be several other factors to visit a doctor. There is no clear evidence to the presented study. For example, a person suffering with diabetes or cancer visits doctor more often. It has nothing to do with elevators or stairs.
Additionally, the questions asked in questionnaires are not mentioned in the argument. The questions asked to the people in buildings with elevator and the questions asked to the people in buildings without elevator may be different. There is no evidence that the questions asked are similar. The argument did not mention anything related to the age of the patients which is also an important factor for the study to be accurate.
Lastly, the argument did not specify the count of people on which the study is applied. The count may vary from the buildings with elevators and without elevators. We never know. The author missed the details of the studies which are important to support the argument.
Examining all the facts shown in the studies, the author’s argument is not likely to justify the link between health and stairs usage. Detailed and valid information is needed to support the proposed explanation.
Comments
e-rater score report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 22 15
No. of Words: 348 350
No. of Characters: 1755 1500
No. of Different Words: 160 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.319 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.043 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.664 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 141 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 105 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 76 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 46 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 15.818 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 7.259 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.364 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.301 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.501 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.1 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 177, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Don't put a space before the full stop
Suggestion: .
... increases people’s health and longevity . Though the argument have some merits, b...
^^
Line 2, column 112, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ve an average of three years longer than people who live in buildings with both e...
^^
Line 2, column 208, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...airs. However, there is no evidence that people in buildings with elevators use i...
^^
Line 2, column 431, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...entavive and reliable, it cannot be used effectively to back the author’s argumen...
^^
Line 4, column 147, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...to the people in buildings with elevator and the questions asked to the people i...
^^
Line 4, column 186, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...r and the questions asked to the people in buildings without elevator may be dif...
^^
Line 4, column 415, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...s also an important factor for the study to be accurate. Lastly, the argument di...
^^
Line 6, column 75, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...he studies, the author’s argument is not likely to justify the link between healt...
^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, however, if, lastly, may, so, for example
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 18.0 19.6327345309 92% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 7.0 12.9520958084 54% => OK
Conjunction : 10.0 11.1786427146 89% => OK
Relative clauses : 12.0 13.6137724551 88% => OK
Pronoun: 12.0 28.8173652695 42% => OK
Preposition: 44.0 55.5748502994 79% => OK
Nominalization: 17.0 16.3942115768 104% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1808.0 2260.96107784 80% => OK
No of words: 348.0 441.139720559 79% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.19540229885 5.12650576532 101% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.31911543099 4.56307096286 95% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.78737805851 2.78398813304 100% => OK
Unique words: 165.0 204.123752495 81% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.474137931034 0.468620217663 101% => OK
syllable_count: 566.1 705.55239521 80% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 5.0 4.96107784431 101% => OK
Article: 11.0 8.76447105788 126% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 2.70958083832 111% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.67365269461 0% => OK
Preposition: 1.0 4.22255489022 24% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 22.0 19.7664670659 111% => OK
Sentence length: 15.0 22.8473053892 66% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 47.724242328 57.8364921388 83% => OK
Chars per sentence: 82.1818181818 119.503703932 69% => OK
Words per sentence: 15.8181818182 23.324526521 68% => OK
Discourse Markers: 2.13636363636 5.70786347227 37% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 6.0 5.15768463074 116% => OK
Language errors: 8.0 5.25449101796 152% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 2.0 8.20758483034 24% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 11.0 6.88822355289 160% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 9.0 4.67664670659 192% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.347067815545 0.218282227539 159% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0868259909635 0.0743258471296 117% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.119956259995 0.0701772020484 171% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.16520584395 0.128457276422 129% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.107626134451 0.0628817314937 171% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.0 14.3799401198 76% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 56.25 48.3550499002 116% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.1 12.197005988 75% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.58 12.5979740519 100% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.92 8.32208582834 95% => OK
difficult_words: 78.0 98.500998004 79% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 12.3882235529 89% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.0 11.1389221557 72% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 11.9071856287 92% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.